friend driving me crazy what would you do?

Don't give her the attention she's seeking. She'll stop.

Sounds to me like she's lonely and very excited to have found you as a friend.

Just keep ignoring the calls and she will eventually stop - but then don't spend time with her because she will think you are BFF's again & start all over...

Cut her loose, unless you want to babysit her when she is bored. LIfe is too short!

So... I have a friend who does the same- when I dont answer he calls and calls and calls and then blows up my phone w texts. I have learned its not me, its just him, he is assuming I dont hear the phone ringing, which I never do- but thats besides the point, and it used to drive me nuts too. Its sort of about training - and I'm sorry to phrase it that way- but your friend needs to learn that you will respond to her when you have a chance- just not immediatly, and some people- have it sort of programmed in their heads than when the phone rings- you have to stop and answer it- maybe bc she is a mom- thats her thinking, she probably is used to having to answer phone asap bc it might be an issue w her child.

I know its hard to deal with this one- but its a trust thing on her side- and a patience thing on yours. I would NOT get in the habit of dropping what you're doing to answer tho- bc that will confirm it for her.

I got one of those - they think I'm made at them if I don't reply, reguardless of what I'm doing. And then after 10 mins of not hearing from me they end up flipping it around and get mad at me saying things like "fine ignore me then" or then I get the guilt trip in return...so imature. I laugh about it when I talk to them and tell them to stop being so weird. Honesty is the best remedy

Just tell them its annoying. If they dont stop then they are not really a friend.

So I have a friend, now we are not close friends. She is kind of one of those people that you like to hang out with but after too long she really gets on your nerves. She is a very nice person and a single mom so I like to cut her some slack and I don't want to be mean but this woman really pisses me off sometimes. For example this weekend we hung out and had some drinks. The next day she called me, I didn't answer because I was busy doing something with my hands. She called again literally right after that. Now I don't answer cause I know what she is doing. Then she texts me what u doing? Then she calls again right after that. So 3 phone calls and a text within 15 minutes. So I text her back what's wrong? Obviously there is something wrong if you called me that much within that amount of time ( Who the F does that?) No nothing just kidless and bored. Man I was so pissed I was ready to bite her head off. I told her not to do that anymore because it makes me think something is wrong. She said "sorry" that was it just a sorry and then 20 minutes later texted me again trying to blame it on her brand new iphone. Problem is she has done this before with her old phone and her home phone, she obvioulsy has a real problem with phones...yeah right. What should I do, I am tired of telling her not to do that and it's getting to the point where I am going to blow up on her. I am 28 I shouldn't have to be schooling a 50 year old on phone etiquette. Whats the right way to handle this situation? What would you do?

I think you already did the right thing, emmy, being upfront with her. Voice your feelings and if she does not respect your wishes then you have a reason to back off. You rock and she loves you, you could have a worse problem LOL

I had sort of a similar situation but with a childhood friend. Over the years as we grew up our interests changed, we began doing our own things and went our separate ways. I was fine with that however, she is the type of person who has to be "all up in your business" at all times. We are not close friends but see each other maybe once a year or every two years. I really do not like seeing this person more than that because she really has not grown up, still acts like she is in high school and we have absolutely nothing in common. Seeing her once every year or so is more than enough for me, I could not handle seeing her on a regular basis. Recently, this person had a baby and I was invited to the baby shower. I did not want to go because I really don't have anything in common with her friends and sitting with a bunch of strangers on my day off is not my ideal of fun. Instead, I declined the invite and sent a gift to be polite. Well since then this person has been "up my butt". I started getting constant text messages, emails, and facebook messages prying into my personal life. I am not talking about your typical "Hi, how are you? Would you like to meet for lunch or coffee?" messages. They were "What kind of work are you doing to your house?", "Where are you working?", "Are you subbing? Where are you subbing", "Who did you hang out with today?", "I see so and so posted on your wall. Do you hang out with them?". The questions usually related to pictures or statuses I posted on FB and messages my friends left me on FB. Her messages were inappropriate and creepy considering we were not good friends at all. Eventually this person began to harass friends of mine when they commented on my status and began cyber stalking not only me but people I am friends with. Sadly, this person has a past history of harassing and stalking people. I never thought in a million years she would pull that crap with me, but I was wrong. :noway: Since then I had not choice but to cut all ties with her. :grumble:

In your case, I think you are doing everything right. You have confronted her about contacting you way too much and been upfront with her. It sounds like she thinks of you as a close friend if she is contacting you that much. It also sounds like she is extremely bored and desperate for adult contact. In a way, I feel sorry for her. BUT at the same time, I completely understand where you are coming from. My only suggestion is remind her that the constant phone calls one right after another and text messages is viewed by you as harassment. Maybe let her know if she keeps it up that you will no longer be able to carry on a friendship with her.

Best of luck to you.

Doesn't sound like she is really a friend. I have buddies that I don't see often and when I do make plans with them I have to make sure other people are going as well because one gets clingy and the other flakes 99% of the time. Basically over the years I just learned what to expect from them and how to avoid it - by inviting other people.

I would suggest letting life take you your separate ways or if you do really enjoy this person (except for the clingy part) inviting others along with you next time so she can't latch on. Plus you may introduce her to a new friend that totally doesn't mind if she calls them so much!

Well, if she is a friend you can talk to her and get your point across.

If she is not a friend you may have to cut off ties with her if the thing between her ears do not comprehend boundaries.

However there is a possibility that:

1. It is only a problem if you make it a problem

2. You can put the phone on buzz if the ringing is annoying you and place a humorous voice mail message to perhaps enlighten her and others

3. You can ignore texts and with caller ID you can choose who to answer calls from or not

4. In the whole scheme of life it really doesn't matter

5. Last, don't worry be happy

You can explain to her that if you don't answer the first time, there is a reason and to please be patient with you and wait for a call back. I have had to do this with people before and it is very frustrating and annoying. She is putting her immediate needs over whatever you are doing. If she doesn't get this after you discuss it with her, start sending her calls to vm and she will get the hint.

This sounds like a mature approach, that might both improve and preserve the relationship.

This is why I am anti-cell phone. I have always, even as a teenager, disliked talking on the phone. I just have not been able to buy into the over the top technology that a cell phone brings (and the privacy they take away!) My life isn't super-crazy-busy, so I don't need an iphone to make sure everyone and anyone can contact me at any time. I have a cell phone for the every-so-often I need to call or text someone, or for emerencies. I cannot sit and text an entire conversation to someone - I think it's crazy. I just let people know this, and most of my friends and family know that if they call, if I'm not around to pick up, they'll leave a message and I'll get back to them when I can. If it's an emergency, then they'll call my cell. I would just tell her this. If she doesn't stop, then give her the boot - then you know she's just desperate for attention.

Well, I don't think avoiding the issue is necessarily the answer. Having a sincere conversation with her could not only help relieve the irritating issue with you but it could also help her with other people who may not like confrontation. Doing so could ultimately lead to a win-win for all...meaning she will no longer irritate you OR other friends and end up with more people to talk to. She may have a few things against her, for example - trust, insecurities, as well as respect and boundary issues. She is not your #1 priority, nor should she be. She is your friend and you will call her back when you have the time to dedicate to her. Try selling it like that, "I will return your call. I do want to talk to you but I can't drop everything each time the phone rings. Not only when you call but when others do as well. Have a little faith." If she's doing this with you, she's doing it with others and probably alienating herself from them as a result!