Why are people so judgmental??

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jooleeyah
jooleeyah Posts: 70
in Health and Weight Loss
It's a funny thing....we're all this site to try and achieve the same goals. Lose weight, attain health, and live better lives. We may disagree on what is the best way to get there, but we are all trying to go to the same place. Yet people feel a need to judge and condemn others' methods, often without knowing all the facts or being truly informed. Just because you think/know one way that is right for YOU does NOT mean you know best for everyone. I think that audacity of the "I am RIGHT and you are WRONG" attitude is quite unbecoming.

Let's apply this to religious beliefs. Imagine that a Christian were to say to a Muslim or Jew or a Buddhist: "Though we are all trying to be good people, do the right thing, and believe in a higher power, YOUR religious beliefs/practices are WRONG and MINE are RIGHT." How do you feel about that?

I have lost 18lbs using HCG on a 500 calorie diet in 3 weeks that includes fresh fruits/veggies/lean meats. That is the method that I, as an informed adult, made based on carefully researching both sides including all the hcg dangers/side effects/placebo effect. I carefully monitor the loss to make sure I am not losing muscle. I still do yoga and power walking and feel very energized and not hungry. HCG did not negative affect my TOM or any other effects that I have noticed. In a few days I will move into the next pause 1500+ calorie diet that is mostly unrestricted except for sugars (not including fruits) and starches and I plan on beginning Jillian's 30DS. I plan on keeping the weight off through changing my eating habits and lifestyle permanently, including eating fresh fruits/veggies/lean proteins/whole grains and cutting out processed foods, regular exercise and activity (This is what the diet advocates as well). I know several people that have been successful losing much more weight than I did and have successfully kept it off for months/years.

I'm not here to judge anyone else's methods. I don't think that I have that right. If you choose to do Atkins or Paleo or exercise 6 hours a day, that is your business and I applaud you for your efforts to achieve a healthy lifestyle based on what YOU think is best for YOU and NOT my own personal ideals. Those are not the right choices for me, but I am not here to condemn you or your choices. All I have to offer is love and support for all of the MFP community because we are all trying to get to the same place no matter how we get there.

Peace and Love to All. Good luck on your weight loss journey, whatever method you choose - I wish you all the greatest success :)

Replies

  • mdfeller
    mdfeller Posts: 135
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    I agree with your post. People everywhere are pretty hateful when trying to push their own opinions, bash another person for their way of thinking, or quick to tell someone that they're doing it wrong. Not just in religion or weight loss as you have mentioned, but in every aspect of life.
  • lor007
    lor007 Posts: 884 Member
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    Maybe it is because those "judgmental" people like to promote a healthy, sustainable lifestyle.

    I am curious, do you plan to ingest pregnant woman urine and live off of 500 calories your whole life? It sounds like a great time to me!
  • poisongirl6485
    poisongirl6485 Posts: 1,487 Member
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    While I agree people are too judgmental, it's quite the stretch to compare weight loss to religion. Not quite the same when one greatly affects your health where other is a matter of belief or point of view.
  • shauna121211
    shauna121211 Posts: 575 Member
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    Hunny, let's be honest, there's no such thing as the perfect get thin quick diet.

    This is a public forum and people are going to disagree. If you don't like being judged, why the heck are you on the forums?

    We're all here to wish success for one another, but if someone feels strongly against a diet that consists of starving themselves on a 500 calorie diet while consuming some gross serum, them they are going to comment.

    Personally, it sounds ridiculous to me for someone to lose 18 lbs in 3 weeks or 23 pounds in 25 days and all the other outrageous losses out there, but I wish you the best of luck in keeping that weight off.

    But to answer your question, people are judgmental because it is in our nature to be and there's this glorious little thing called freedom of speech that allows us be.
  • voluptuous_veggie
    voluptuous_veggie Posts: 476 Member
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    Can I ask how exactly you are monitoring your loss so you know you aren't losing muscle?
  • carolinedb
    carolinedb Posts: 236 Member
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    I'm sorry that you feel judged. It must be hard to feel like your success is being bashed. That being said, there are a lot of people who are very against the HCG diet. I am one of them. I am in no way trying to belittle the success you've had with it, just trying to say that if a controversial topic is brought up, expect controversial opinions/responses.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    oh fun! A judgy AND HCG thread all wrapped up in one! Let's go crazy and also talk about water intake...
  • jessashcher
    jessashcher Posts: 155
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    I think your post is good and to LorLNill if you had read the whole post then you would have seen that this person plans on moving up to the next step which is 1500 calories and change his eating lifestyle, that is just how this person is starting out. If the plan works for you that is great, I know that my daughter did the hcg diet and lost 20 lbs. in 1 month but her problem was that she didn't change her eating habits after that and put the weight and then some back on. And also it's not like you are drinking straight from a pregnant woman, duh, it goes through a process before it's even bottled, do you drink tap water anyone because you would be very surprised what was originally in that.
  • Amy911Gray
    Amy911Gray Posts: 685 Member
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    People are like that. And somewhere in that statement is an answer that I'm looking for as well.

    In July, I had an interview for an international travel position with Cameron. They have a big presence in this area. Anyway, the guy interviewing me told first of all that I had no leadership skills. Then he looked at me, turned his head, and proclaimed that there was no way I could sit on an airplane for 20 hours.

    He had just called me FAT in an interview. Granted at the time I weighted about 250lb, but really this was not the Ms USA pageant.

    People judge things they don't understand. I understand the fast weight loss and if I could afford it and stick with it (two things I can't do), I would. Because I'm tired of this weight. Sick and tired...

    So I do what I can to lose the weight. I'm at a 1000 calorie meal plan and up until Sunday, I was increasing my walk to 10,000 steps (5 miles) progressively. The weight is coming off quite nicely..

    Good luck in your endeavors...and if you find the answer to your question and mine, please post!!! I for one would be glad to hear it! :)
  • CaWaterBug8
    CaWaterBug8 Posts: 1,040 Member
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    tl;dr
  • MrsFarrow
    MrsFarrow Posts: 326 Member
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    Prepare for lockdown in t-minus 3...2...1...
  • KickassYas
    KickassYas Posts: 397 Member
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    as long as you're not touting a major eating disorder i don't give a crap what you do.

    good luck in your loss. :)
  • adamswife23
    adamswife23 Posts: 52 Member
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    I know what you mean. I got de friended by my cousin on facebook and asked her why for her to reply back because she didn't want to hear about me working out or going running and didn't like that I posted photos of myself in my bathing suit to show my progress. Then she had the balls to say that she enjoyed going to church with her family and watching her boys grow up basically saying because i didn't post such updates that I didn't care about my family or believe in God anymore. It really hurt. Just because you don't want to become healthier and change your life doesn't mean that I cannot. I also don't think that Jesus would disown me because I chose to become healthier and live a better lifestyle. I don't know why people have to be so cruel to us who are wanting to become healthier
  • MrsFarrow
    MrsFarrow Posts: 326 Member
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    And also it's not like you are drinking straight from a pregnant woman, duh, it goes through a process before it's even bottled, do you drink tap water anyone because you would be very surprised what was originally in that.
    So for the most part, everything here has been a whole bunch of tl;dr, but I did read the snarky (in a funny way!) comment about pregnant urine. Then this response. And this absolutely disgusts me.

    "Duh, it's distilled urine! SHEESH!" Is what I'm reading. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's what I get from it.

    And personally I do not drink tap water as I find it disgusting.
  • lor007
    lor007 Posts: 884 Member
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    I think your post is good and to LorLNill if you had read the whole post then you would have seen that this person plans on moving up to the next step which is 1500 calories and change his eating lifestyle, that is just how this person is starting out. If the plan works for you that is great, I know that my daughter did the hcg diet and lost 20 lbs. in 1 month but her problem was that she didn't change her eating habits after that and put the weight and then some back on. And also it's not like you are drinking straight from a pregnant woman, duh, it goes through a process before it's even bottled, do you drink tap water anyone because you would be very surprised what was originally in that.

    Sorry, it was a combination of tl;dr and religion.

    Also, I think I will take my chances with the tap water and my filter.
  • SewerUrchin
    SewerUrchin Posts: 53
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    I understand it's frustrating if it's working for you so far and people rip on it; it can feel a bit like a personal attack. However, I'm sure no-one's trying to be mean or belittle your success; they're probably just concerned about the effects of the diet (I have to admit, I'm a bit unsure as to what it entails, I'll have a looksee online). I guess a lot of people on this site have lost weight, and, on the way, have encountered/tried what they now perceive as "fad" diets because they often lead to the dieter putting weight back on once they resume eating normally.
    It sounds like you're willing to make the proper lifestyle changes required to keep the weight off, so that's definitely a positive.

    Thing is, with messageboards, not everyone is going to agree with you. If someone's being genuinely rude, then they're just being a cretin, but most "judgemental" attitudes probably just come from people's concern. :)
  • Unwrapping_Candy
    Unwrapping_Candy Posts: 487 Member
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    shortbuspic1_ief5.jpg
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
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    I personally hope that if I post a plan out here that others find dangerous and can point to many reasons why it is dangerous, that they voice their disagreements and tell me that what I am trying to do is dangerous. I was just looking at an ad for HCG. In the ad it said this:
    "If you are interested in trying the hcg diet plan, then you have probably heard people talk about hcg diet dangers. These dangers are mostly myths."

    The site did not address at all what are 'mostly' myths, and what are truths. I don't believe this is a safe plan, even if it does give a maintenance plan that give you a normal amount of calories. It is the time with such low calories that I have a problem with. If you went to a doctor and told them you were eating 500 calories, they would tell you that you probably have an eating disorder. Why does that change because you are taking a synthetic hormone that mimics pregnancy?

    You don't have to agree with me, but please, don't expect me to say, well, since you believe it, I am going to tell you that I think it is safe and you should go for it.
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
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    I think your post is good and to LorLNill if you had read the whole post then you would have seen that this person plans on moving up to the next step which is 1500 calories and change his eating lifestyle, that is just how this person is starting out. If the plan works for you that is great, I know that my daughter did the hcg diet and lost 20 lbs. in 1 month but her problem was that she didn't change her eating habits after that and put the weight and then some back on. And also it's not like you are drinking straight from a pregnant woman, duh, it goes through a process before it's even bottled, do you drink tap water anyone because you would be very surprised what was originally in that.

    The difference is the chemicals are filtered out of the tap water. In the HCG diet, the chemical is what you're ingesting. Soi, I'm really not even sure the point you are trying to make with that statement.

    As for HCG in general, anorexics eat between 600-800 calories a day on average. Any supposed "diet" that has you eating less than an anorexic for any amount of time is very unhealthy.
  • sandhillcrane
    sandhillcrane Posts: 301
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    I think it was the 'tone' of your first post that made people react.
This discussion has been closed.

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