Why is everyone so rude on here?

prettyinpink116
prettyinpink116 Posts: 35 Member
edited October 4 in Motivation and Support
Well maybe not everyone and no offense to you if your readin this and haven't been rude to anyone. But it just seems like alot of people are negative and not interested in motivating one another but instead interested in tearing them down.

I posted a question about the show I Used to Be Fat, & I didn't once say I wanted to do what they did, but was just curious as to how they achieve such crazy results, as it took me about 6 months to lose 60 lbs, not 6 weeks like on the show, & I got some answers from people being very sarcastic, rude & talking to me in a condescending tone like I'm dumb for thinking I can do what they do when if they would've read my question they would've seen that I'm not interested in doing what they do, just curious how they do it.

& I just went on the motivation&support section and a girl asked a question about how to lose 10lbs quickly and people were ripping her head off! A lot of the answers were so mean.

I'm just curious does anyone else notice this? Why are people so mean and unsupportive on here? I thought this was a place to share success stories & get support from one another? Whats going on?
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Replies

  • _SusieQ_
    _SusieQ_ Posts: 2,964 Member
    Well maybe not everyone and no offense to you if your readin this and haven't been rude to anyone. But it just seems like alot of people are negative and not interested in motivating one another but instead interested in tearing them down.

    I posted a question about the show I Used to Be Fat, & I didn't once say I wanted to do what they did, but wad just curious as to how them people achieve results, as it took me about 6 months to lose 60 lbs, not 6 weeks like on the show, & I got some answer where people were being very sarcastic, downright rude & talking to me in a condescending tone like I'm dumb for thinking I can do what they do when if they would've read my question they would've seen that I'm not interested just curious.

    & I just went on the motivation&support section and a girl asked a question about how to lose 10lbs quickly and people were ripping her head off! A lot of the answers were so mean.

    I'm just curious does anyone else notice this? Why are people so mean and unsupportive on here? I thought this was a place to share success stories & get support from one another? Whats going on?


    There is a fair amount of rudeness from time to time from people who have read/seen the same questions over and over. They could use a little more patience sometimes.
    But the girl on the other thread resorted to calling everyone FAT and lazy b/c they basically didn't support a very dangerous thing she was trying to do. She got what she deserved.
  • kellyw74
    kellyw74 Posts: 9
    i am not rude. you can add me as a friend and i will give you advice and support.

    Hugs.

    Kelly
  • LadyGhostDuchess
    LadyGhostDuchess Posts: 894 Member
    I am sorry you have been faced with rude people :( Sadly they are everywhere no matter where you go. But there are those out there (like me) who are supportive and really enjoy motivating people. I am slow at responding on forums, but I do try to be as supportive as I can. Sometimes people just want to be blunt. Feel free to add me as a friend if you like and i will be one of those un-rude people there for you :)
  • amfmmama
    amfmmama Posts: 1,420 Member
    Sometimes all you want is information and you get one helpful post, and a lot of judgement. I get it. But, for the most part, I find people to be very helpful. Don't let it discourage you. This is a great site.
  • glockster972
    glockster972 Posts: 704 Member
    I suppose you don't think it's rude to call someone fat?
  • emilyajones
    emilyajones Posts: 56
    I hope im not rude, and if you feel like it, add me as a friend and ill help you best i can :)
  • ilissecrets
    ilissecrets Posts: 7
    Like everywhere in this world, you will find good and bad ppl..
  • Pocket_Pixi
    Pocket_Pixi Posts: 1,167 Member
    Welcome to the internet... and an open forum.

    This forum is generally mild compaired to others I have been on.
  • ashleydeane
    ashleydeane Posts: 50 Member
    oh i'm so sorry you have had a rude experience on here. I have had nothing but friendly comments from everyone... you should friend me :O) i'll encourage ya
  • dls06
    dls06 Posts: 6,774 Member
    People who do that are usually here because they are bored or think it's funny. We are not all like that. Just ignore them. :flowerforyou:
  • lisasdoinit
    lisasdoinit Posts: 216 Member
    actually, i was just telling my g/f last night this is the most friendly/ non judgemental online community i've ever encountered! sure there are trouble makers, and rude people and people who just want to fan the flames, attention seekers (ok yah a few really energetic attention seekers) but you find that everywhere in the world.

    some of the other sites over the years have been..BRUTAL. this place, pretty real so far!

    good luck!
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
    Define rude...

    I bet it doesn't match my definition of rude.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    Welcome to the internet.
    You+Must+Be+New+Here.jpg
  • bry_all01
    bry_all01 Posts: 3,100 Member
    I think calling someone, excuse me an entire thread of someone's fat on this site is about as low a blow as it gets, and is the rudest thing ever, in my opinion, of course. Others may think that is perfectly acceptable.
  • BeautifulScarsWECHANGED
    BeautifulScarsWECHANGED Posts: 749 Member
    Define rude...

    I bet it doesn't match my definition of rude.

    True story. LMAO!!
  • Tiffanydepiano
    Tiffanydepiano Posts: 169 Member
    I have found a lot of that too. It seems many people have a very narrow view of how to "get it done."
    There are some nice ones too but there are some that seem to be trolling for a place to attack.

    I hope your experience here improves. I have had a few disagreements but have met a lot of great people too.

    Good luck to you and hope you hand around for a while.
  • tsweetla
    tsweetla Posts: 6
    Maybe they are all hungry?
  • WhiteTonight
    WhiteTonight Posts: 22 Member
    I've encountered similar rudeness. Lots of condescension and one-upping going on. I try to keep to myself, and no longer look to other members for motivation. Sad fact.
  • ryan92408
    ryan92408 Posts: 11
    I think it's important to remember that a lot of emotion is lost through typing. While reading another persons post, we might be experiencing other emotional responses, totally unrelated, that we place onto the words that were typed by a person who maybe was trying to type an answer quickly before returning to work. . . or maybe they are having a bad day and feeling super discouraged . . . it's hard to say. The bottom line is, a lot is lost through written text. Things that you percieve by seeing someones face are lost in digital communication so it's important to take everything with a grain of salt. Hang in there - the journey is tough AND emotional. ;-)
  • WhiteTonight
    WhiteTonight Posts: 22 Member
    Maybe they are all hungry?

    Hahahaha. :laugh:
  • ReinasWrath
    ReinasWrath Posts: 1,173 Member
    Well maybe not everyone and no offense to you if your readin this and haven't been rude to anyone. But it just seems like alot of people are negative and not interested in motivating one another but instead interested in tearing them down.

    I posted a question about the show I Used to Be Fat, & I didn't once say I wanted to do what they did, but was just curious as to how they achieve such crazy results, as it took me about 6 months to lose 60 lbs, not 6 weeks like on the show, & I got some answers from people being very sarcastic, rude & talking to me in a condescending tone like I'm dumb for thinking I can do what they do when if they would've read my question they would've seen that I'm not interested in doing what they do, just curious how they do it.

    & I just went on the motivation&support section and a girl asked a question about how to lose 10lbs quickly and people were ripping her head off! A lot of the answers were so mean.

    I'm just curious does anyone else notice this? Why are people so mean and unsupportive on here? I thought this was a place to share success stories & get support from one another? Whats going on?


    wow I actually was the one who started the forum on that show! I didn't know anyone even responded! I'm sorry anyone was rude to you! Another coincidence was I think I know the 10lb forum you mentioned as well.
  • Jeneba
    Jeneba Posts: 699 Member
    I choose my words AND my friends.... very very carefully.... The rest of the people here on MFP are just behaving the way our CULTURE thinks is now acceptable.... It's pretty disgusting what passes for public civic discussion these days..... I am not a Republican, but I was saddened by the tone of the last debate. It seemed symptomatic to me of a larger overall trend toward trying to be the one who shouts loudest, insults deepest.... My advice? Post on your home page so that the people you trust will respond & create your own little world of NICE people.
  • MyCoachNYLA
    MyCoachNYLA Posts: 158 Member
    I agree, don't let it discourage you. There are so many awesome people on this site.

    Ones that want to support and help!!!
  • prettyinpink116
    prettyinpink116 Posts: 35 Member
    huh?
  • ilookthetype
    ilookthetype Posts: 3,021 Member
    I suppose you don't think it's rude to call someone fat?

    Define rude.

    I bet it doesn't match my definition.

    I second both of these.
  • _SusieQ_
    _SusieQ_ Posts: 2,964 Member
    Maybe they are all hungry?

    *WINNER*
  • Daniegirl2011
    Daniegirl2011 Posts: 13 Member
    I hear you my friend, I posted a general question & people responded as if I asked them to give me $1000. Jeez relax. On the other hand it's very infrequent. : )
  • kstw
    kstw Posts: 52 Member
    I can't answer for others on here but I always attempt to be supportive. There will be all kinds of answers on this site, some brutally honest, some nice, some incredibly helpful and yes, some rude.

    I have learned to just read over the answers and pay attention to those who are truly trying to be helpful. Maybe the 'rude' ones have had a bad day, cannot tolerate those of us who aren't as knowledgeable about weight loss as they, or maybe they are just rude people.

    My parents raised me long ago to treat others as I'd want to be treated so I continue to live by that rule. I do my exercises, eat my correct meals and occasionally look in to see how others are progressing. Trust me, the majority of people on here are just like you and me...trying to lose weight with a little support from friends.

    I wish you the best with your journey...
  • KLLever
    KLLever Posts: 39
    I know what you mean. And like you said, not everyone, but there is quite a bit of negativity in the forums. Thankfully, there are also amazingly supportive and tactful members. I think some people fail to understand (or to choose) the difference between assertive and aggressive. Oh, well. All I can do is continue to offer my positive support and ignore the less friendly interactions that sometimes go on...and on and on. Haha.
  • ╰☆╮PilatesPOPster╰☆╮
    ╰☆╮PilatesPOPster╰☆╮ Posts: 198
    some people may see it as rude. i think of it as bluntly honest (usually). yes im sure some on here get rude. but for the most part i really do think they're just being blunt.
    if they misunderstood your question- why let it get to you? brush it off and move on!
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