Heartbreak as motivation?

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miam4nia
miam4nia Posts: 137 Member
in Motivation and Support
Has anyone used heartbreak as motivation to change your life and feel better about yourself?
I've already started changing my life, but now that my heart just got broken I just don't feel like doing anything...
I've heard of people who have used break ups as a way to motivate themselves to change, and was wondering if anyone else did that?
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Replies

  • lee3978
    lee3978 Posts: 274
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    I trained for my first half marathon fueled by heartache and anger. F*cker pissed me off! Never said sorry but I ran!
  • lee3978
    lee3978 Posts: 274
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    Love is a battlefield and I want You to Know were on repeat! haha
  • mamamc03
    mamamc03 Posts: 1,067 Member
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    Now is the time to find yourself!! Reach inside and make yourself a better person! It's ok to grieve, but don't let yourself slip into bad habits! Take this chance to work really hard and focus your energy on yourself! It sucks getting your heart broken, but you can overcome this! You are ALMOST to your goal according to your ticker. You can make it!!
  • rachdlew
    rachdlew Posts: 108
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    Heartbreak could be a reason to start but for a long term change you will need better motivation. Your heart will not be broken forever and to continue with your change you will need to find another force to drive you like feeling better about who you are as aa person. I hate you have a broken heart and you can use it as motivation at first but it will not last unless ou find other motivation. I tried it and it worked great at first and when the heartbreak ended so did the life change.
  • Tennessee2019
    Tennessee2019 Posts: 676 Member
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    I have been in relationships that ended & I got the attitude of "I'll show him" which fueled my motivation, for awhile.
    The attitude & motivation didn't last & that is part of the reason I weigh what I weigh today.
    I have been married for going on 20 years & my husband loves me just how I am, but I don't.
    All it takes is for me to see myself in the mirror (or the virtual model you see below my moniker) to motivate me now.
  • jermyZ
    jermyZ Posts: 27
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    As much as I try not to admit it, every time I go running or working out, I find myself thinking about my previous heartbreak and it definitely fuels me far greater than anything else. For many reasons, it initially feels like I'm trying to prove her or everyone else, but I know I'm really proving it to myself.
  • _Sally_
    _Sally_ Posts: 514 Member
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    A successful life well lived is always the best revenge :smile:

    But seriously, whether or not you are in a relationship, we are always responsible for our own happiness and well being. You can use this as an opportunity to nurture yourself and not punish yourself. Treat yourself as you would treat your best friend who is going through this difficult time.

    You will come through the other side a happier person.
  • world2c
    world2c Posts: 178 Member
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    Yes - I was torn up yesterday and ran one of my fastest times on a 5 miler... Use the energy for good and use it to train... I think we all need to wallow a bit, especially after a heartbreak. If you need a few minutes down time, take it, but try not to let it steal your days and your energy.... You are worth more than that. If you can, take your workout outdoors, you'll be amazed at how much better you feel while walking or running... You can clear your head/be alone with your thoughts without taking it out on the ben and jerry's.... Big, big hug and good luck on your journey.
  • Southernsister
    Southernsister Posts: 198 Member
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    I found me again after a cheating man of 28 year walked away. I know who I am and that im way to good for the crap....he can eat my dust when I run by ....
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/350547-my-story-at-a-second-chance-at-life-photos
  • DBiggs23
    DBiggs23 Posts: 43
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    I have been in relationships that ended & I got the attitude of "I'll show him" which fueled my motivation, for awhile.
    The attitude & motivation didn't last & that is part of the reason I weigh what I weigh today.
    I have been married for going on 20 years & my husband loves me just how I am, but I don't.
    All it takes is for me to see myself in the mirror (or the virtual model you see below my moniker) to motivate me now.

    how did you develop that virtual model. that is really cool!

    Heartbreak can motivate for awhile. Its time to heal yourself and get healthy and feel better in the process. I would say this is the perfect time : ) you will then be in a habit and routine and continue long after you are all healed.
  • DustinReiner
    DustinReiner Posts: 157 Member
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    Yes, I have...many, many years ago! About the time I was your age......I totally changed my life, re-discovered myself and created a "New Me!"

    It was the best thing I ever did and it changed my life............That was some 22 years ago and how history repeats it self......the former girlfriend called me and wanted to rekindle things about 4 years ago.........I toyed witht he thought for a day or so, and then thought Ah, NO! Once was enough and my life WAS SO much better with out her!

    Actually I've had a few old girl friends come around again........I might of knocked boots with a couple of them, but nothing longer than that......I moved on, and it sure was nice having them call me!

    Ha, yea, so use this chance to become the person you really want to be and become it and don't look back!
  • Karabobarra
    Karabobarra Posts: 782 Member
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    I notice Jillian Michaels uses this in alot of her exercise videos for motivation, different kinds of heartbreak....being teased about being being fat, getting dumped or not being flirted with, you can use the anger to fuel the inner agression but I would be careful not to focus only on "making him have regrets" or "gettin even"...I think in the long run it is much healthier to focus on making the changes for you, so you love the person you are. Him having regrets should be a bonus, but not the ultimate goal, you deserve to make these changes and become healthier for you and only you...because you are worth it.
  • jazzy020106
    jazzy020106 Posts: 485 Member
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    I am the same way.. If I am down about something.. it makes me not want to do anything but mope and feel sorry for myself. BUT, even though its hard.. it is a great way to make yourself feel better.. go out there and better yourself and show that person who broke your heart what they are missing! Good luck and feel better soon!

    I just wanted to add that I have been there! It sucks and I am sorry you're dealing with it =[
  • OSUalum
    OSUalum Posts: 449 Member
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    I notice Jillian Michaels uses this in alot of her exercise videos for motivation, different kinds of heartbreak....being teased about being being fat, getting dumped or not being flirted with, you can use the anger to fuel the inner agression but I would be careful not to focus only on "making him have regrets" or "gettin even"...I think in the long run it is much healthier to focus on making the changes for you, so you love the person you are. Him having regrets should be a bonus, but not the ultimate goal, you deserve to make these changes and become healthier for you and only you...because you are worth it.

    Exactly!
    And all heartbreak isn't accompanied by anger. Sometimes sadness is just sadness. Loss is hard. Allow yourself time to emotional grieve while you're getting physical healthy. The two will join up in time.
    Be good to yourself. You can't change the past...but you can go into the future a thinner, healthier, happier person.
    Good luck.
  • 3ur3ka
    3ur3ka Posts: 230
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    Heartbreak could be a reason to start but for a long term change you will need better motivation. Your heart will not be broken forever and to continue with your change you will need to find another force to drive you like feeling better about who you are as aa person. I hate you have a broken heart and you can use it as motivation at first but it will not last unless ou find other motivation. I tried it and it worked great at first and when the heartbreak ended so did the life change.

    This was exactly what I thought.


    What would happen after you moved on? If you are going to do it, do it for yourself. Not just because you're bummed and bored.
  • JustEllieK
    JustEllieK Posts: 423 Member
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    Has anyone used heartbreak as motivation to change your life and feel better about yourself?
    I've already started changing my life, but now that my heart just got broken I just don't feel like doing anything...
    I've heard of people who have used break ups as a way to motivate themselves to change, and was wondering if anyone else did that?

    Yup i have done that....i wanted to look so hot that he regretted it! It does work...but if it doesn't work for you just find something else:)
  • miam4nia
    miam4nia Posts: 137 Member
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    Of course I'm doing this for me, I started doing this before when everything was good between us. But the idea of using the hurt to push myself even harder, even if its just for a little while, sounds like something I need....I just can't find the energy to do it :( and sometimes I just feel like..ugh
  • IamRachaelLea
    IamRachaelLea Posts: 10 Member
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    Hey there,
    It's sometimes one of the most motivating factors, at least for me. My best friend and I call it "negative=positive) taking something you're down about and fueling it to making something positive. Today actually, I sit here feeling angry over some guy...the same guy that got me on this workout kick in the first place. And while I'm tempted to overeat, I choose to work the hell out of my body. Use that energy of heartbreak and kick *kitten*! Good luck!
  • Kickbox9Bitch
    Kickbox9Bitch Posts: 16 Member
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    It can definitely help I have seen many people do it and succeed as in the past as an EFF U to my ex husband for the torture and pain he put me through I used that to motivate me but, would cry sometimes out of anger and feeling so powerful. I loved the song Fighter by Christina Aguilera, should listen to it. However, I also gained the weight back AND some :/ soooo here I am again but, the difference now it is FOR ME not for "revenge" and I am happy not negative that helps too.
  • buyonecash
    buyonecash Posts: 1
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    There was a girl who I cared about above all things. She meant everything to me. And when I found out I meant nothing to her, it crushed me. I first went into a depression. I know about the 5 stages of grief. When I went to the anger stage, I wasn't just angry, I was enraged. I would wake up angry and went to bed the same way. Exercise, I did insanity 1 to 3 times a day, and running were the only things I could do release some steam. I lost about 30 lbs in 3 months. Never underestimate the power of saying FU. A year later the intensity is gone but I still feel a slight sting now and again. My view is if you going feel angry and sad anyways you might as well redirect that energy and get something useful.

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