Someone please help
Replies
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Try to recognize when your thoughts are becoming destructive and unrealistic...then shift focus and remind yourself of something that has happened to make you feel good (like an NSV, for example).
Don't let it affect your relationships. Take a breath, and think before you speak, or just speak less in general. The things we say when we aren't feeling calm and rational can be alienating, rude, hateful, or just plain awkward. I used to drive people away because something was wrong with me on the inside. Now I realize that letting my inner neuroses out only pushed the real friends away.
DO:
reach out to friends and family
find ways to compliment others
appreciate beauty without jealousy
work on the things you want to improve (physically, emotionally, etc)
DONT:
complain about your appearance
post depressing *kitten* on facebook / twitter / etc
project your inner feelings onto other people
read into things that people do or say (speculating is the WORST)
Hope that helps.0 -
Try to recognize when your thoughts are becoming destructive and unrealistic...then shift focus and remind yourself of something that has happened to make you feel good (like an NSV, for example).
Don't let it affect your relationships. Take a breath, and think before you speak, or just speak less in general. The things we say when we aren't feeling calm and rational can be alienating, rude, hateful, or just plain awkward. I used to drive people away because something was wrong with me on the inside. Now I realize that letting my inner neuroses out only pushed the real friends away.
DO:
reach out to friends and family
find ways to compliment others
appreciate beauty without jealousy
work on the things you want to improve (physically, emotionally, etc)
DONT:
complain about your appearance
post depressing *kitten* on facebook / twitter / etc
project your inner feelings onto other people
read into things that people do or say (speculating is the WORST)
Hope that helps.
This helps alot! Thank you!0 -
DONT:
complain about your appearance
post depressing *kitten* on facebook / twitter / etc/ MyFitnessPal
This is great advice. You become what you think you are. ~ I added MFP0 -
I can relate, more so now than when I was 248 pounds. I come acrossed as a very happy, confident individual but I feel like I am dying inside and I am putting on a front for everyone else. I don't like feeling this way but it just comes at me out of nowhere and can last for a few minutes or a few days. I just try to be alone to work through it without people asking me if there is anything they can do to help. If there were I would have already asked for the help. I hope that you can adjust and find more days of happiness than bad ones.
JT0 -
I am not here fishing for compliments, I just want someone to understand.
I have low self-esteem and its becoming a real problem, affecting my relationships and the way I think. I wish I didn't feel like such a nut case or so abnormal, my boyfriend tries to understand but he can only do so much. I never normally let him know that I hurt or think I am not pretty but keeping it locked up inside hurts so I sometimes do let people know. I don't normally like that type of attention but I am asking for someone here who knows how I feel or used to.
I am not here to get advice on how I should diet or how much I should weigh or to tell me how beautiful I am or I should not feel that way, I am here looking for someone who can relate to me. I am breaking down and no body knows but you guys, please help.
I can only imagine just positng this was a big step for you. And .. I just want to say .. Good for you .. I for one, am glad that you reached out. You are on your way! The first step is always the worst.
I'm thinking you'll have lots of company here with people who can relate. WE all have imagery problems .. especially here on this particular forum. A lot of the reasons behind excess weight CAN be attributed to a lack of skills to cope with our everyday lives. THAT's why people with a common interest are drawn towards one and other...and this forum is focused on those exact issues.
This forum, typically rises above others due to it's consortum of people who can identify and offer kind words of understanding and support. After all .. this IS a support group. Do not take the other 'nay sayers' to heart. THEY obviously do not have the ability to truly understand how fragile some of our members are...or they just simply don't give a dam. THIS is not a place for ANYTHING dripping in sugar or candy coating .. I see evidence of much more honesty here, than that. This is a place where you CAN go, to find support and information .. and honesty (at least for the most part).
Now, between you and me .. Those people who post hurtful and condescending comments just for sake of being hurtful and condescending ... THEY are the ones who have a much worse problem.0 -
DONT:
complain about your appearance
post depressing *kitten* on facebook / twitter / etc/ MyFitnessPal
This is great advice. You become what you think you are. ~ I added MFP
In a perfect world maybe.0 -
Super low self esteem here, too. To the point where I try on pants and cry, get out of the shower and wrap a towel and realize it doesnt go all the way around anymore and get upset...my self esteem was higher when I was thin (and by thin I got too thin...anorexic-like thin) so I know its a mind set.
I was so skinny but would look in the mirror and still see the "fat" me. I know its not the weight, its deeper than that. But for me the weight makes it so much worse. SO much worse. Feel free to add me, I know what you're feeling....but I dont know how to get you (us) out of it. I hope that by just chatting with others here it will help. You all seem to know what its like too. Strength in numbers!!0 -
I just saw a FB post that made me think of you...
"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by *kitten* ~ William Gibson ~
It does make ya think!!0
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