What are men's thoughts on stretchmarks?

hannahlbur
hannahlbur Posts: 221 Member
edited October 4 in Chit-Chat
I know someone who is doing internet dating. They were emailing a guy and planning to meet when he emails and asks her if she has stretchmarks as she has had a child and if so then he doesn't want to meet.

I've done internet dating myself and I know a lot of men on there treat it like they are ordering from a catalogue - they specify height, weight, body type, eye colour, hair colour etc. But stretchmarks really?
I'm just wondering what the thoughts are on this. I've never really heard men discussing stretchmarks but are they secretly thinking it and this guy had the bottle/stupidity to actually come out and say it? Is this really a turn off/deal breaker for most men? Even though they can get them too and most women have them and they aren't just caused by pregnancy but growth in puberty and weight changes.

This has really bothered me because I have them on my arms, chest and thighs and they aren't as dark and while not as noticeable as other people's they really bother me and I hate them. If men hate them too then that makes me feel even worse!

Even if I lose all the weight that I want to and get some confidence and hopefully become attractive and sexy...I will still have these stupid stretch marks. And probably still have cellulite. If men hate them too...then what?? The nunnery calls?!!

:mad:
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Replies

  • xinahay123
    xinahay123 Posts: 63
    Clearly, the guy was not worth meeting. What a complete jerk!
  • AppleADayAmber
    AppleADayAmber Posts: 69
    He just sounds like a jerk!! Any real MAN would not care about stretchmarks. especially if they are from childbearing. She is better off not ever knowing this boy!
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    Just because one person doesn't like them doesn't mean everyone will care about them. Different men have different preferences. They are just like people.
  • energythief
    energythief Posts: 2
    As a guy, I don't mind them at all.
  • xinahay123
    xinahay123 Posts: 63
    Confidence is sexy, so if you love yourself, stretch marks and all, there are plenty of men who will not even notice the stretch marks! No need for the nunnery!
  • PBJunkie
    PBJunkie Posts: 652
    Bad breath > stretch marks. Honestly any kind of scar or skin condition hardly bothers me, I dated a girl once that had keratosis pilaris on her arms and thighs, she felt so conscious about it that she never went out in public with shorts.
  • BrentGetsFit
    BrentGetsFit Posts: 878 Member
    They don't bother me in the least. That guy was either delusional or very insecure.
  • meeperoon
    meeperoon Posts: 270 Member
    Quite frankly, if a man is bothered by a little thing on the OUTSIDE such as stretchmarks then he really isn't worth bothering about.

    Everyone I've been with hasn't even mentioned them!

    If they can't get past the outside then they sure as hell won't get to know the inside! Lol (I mean personality of course...)
  • koosdel
    koosdel Posts: 3,317 Member
    I don't have a problem with stretch marks.

    Now gangly toe nails... yuck!
  • czechsmate
    czechsmate Posts: 556 Member
    Just because one person doesn't like them doesn't mean everyone will care about them. Different men have different preferences. They are just like people.

    lol...men are just like people :bigsmile:
  • gradgal01
    gradgal01 Posts: 46 Member
    Different men have different preferences. They are just like people.

    LOL.
  • zombiesama
    zombiesama Posts: 755 Member
    they don't bother me at all.

    and I have them too
  • hannahlbur
    hannahlbur Posts: 221 Member
    Confidence is sexy, so if you love yourself, stretch marks and all, there are plenty of men who will not even notice the stretch marks! No need for the nunnery!

    I hope you're right!
    And that I can get some confidence too!
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    Just because one person doesn't like them doesn't mean everyone will care about them. Different men have different preferences. They are just like people.

    To quote Katt Williams, "Stretch marks mean one of two things: either you were big and got small, or you were small and got big. Either way, we're f*ckin'!"
  • nettleboo
    nettleboo Posts: 177 Member
    my partner of six years says that they dont bother him why would they is what he said so not all men are like that.
  • NinjaTurtleDude
    NinjaTurtleDude Posts: 39
    Considering I have them so it don't bother me
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
    He sounds like a bit of a douche! Then again, at least he was honest about it from the start instead of dumping her later when he found out :/

    Seriously though, different people have different preferences and most guys out there really wont care. If you're happy and not bothered by them I doubt they will be. Most men seem to be more put off by lack of self confidence than the physical things you can't even control :)
  • STARSHINE1975
    STARSHINE1975 Posts: 168 Member
    I have a ton of stretch marks on my stomach and thighs from my pregnancy (19 years ago). Not a single man has ever had a problem with them. Mine have faded now and are silvery. One guy many years ago actually told me they looked cool because in the right light they looked like I was metal underneath. I'm a total Sci-fi nerd, so I felt like I was part machine. I loved it and never looked at them the same way again.

    That guy is superficial. He's going to be sadly disappointed when he ends up alone because the % of girls that fit into his cookie cutter mold is so low that his chances are slim. And he will be missing out on some amazing women in the meantime. Tell your friend not to be discourage and forget that loser there are plenty of deserving men out there.
  • hannahlbur
    hannahlbur Posts: 221 Member
    Bad breath > stretch marks. Honestly any kind of scar or skin condition hardly bothers me, I dated a girl once that had keratosis pilaris on her arms and thighs, she felt so conscious about it that she never went out in public with shorts.

    *reaches for mints* :laugh:

    I have a bit of KP on the tops of my arms too. Ok I'm not one of those people who has everything that anyone mentions - just these few things!
  • JsGirl93
    JsGirl93 Posts: 1,156
    He sounds absolutely shallow! Tell her to consider it a bullet dodged, she found out up front. That being said, all people have some sort of imperfection. I'm sure she could point one out on him for EACH stretchmark she has.
  • hannahlbur
    hannahlbur Posts: 221 Member
    Just because one person doesn't like them doesn't mean everyone will care about them. Different men have different preferences. They are just like people.

    To quote Katt Williams, "Stretch marks mean one of two things: either you were big and got small, or you were small and got big. Either way, we're f*ckin'!"

    :happy:
  • hannahlbur
    hannahlbur Posts: 221 Member
    I have a ton of stretch marks on my stomach and thighs from my pregnancy (19 years ago). Not a single man has ever had a problem with them. Mine have faded now and are silvery. One guy many years ago actually told me they looked cool because in the right light they looked like I was metal underneath. I'm a total Sci-fi nerd, so I felt like I was part machine. I loved it and never looked at them the same way again.

    That guy is superficial. He's going to be sadly disappointed when he ends up alone because the % of girls that fit into his cookie cutter mold is so low that his chances are slim. And he will be missing out on some amazing women in the meantime. Tell your friend not to be discourage and forget that loser there are plenty of deserving men out there.

    I've not heard them described as looking metallic before interesting :happy:

    I'm glad to hear that he seems to be in the minority on this one...
  • kristarablue
    kristarablue Posts: 702 Member
    ***finger crossed*** most men don't care otherwise ....convent here I come! But man oh man do I hate them on myself.
  • stormieweather
    stormieweather Posts: 2,549 Member
    And what happens when he finds his "un-stretchmarked" woman, they fall in love and have children? Chances are very high that she'll have some after that!


    My 16yr old daughter is so tiny she wears a size 00, is below the lowest percentile in growth and has always been very, very small. And yet, she has stretch marks on her inner thighs and love handle area. It's from normal growth spurts.

    Anybody who is that superficial is not worth a moment's time.
  • HMonsterX
    HMonsterX Posts: 3,000 Member
    Sad thing is I, maybe wrongly, assume ALL women will see my stretchmarks and that'll be it...phone calls stop, etc.

    Nice to see people say they don't care about them. But the thing is, most of us here some, or at least have some experience of them. People who have been slim all their lives probably wont, and will think the worst...
  • StarGeezer
    StarGeezer Posts: 351
    Tell "junior" there to stop getting his image of women from the pr0n sites, where they're all airbrushed and have make-up put on with a trowel. Real women have stretch marks, cellulite, curves, moles, etc. If he wants a trophy without blemishes, I hear they can be found if you're willing to inflate them yourself. What a jack hole. :laugh:
  • vanessaclarkgbr
    vanessaclarkgbr Posts: 731 Member
    Definitely did her a favour. What I think is, if they can't cope with a couple of stretch marks imagine what they'd be like if you ever got seriously ill or where in an accident - you wouldn't see them for dust. So, let's turn this around and say men (and women) like this are ok for a one night stand, but let's not show them any kind of commitment, it'd be wasted ;-)
  • vanessaclarkgbr
    vanessaclarkgbr Posts: 731 Member
    Sad thing is I, maybe wrongly, assume ALL women will see my stretchmarks and that'll be it...phone calls stop, etc.

    Nice to see people say they don't care about them. But the thing is, most of us here some, or at least have some experience of them. People who have been slim all their lives probably wont, and will think the worst...

    My partner's got some, so have I. To me, he's perfect :-)
  • foremant86
    foremant86 Posts: 1,115 Member
    Judging all men on the thoughts of one is ridiculous.

    Dude was obviously a shallow tool, tell your friend to brush it off and move on. chances are dude will die alone.
  • tmarie2715
    tmarie2715 Posts: 1,111 Member
    Tell "junior" there to stop getting his image of women from the pr0n sites, where they're all airbrushed and have make-up put on with a trowel. Real women have stretch marks, cellulite, curves, moles, etc. If he wants a trophy without blemishes, I hear they can be found if you're willing to inflate them yourself. What a jack hole. :laugh:

    Well said.
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