does it bother anyone else...

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  • healthyliving_girl
    healthyliving_girl Posts: 290 Member
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    I have to admit that I never looked at many people's diaries. I was just happy to be supportive and say, "Good job" when they logged in their calories for the day. But recently, I looked at a couple diaries and was surprised to find some aren't eating the recommended MINIMUM 1200 calorie goal.

    To me, that's insane.....and I'd be a starving, crazy lunatic screaming at everyone here. But I'm not here to judge. I just don't look...because to be honest, I don't think my telling them that's wrong will help. Studies have proven that slow is better...and eating well is a part of it.

    It's scary though...when I realize how many people are eating so little...or so poorly. :(
  • YogiGirlLucy
    YogiGirlLucy Posts: 290
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    If one of my friends ate really healthy, but were under calorie goal, I would still say good job for making good food choices. If they ate processed foods or fast food, or something else bad, I probably wouldn't comment, or would comment on something else instead, just because I wouldn't encourage unhealthy eating. I might send a PM if the relationship supported it and I was concerned. I don't think I would expend the energy to be bothered by it though. Lots of other things to think about, and more positive things to focus on! :)

    It's not that easy for everyone to get up to their goal. I have no problem with it the week before TOM, but definitely struggle with it at other times. I still appreciate the support of my friends, and believe I am worthy of it. I would be very sad if no one ever commented just because I was under, despite trying my best to eat well.

    Lucy :)
  • LighterEachDay
    LighterEachDay Posts: 28
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    This is why I choose not to have friends on MFP. If you keep your diary private, people judge you. If you share it, people judge you. I get enough of that out in the world without having to deal with it on a weight loss website.

    I have a male friend, over 6 feet tall, who went from over 505 pounds to 230 pounds in less than 18 months, eating 1500 or less calories a day and NOT eating back his workout calories. Three years later, the weight is still off and he's never felt better. He mentioned once that it was really interesting how his physicians were nothing but supportive and enthusiastic about his success (even to the point of asking him to speak to other patients), but how often strangers would try to tell him "for his own good" that he was eating too few calories, not eating enough vegetables, basically not doing it "right".
  • bexdc
    bexdc Posts: 202 Member
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    If people want to make their food diaries private -- that is fine -- that is their prerogative. I just try to be as supportive as I can.
  • MîîśÊmÿłõü
    MîîśÊmÿłõü Posts: 285 Member
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    i agree and disagree. like for instance i was under my calorie goal yesterday, but i ate 3 solid meals , that were just low in calories, i was told im starving myself when that simple isnt true so i mean if you only ate one thing and you were under then yeh you could say that but if someone was just binging to get their daily average done
  • Kslice39
    Kslice39 Posts: 146
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    What bothers me is when some one has their food journal private and they finish logging for the day and it says they are under their calories for the day and people say good job.

    I honestly didn't know they could be set to private. How do you know if food journal is private or not? And if it is private how do you change it???
  • LighterEachDay
    LighterEachDay Posts: 28
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    Up at the top where it says "settings"... you can change settings for lots of things. And to make your blog private, click on "preferences" on your blog.
  • cassiejoyy
    cassiejoyy Posts: 82
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    Its more so that the same people who tell people that they did a great job, and they didn't even eat 1000 or even 800 calories that day are the same ones who when people ask about how many calories they should eat they really push the at least 1200 calories a day thing. It doesn't bother me that people eat less then that.
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
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    When people comment on someone's food diary telling them they did such a great job, but then you look at it, and they didn't even eat 1000 calories that day? & on the message boards everyone is always like YOU HAVE TO EAT AT LEAST 1200 calories!!!!!

    I don't know. Just kind of bothers me.

    Um....everyone is differnent and open to try whatever means they wish. What makes you so omnipotent that you KNOW 1200 is the MAGIC number? Everyone's body is different. Maybe they need 1800 or 800.

    If they are eating healthy choices and the intake is not high, yet their chemistry is good...then I say STFU. You are not a doc. You are not omnipotent. You are YOU. And that is not the AVERAGE.

    All things said...if its not healthy choices, then maybe they have an issue. But until you post that PHD...again, I say..STFU
  • cassiejoyy
    cassiejoyy Posts: 82
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    You can make it private, public, just friends, or you can make it have a password.
    Mine has a password on it, but if someone asked me for it, I give it to them.
    I just like to be in control of who can see it.
  • cassiejoyy
    cassiejoyy Posts: 82
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    When people comment on someone's food diary telling them they did such a great job, but then you look at it, and they didn't even eat 1000 calories that day? & on the message boards everyone is always like YOU HAVE TO EAT AT LEAST 1200 calories!!!!!

    I don't know. Just kind of bothers me.

    Um....everyone is differnent and open to try whatever means they wish. What makes you so omnipotent that you KNOW 1200 is the MAGIC number? Everyone's body is different. Maybe they need 1800 or 800.

    If they are eating healthy choices and the intake is not high, yet their chemistry is good...then I say STFU. You are not a doc. You are not omnipotent. You are YOU. And that is not the AVERAGE.

    All things said...if its not healthy choices, then maybe they have an issue. But until you post that PHD...again, I say..STFU

    Okay for one I didn't say it bothered me that people eat less then 1200 calories a day. I don't even eat that a day. What bothers me is that the same people who push the 1200 calories a day on people, are the same one who then tell people oh you did a great job!!!!!! Even though they ate like 500-700 calories. So maybe you should just STFU(:
  • LighterEachDay
    LighterEachDay Posts: 28
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    Sorry if we may have misunderstood you, but it seemed like you were pissed off that people were getting support when they shouldn't be getting support. If you're upset that people are hypocritical sometimes, well... yeah, it happens.
  • MîîśÊmÿłõü
    MîîśÊmÿłõü Posts: 285 Member
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    When people comment on someone's food diary telling them they did such a great job, but then you look at it, and they didn't even eat 1000 calories that day? & on the message boards everyone is always like YOU HAVE TO EAT AT LEAST 1200 calories!!!!!

    I don't know. Just kind of bothers me.

    Um....everyone is differnent and open to try whatever means they wish. What makes you so omnipotent that you KNOW 1200 is the MAGIC number? Everyone's body is different. Maybe they need 1800 or 800.

    If they are eating healthy choices and the intake is not high, yet their chemistry is good...then I say STFU. You are not a doc. You are not omnipotent. You are YOU. And that is not the AVERAGE.

    All things said...if its not healthy choices, then maybe they have an issue. But until you post that PHD...again, I say..STFU


    gosh thankyou for making some sense here!
  • KatieCuth
    KatieCuth Posts: 569 Member
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    We are all different Im always under and most of the time its healthy choices. I also dont weight my food so my logs are possibly a little incorrect. Im not going to weight my broccoli if I feel like eating lots of broccoli I eat it... '

    Why get so annoyed about such a thing...
  • ChristineandRoxy
    ChristineandRoxy Posts: 48 Member
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    Maybe the ppl commenting good job dont know any better themself isnt that how we all got fat in the first place from bad eating habits they probably think its good there eating so little because they just arent on the right track yet. And thats when your friends are suppose to come in and and help you on the right path so if it bothers you that your friends are eating so little or being congratulated on it say something isnt that why your there friend in the first place for support?
  • morganadk2_deleted
    morganadk2_deleted Posts: 1,696 Member
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    I agree and that's probably because those commenting don't look at the diaries. They just want to comment. I read each and every diary of my friends before I comment.

    Me too :flowerforyou:
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    I agree and that's probably because those commenting don't look at the diaries. They just want to comment. I read each and every diary of my friends before I comment.

    this. i only comment when i have looked and think its a good day.
  • dianeellen2
    dianeellen2 Posts: 259 Member
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    I could see that point, but also see the perspective that many here are here for the support. They took the time to focus on their goals and I dont have an issue giving an atta-boy for that at all! People are trying different things we may not always agree important to keep motivating each other...

    I agree - sometimes you can over think these things - many people are here to be supported and if that means giving them a 'high five' every now and again then so be it :smile:
  • elfy66
    elfy66 Posts: 138 Member
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    I've taken that bit off so it never says one way or the other. My diary is open to friends. I don't think I know more than anyone else on here, but I know that if I consistently eat below my calorie target I'm headachy, cold and feel unwell.

    One person when I 1st started was consistently under calories and ate an apple and a coffee for breakfast and lunch and not much else the whole day, she was also burning hundreds of calories. I couldn't find it in myself to say "good job" as I was very worried about her health.
  • Kslice39
    Kslice39 Posts: 146
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    Im not here to say one person is right over another but i feel, this is myself included, that weight loss is a journey. Its not all "cold turkey." ya know? Its hard to change habits you have maybe had for 10, 15,20 years or more and you cant just wake up one morning and say in done with them. It takes time, you didnt learn those bad habits over night and you are not going to lose them over night either. Maybe people are self conscious about themselves and do not want to be judged and just really need support right now? People are people and no two are the same. Maybe they didnt even know it was set to private!(I just found out by reading this post that it was even possible!). I dont know, i guess all i am saying is dont judge a book by its cover until you know the whole story. People are here looking for support from one another :) at least i am and i would be crushed if someone said something negative because a lot of us are in a fragile and vulnerable state right now :)...Love, support, motivation, and encourage :) You all have a BEAUTIFUL day!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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