How did you know?

daffodilsoup
daffodilsoup Posts: 1,972 Member
edited October 5 in Chit-Chat
My boyfriend and I met at work a few years ago. We instantly hit it off as friends, started dating early this year, and are keeping things alive while I finish off a half-year internship teaching in China (we are 4.5/6 months down, and counting down the days til we are reunited). We were able to date "in real life" for a few months before I moved here, and I return home on January 6, 2012.

For my whole life (usually after messy breakups), my relatives have all told me that "when you know, you just know." Despite the current distance, this is the first time that I truly feel like I "just know". We still have a lot of connecting to do and experiences to share together, but as cliche as it sounds, I've "known" that he is that person since the day we met. I think the most telltale sign for me is that in all my other relationships, it was "oh god, I just can't live without you!" But with Curtis it's more of "I could live without you if I had to, but my life feels so much more full with you in it."

So since I'm feeling a little warm and fuzzy, I want to know - married/long-time partners of MFP, how did you "know"? The sappier, the better :)

Replies

  • PBJunky
    PBJunky Posts: 737 Member
    If it is a gut feeling then it is likely to be true
  • hazelnut861
    hazelnut861 Posts: 390 Member
    I couldn't imagine my life without him. Sadly I can now.
  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
    The moment that I realized that I couldn't live without him....
  • 21karensmith
    21karensmith Posts: 50 Member
    When I realized it didn't matter where he was, I wanted to be with him 4ever:heart:
  • jenniferhe
    jenniferhe Posts: 52 Member
    While dating my husband & I were apart for about 4-5 months while I did a semester over seas. During that time we actually broke up b/c our communcation was horrible & we struggled doing long distance. When I came back we talked alot and the time apart helped us both realize where we were selfish and needed to work inorder to make the relationship stick. After about 3 months of being back and acutally getting back together, he asked me to marry him. We went through a year of marriage counseling and got married after graduating from college. :) This December we will be married 5 1/2 years. I think I knew it was going to be him after I got back from my semester abroad because he persued me and continued to want to work things out. He easily could have walked away and choose not to. We've had our ups and downs. Actually going through one of our downs right now, but again I've seen where in small ways he's still pushing through and mutally working towards getting things straightened out.

    You right there are the warm fuzzy feelings. May be ask your self if in the hard times you are willing to still see the good willed man he is & can see your selves working through it. I wish you all the best :)
  • Dexy_
    Dexy_ Posts: 593 Member
    I met my partner on World of Warcraft (LOL I know!). He lived in another state about 15hours away. He came up to meet me for about 2 weeks and went back home. Within 3 days I was on the phone crying telling him he had to come back! Skip ahead a few years and we have 2 kids and are engaged, couldn't be happier!

    I agree with a previous poster, where you can't live without them! :)
  • Debbe2
    Debbe2 Posts: 2,071 Member
    I believe it's true. When I knew, I knew he would be a great life partner and my best friend. He felt the same. Started dating after being friends first and married within 2 1/2 years. We've been married 28 years. Been thru much together and can always depend on each other for strength and support. Message is to have fun, be friends, trustworthy, loyal, dependable. Not always going to be easy times but staying together is always our best option. Can't imagine life with anyone else. Love my husband and know i'm blessed. :love:
  • Kym1610
    Kym1610 Posts: 328 Member
    When your life is fuller just because he is apart of it and you can sit down together and have a converasation with out really talking at all.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    I always tell people that if it's meant to be, it works. It's not to say that marriage and relationships aren't hard work, but you and your partner are willing to put that work into the relationship, which in many ways, make it easy.

    For me, being with my husband just feels natural and easy for me. We just mesh well. A lot of my other relationships before him were a lot of work to maintain. In hindsight, I realized I wanted it to work more than they did.

    Sounds like you got yourself a great relationship, but be patient and don't rush into anything. If he is the right one for you, there's no rush.
  • Pengygirl24
    Pengygirl24 Posts: 34
    My Fiance and I met, well, on the internet. We talked for three months then finally met. When we met, I thought 'Hey, he is as amazing in real life as he is on the phone!' We fell in love, and have been through a lot of stuff together, and I just can't see myself with anyone else. The thought hasn't even crossed my mind. We have been together for 11Months and 4Days. We got Engaged 2Months ago, and are planning our Wedding! (Like you said) I just know <3
  • sagetracey
    sagetracey Posts: 607 Member
    When I found myself wanting to hear all about his day and I was saving up my newsy bits to tell him - all this in the days before mobile phones and internet.

    we have married more than 27 years and are best friends and More in love than ever.
  • jarrettd
    jarrettd Posts: 872 Member
    When he put his arms around me, I felt like I had come home. I had known him 2 weeks at that point; we were married a month later. That was 26 years ago. It's true...sometimes you just know.
  • Eleanorjanethinner
    Eleanorjanethinner Posts: 563 Member
    After a crappy father, I had a wee mental list of qualities I wanted in a husband.

    I got together with my husband after being friends for a bit and we were 'dating' for 8 years (16 - 24) and have been married for nearly 11. We just stayed together and stayed together and still enjoyed spending time together and it became clear that we're two halves of the same whole.

    To me a good relationship takes:

    * Commitment - you will work yourself to death before giving up and splitting.
    * Communication - talk (and more importantly, listen actively).
    * Respect and caring (research says contempt is the death of a relationship). Continuing to show affection and do things things for each other.
    *Change and compromise!
    * Equal contributions of effort to the business of being a couple (including money, childcare, chores etc.).

    In my opinion it's not:

    * about 'butterflies in the tummy' romantic feelings (long term - they're nice to start with, but generally don't last).
    * about finding an 'ideal' person. I think a partner can't help but drive you crazy sometimes.
    * about being happy together 100% of the time.


    That'll do for my two cents...

    PS - I feel incredibly blessed in my husband!
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