How to help motivate my boyfriend

I would leave him alone. It is his body, and you will likely only disrupt the relationship by trying to "help." Men are very resistant to womens' attempts at "fixing" things.

Personal experience...you can't. Motivation comes from within. My dad tried to "motivate" me with digs about my weight most of my adult life. I had to decide on my own that it was important to me. My husband looks like he's gonna deliver any day now. He's beginning to change because it's hard for him to keep up with me. Do what is best for you. He may decide for himself to do it just by watching your example.

If you can't get him motivated by your excitement, you can ask him to HELP YOU stay honest and motivated by doing this with you but if not, I don't think there is much you can do. I did just get my parents motiviated to join the site because I raved about how easy it was to use... that is the best I can do righ tnow

Good luck! :flowerforyou:

why does he have to eat cafeteria food. Most places let you bring your own Lunch.
When my bf started his new job. he had to lift stuff and he started to get a bit of muscle so I started to really compliement how good they looked and how muscle was hott. So He kept working on getting more muscle then when he stopped. Now
The way Im trying to get my bf into shape is that each time he loses a lb, He gets a token. 5 tokens can be redeemed for
"nookie" and I'm not allowed to say no. But I've been with my bf for many years and he has a ton of trouble getting me to say yes. LOl

My boyfriend is the same way..He was the one who actually decided we should do this together..

I've been doing this for a month on my own while his fat *kitten* sleeps.

I try to motivate him and even ask him to join me,but he to busy eating fried chicken.:laugh:

So I gave up on trying to help him..As long as I'm doing it for myself then that's all that matters. You cant help someone who isn't willing to help themselves.

When he sees your progress he may just start doing it him self, my boyfriend lost allot of weight first then I wanted to at the least slim down to my weight when we started dating. So I started walking and recording how much I was really eating and now we are kind of doing it together. He still tries to get me to do all of the MFP stuff for him but he is watching how much of what ever he’s eating. I still can’t get him to do the 30day shred with me every day though.

We are the other way around. My hubby is fit and healthy. He has never tried to make me eat healthier but he has always supported any attempt I make.

That is all you can do. Do what you need for yourself ask him if he would like to join you if not then leave him be. He may well decide on his own when he sees how healthy you are getting.

Being loving and being an example is probably the best thing I have ever done in a situation like this. It is not unusual that when one person is on a mission, that they feel the other person they are in a relationship should follow along.

It is your journey and if he decides to embrace the same ideas, then that is his journey. Besides, the focus should not be on him, but rather on yourself and your goals.

Peace,

As a man who had a woman harping on him for 7 years of marriage about his weight don't do it.

If he isn't ready to make the change then he won't do it. It to this day ticks my wife off that after 7 years one day I woke up and decided I wanted to lose weight. All her nagging ever did was tick me off and start arguments. He isn't going to lose until he wants to lose. If he isn't wanting to lose he might do it for awhile to please you but he will fall off the wagon and go back to his old ways. He has to want it.

Invite him to join MFP :bigsmile:

I'm in the same situation, distance relationship and both of us needing change. I think the best thing to do is nothing, at least not to him. You can't make someone do something they don't want to do, and they wont succeed if they aren't doing it for themselves.

What I do is just stick to my guns. When we're visiting one another I still will get up in the morning and go for a run and workout, I always ask the night before if he wants to go with me but don't pressure him to do so. Sometimes he goes and sometimes he sleeps in. I also stick to my eating habits while he can do what he wants as long as my choices are respected. Lately, I've noticed that he's starting to try to work out and eat better. Not because I said so though, because he is choosing to do so. So just keep doing what you're doing and setting the good example.

My husband is overweight as was I before coming here. I've been at this over a year and have lost quite a bit of weight. When we met I was overweight, then gained more...a lot more. I'm now 30 lbs less than when we met 8 years ago.
I tried encouraging him to do this with me. He attempted it for a couple of months and then quit. He has yet to get back on the bandwagon, and I'm not saying anything about it. I figure, if seeing my weight loss hasn't done the trick, there is nothing I say that will help either. :ohwell:

He will most likely come around, it took me a long time but I eventually did.

My husband is overweight as was I before coming here. I've been at this over a year and have lost quite a bit of weight. When we met I was overweight, then gained more...a lot more. I'm now 30 lbs less than when we met 8 years ago.
I tried encouraging him to do this with me. He attempted it for a couple of months and then quit. He has yet to get back on the bandwagon, and I'm not saying anything about it. I figure, if seeing my weight loss hasn't done the trick, there is nothing I say that will help either. :ohwell:

He will most likely come around, it took me a long time but I eventually did.

I hope so!

My sister in law works hard to keep her husband "Johnny" on his diet. He has yo-yo'd from a low of 220 to a high of 350. (My husband and "Johnny" are brothers, and both are BIG guys).
Everytime I even THINK about saying something to my guy about what he is eating I hear s-i-l's very shrill, loud voice yelling "Johnny that is your 3 third cookie" like he is a misbehaving 3 year old.
I can't say anything to my guy. He can, will and has dug his heels in whenever I have tried to change his behavior. Right now, I am concentrating on my eating habits. If he wants to change his, I will encourage him - but it has to be his choice.