Tunnel of Darkness......from my blog

I'm trying to stay out of a bad place right now, but it's tough. I felt SO good on Friday...enjoy some time with a friend, having a beer and healthy dinner out. But I paid for it Saturday. I have been really down and exhausted, which doesn't make me ever want to drink again if that's the case!

I have been pushing and pushing myself, and having bumps in the road, knee issues, back issues, potentially broken foot issues...I've see a lot the last 2 months. But today broke the camel's back. Since Tuesday, I was training and had a an excruciating pain from my shoulder to the back of my head. I'm pushing...trying to get through...then all week it's coming and going. It's wearing my down! I'm frustrated and hate that my body is crapping out. I called my trainer and set up a session, just so I wouldn't stop working out. Of course...the pain comes back during the session and I'm trying to hold it together! At least, I was distracted most of the time from moving on to the next exercise.

I hate feeling this way...so negative, when Friday I was so positive and ready to set new goals for training. Then I don't feel tough enough, which aggravates me and frustrates me even more. It's such a vicious cycle. I know I can get through this, but I just feel so alone. My ultimate goal was to start feeling better, and lately I just feel horrible and its getting to me.

I'll just keep walking through the dark tunnel, hoping I'll see that light soon. But I know if I don't keep walking, I'll never see the light. For now, I just feel like I'm crawling, with someone kicking me every inch of the way!

My trainer talks about peaks and valleys....well I feel like I went from Mt. Everest to Death Valley in one swoop!

Oh well tomorrow is a new day!

Thanks and congrats on your weight loss! :flowerforyou: I'm just tough on myself and then my other part of my brain is screaming for the tough side to back off! LOL:mad:
Just another learning experience! :bigsmile:

The big reason I'm frustrated is that it isn't muscle soreness. I have nagging knees that get pain from an inflamed IT band, and my shoulder, neck and back due to a car accident. I go to therapy and things were progressing, but this latest pain blindsided me. I hate my body letting me down, cuz when I get stressed or angry, working out makes me feel better.
Sorry to hear about your tough week. I hope you and your hubby can come together more than be at each other, but its understandable.
I guess if obstacles and challenges were easy, then what we be the point!? We'll all get through this....its a tough time out in the world, and by us trying to be healthy, we are going to improve our lives!

Thanks for your support.....I'm really trying to be positive with the tunnel of darkness....since if I keep trudging through, I'll see the light eventually. Of course when it is dark, you feel alone and disoriented...very much to my life right now.
I'm not one to relax very well, so it is hard. I do stretch after a workout to relax and sorta meditate. I should go find my Tai Chi DVD buried somewhere!

I'll get through this....I'm more angry at myself for feeling this way. For some reason, picking me up off the ground, just seems harder this time.

"It's not about getting knocked down, it's about getting back up." V. Lombardi