Shallow Observation

holzjw1482
holzjw1482 Posts: 120 Member
edited October 4 in Chit-Chat
Firstly, I'll admit that whenever I see a before and after pic post on the forums I have to open it. I'm trying to figure out a way to say this without being condescending (I already know it's shallow) but I've noticed that a lot of times you will see someone's before picture that is kind of homely, for lack of a kinder term, and then the after picture they look really attractive. Not like that's a shocker to anyone, but I've used it as motivation. Besides the more important reason of your health it's still a good motivator. I used to joke back if someone commented on my weight that "Oh yeah, well I can diet, but you can't lose ugly". Truth is from everything I've seen on MFP you can lose ugly, no offense to anyone because I don't consider myself to be a looker either.
«1

Replies

  • mleoni092708
    mleoni092708 Posts: 629 Member
    I think I get what you are trying to say. Some before pics are just ok but the after ones are stunning. I'm working on my stunning pics :tongue:
  • ronda_gettinghealthy
    ronda_gettinghealthy Posts: 777 Member
    well after I had lost about 30 pounds people were asking if I had had botox done...so wt loss and good health can make you look a lot younger...dont know about "easier on the eyes" though
  • adjones5
    adjones5 Posts: 938 Member
    Confidence is sexy. You can lose "ugly"
  • MarieNevada
    MarieNevada Posts: 395 Member
    what you are seeing is what self-confidence does to a person. there is nothing so beautiful on a person as self-confidence.
  • bry_all01
    bry_all01 Posts: 3,100 Member
    This actually makes sense... except, an "ugly" person usually means who they are on the inside. Even pretty people can be ugly when they open their mouth.
  • Iamfit4life
    Iamfit4life Posts: 3,095 Member
    I'm going to find the kindest possible way to say this.


    I think often when people are overweight they aren't treating their body properly. Therefore they look tired, worn down.
    This I think is what I think you are referring to as "ugly".
  • JThomas61
    JThomas61 Posts: 892
    It might just be that when the person is heavy they aren't smiley and don't look approachable, but after they lose the weight their whole lifestyle tends to change and they smile a lot. It happened to me. Just my opinion!
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,452 Member
    yeah when people are more confident and feeling excited about their looks and progress, they tend to put more effort into the whole package - clothes, hair, makeup, etc.
  • dragonbait0126
    dragonbait0126 Posts: 568 Member
    bahaha! I for one am totally not offended but know exactly what you are saying. I don't think it's so much a matter of losing ugly though as gaining self-confidence and therefore presenting ourselves in a different manner. The more weight we lose the more we feel better about ourselves and start wearing things that draw more attention to ourselves. Not that anyone is yelling out loud "hey look at me" but we want others to notice our accomplishments and whether we realize it or not we present ourselves in a way that either makes us less attractive because we are not comfortable with ourselves and then through personal growth and progress make changes in our presentation and therefore become "less ugly" to ourselves and others. Good grief I hope that makes sense!
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    I agree that a lot of it is their new confidence. Another factor is that when you're healthy your skin, hair, eyes, everything looks better.
  • TashaS
    TashaS Posts: 199 Member
    I get it - I totally get it... I'm addicted to before and after photos; makes me want to work hard for my own. I used MFP a couple years ago to loose 52lbs. I felt fantastic and like I had lost "my ugly!" Two years and two babies later I'm struggling to find the drive and commitment I had back then - my shallow observations help me to keep plugging along.
  • jtbaddison
    jtbaddison Posts: 134 Member
    I agree totally with your observation.
  • p0pr0cksnc0ke
    p0pr0cksnc0ke Posts: 1,283 Member
    My response to this is not nearly as civil as everyone else. I would get not only a warning, but probably a ban.
  • sandrinamsilva
    sandrinamsilva Posts: 651 Member
    It might just be that when the person is heavy they aren't smiley and don't look approachable, but after they lose the weight their whole lifestyle tends to change and they smile a lot. It happened to me. Just my opinion!

    Totally agree. I am told I glow now.
  • drog2323
    drog2323 Posts: 1,343 Member
    This actually makes sense... except, an "ugly" person usually means who they are on the inside. Even pretty people can be ugly when they open their mouth.

    this.
  • jr1985
    jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
    I think a lot of it though has to do with how they present themselves... In the 'Before's' people are already trying to avoid attention, and probably less concerned with how they look... Not just with weight, but overall appearance... Some days I too fall into that trap of, Well I'll still be fat regardless, so what does it matter what I look like... Will wear sweatpants, no make up, etc.

    But in the afters, people take pride in how they look, they smile a little brighter, stand up a little taller, generally are in nice clothes and make up... Confidence is actually about the most attractive thing a person can have, regardless of how much they weigh... If they felt and looked confident in the before pictures, then I'm guessing they would have been attractive in them too regardless of how much they weighed.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    I'm going to find the kindest possible way to say this.


    I think often when people are overweight they aren't treating their body properly. Therefore they look tired, worn down.
    This I think is what I think you are referring to as "ugly".

    This. It's not ugly - it's a lack of care for oneself. .. which, I mean, in itself is unattractive... but it's not 'ugly' ... When I was my largest, I actually tried to make myself look as unattractive as possible. I hid behind the guise of being 'quirky and unique' .. but really it was a way to take the focus off my weight and health problems. The better I feel and the more fit I am, the more I want to let the beautiful person inside shine through. I'm basically the hottest *kitten* ever on the inside, and I finally feel like I deserve to be the hottest *kitten* ever on the outside too.
  • holzjw1482
    holzjw1482 Posts: 120 Member
    My response to this is not nearly as civil as everyone else. I would get not only a warning, but probably a ban.

    Ha! Send me a message then because I'm totally curious and I love uncivility (not sure if that's a word)
  • jacksonpt
    jacksonpt Posts: 10,413 Member
    I'm going to find the kindest possible way to say this.


    I think often when people are overweight they aren't treating their body properly. Therefore they look tired, worn down.
    This I think is what I think you are referring to as "ugly".

    I've noticed this as well, and to take it one step farther (further?), often times they seem to not care about how they look. Hair looks like they just got out of bed, a smile no where to be found.... But then in the after pic, they are showered, primped, smiling and happy.

    To some extent I get it... who isn't happier the closer they get to their goals? But at the same token, is life really THAT miserable?
  • jayliospecky
    jayliospecky Posts: 25,022 Member
    Counterpoint: I have also seen a few "after" pics that do not look so good. Some people have dark shadows under their eyes and look kind of hollow. I suspect these people are either lacking specific nutrients or maybe have other lifestyle habits that show in their faces. Some other "after" pics I find it difficult to compliment are if the women (not to pick on anyone here) have lost all this weight and feel the need to show as much of their body to the world as possible. I get that they are thrilled to wear certain types of clothes that they felt they couldn't before, but there are some outfits that nobody should wear. You can look amazing without showing the whole world your business.

    Just my personal opinion. I don't lose sleep over it or anything.
  • sassylilmama
    sassylilmama Posts: 1,493 Member
    I get your point here. For me though when I said that phrase I meant they had an ugly personality.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    This actually makes sense... except, an "ugly" person usually means who they are on the inside. Even pretty people can be ugly when they open their mouth.
    No, when you're looking at photos, "ugly" does not refer to the personality. Would you like it better if it were a different word? How about "unattractive"? "Less attractive"? Do we really have to get bogged down in this? You know very well what he is saying.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    People can look a lot different in the face after losing a lot of weight. When you carry a lot of fat in your face, your facial structure is totally hidden. Lose that, and you gain a visible jawline, cheekbones, etc. That makes anyone more attractive.

    But I agree that people who are truly fat tend to look the way they feel, and that has a lot to do with the change in their appearance when they lose weight.
  • Uerzer
    Uerzer Posts: 273
    I think we need a Before - After Pic Database (BAPD) :bigsmile: Just for general motivation and new guys XD

    What do you think? anyone knows how could we do it? :bigsmile:
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
    Fat people are funny.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
    And people just aren't overly excited to take "before" pictures. I know I wasn't. I didn't even take any (except for clothed) after my last pregnancy. "Yeah, I'm fat, and I'm taking photos in my underwear. Exciting." Then in the after ones I'll smile, wear makeup, make sure my hair is clean, etc....
  • tkn11
    tkn11 Posts: 276 Member
    bump
  • bry_all01
    bry_all01 Posts: 3,100 Member
    This actually makes sense... except, an "ugly" person usually means who they are on the inside. Even pretty people can be ugly when they open their mouth.
    No, when you're looking at photos, "ugly" does not refer to the personality. Would you like it better if it were a different word? How about "unattractive"? "Less attractive"? Do we really have to get bogged down in this? You know very well what he is saying.

    Actually, OP said "Oh yeah, well I can diet, but you can't lose ugly". That is a phrase people often use to retort when someone calls them fat. Therefore, said "fat" person then retorts "Oh yeah, well I can diet, but you can't lose ugly". Therefore, said "ugly" person COULD have been a good looking person with a nasty attitude, like calling anyone fat, for instance. :flowerforyou:
  • writtenINthestars
    writtenINthestars Posts: 1,933 Member
    Confidence is sexy. You can lose "ugly"

    THIS! =)
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
    Nothing tastes as bad as ugly feels! :drinker:
This discussion has been closed.

Categories