Ever worry what your partner thinks?

When I met my fiance I was about 45-50 lbs heavier. He absolutely loved my body because he's very into curvy, voluptuous women... especially very large breasts. Since I lost a fair amount of weight, my boobs have gotten smaller. I am still very curvacious and have plenty of jiggly bits, but my partner's comments and behaviors lead me to believe that he wishes I still looked the way I did when we met.

Do any of you have a similar challenge you're facing? It's been really difficult trying to achieve this goal that's so important to my health and well being while simultaneously worrying if my fiance will still be attracted to me, or at least want me the way he did before. As hard as I've been working, his opinions have been in the back of my mind and I'm afraid they might be hindering my progress.

Share your thoughts. I'd love some empathy.

Do it for yourself. That's more important than someone else's opinion of you. Fiance or not.

i know my husband likes bigger girls..but at this point im still bigger than when we met. he has told me hes proud of me and says i still look good. he doesnt want me to get super skinny, but i dont want that either so its all good.

Just be straight forward with him and ask...Tell him why you are doing it?

I agree. If you guys are getting married you need to learn to be open and honest and communicate effectively. If something is bothering him, ask him what it is. Sit down and talk it out. He might not like the thinner you as mcuh, but he still loves you and he's got to understand that this is better for your health, your self confidence, etc. He'll get over it.

Ya Health Come First!

You can still have all the curves he loves, just a smaller less flabby version lol. Remember this is about you not him, you want to love how you look after all you have to look at yourself in the mirror not him. Good luck with your journey!!!!!!!!!!!!

If he really loves you, he will understand that you are doing this for your health. If you plan to have children, you will be a healthier, more energetic mother. Is there a possibility he has fears that your weight loss will get you more attention from other guys? If he cannot handle your being healthy, perhaps he is not "the one." I hope I'm not being too brutally honest, but I am trying to provide options for your thought and consideration. Make it clear. "This is for me and our future."

I agree with this...

When I start to worry about this too much, I try to think of it from his perspective. In other words, how would you feel if it were him changing from the way he was when you were first attracted to him? If you'd still love him completely and still want to be with him-- there's a pretty good chance he'd feel the same way. Our bodies are going to change over the years-- maybe for the better, maybe not so much. Hopefully it's more than just your body that he's after!

My first husband was always wanting me to stay at a higher weight. He did not like when I lost any. I know for him it was because he was afraid to lose me. He was extremely jealous and had issues with it. He helped me get up to 350 that way. He was an enabler in the worst way. But in the end it was my choice and I had to make it for me.
Maybe just sit him down and talk with him. Tell him how important this is to you and ask for his support. Maybe let him know that you love him no matter what you look at and you think you need to do this for yourself.
Big hugs!!

I think everyone struggles with wanting to please another person at times. The trouble comes in when we become dependent on another person's approval. I dealt with this quite a bit with my husband. I gained almost a hundred pounds after we met, and I figured he didn't find me beautiful any more, but he assured me that he did. But, I noticed that whenever I would go on a diet, or we would start a diet together, it seemed like he quickly sabotaged the plan with dinners out or other types of foods that we weren't supposed to be eating. A few months ago, I decided enough was enough. I told him politely that I was going to lose the weight and that he couldn't do anything to stop me. I swear he tries every now and then. He'll say something like, "I enJOY MY life," and I will reply, "That's great, Hon, but I'm miserable and I need it to change." I don't really know what he thinks about it, but I'm passed the point where making him happy trumps making me happy. Honestly, even if he told me, "One more pound and we're over." I would just give him a hug, tell him I love him no matter what, and drive out to the gym. I think it's especially important as women that we never, EVER let anyone dictate to us our behaviors toward ourselves. Having come out of an abusive marriage a number of years ago has taught me that peace with myself is more important (and more sustainable) than making anyone else happy on this earth.

I wish you all the best!! Be true to yourself.

My BF has always told me he loves my hips, butt and breasts and when I started losing weight told me "not to get too skinny, please."

That was nearly 8 months ago and now that I'm 20 pounds less, I think he sees how definition makes me look shapelier, the muscles make the hips and butt firmer and the smaller waist makes my breasts which were a DD and are now a D appear bigger than they were.

Also, he thinks my gym clothes make me look hot.

Suffice it to say, he is no longer afraid of me getting too skinny. He's realized that when I have body idols in women like Tina Turner (OMG those LEGS!) that I'm not gonna try to be a Kate Moss.