Ashamed

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  • mscoco10
    mscoco10 Posts: 527 Member
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    It really bugs me how some men think we as women should look like super models but they don't adhere to the same standard. I've never been skinny and i dont wish to be. I just wanna be healthy. For him to say he was ashmed was wrong. We as women already have to deal with other people and the media. Your partner should be supportive. Don't worry or feel down. Don't let the devil steal your joy. We all have issues with weight. Don't stress over gaining a few pounds. It happens. You have the tools to keep the weight under control. You deserve true unconditional love. His comments should come from a i love you and want the best life for you. I pray God will heal your heart b/c once words are expressed its to late to back track. The damage is done.
  • rb16fitness
    rb16fitness Posts: 236 Member
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    Your husband should have phrased his emotions more tactfully, he was unnecessarily callous. However, people cannot force themselves to be attracted to someone when they are not. Though you can still love someone without being physically attracted to them. Thankfully, it sounds like the attraction has returned...
    (sometimes its best not to ask the question if you don't want to know the true answer... )
  • vegansara
    vegansara Posts: 192 Member
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    I think there have been a lot of good responses on here so far.

    What struck me the most is the comment that he would divorce you if you gained weight. That, my friend, is conditional love and is no way to live your life. Bottom line (for me).

    My advice, to take or leave: Ask him about it, give him the chance to clarify his feelings. If that is the way he really feels, he has every right to feel that way - and you have every right to have your feelings too. Maybe he didn't mean it, maybe he did, but the only way to find out is to ask him.
  • dlaplume2
    dlaplume2 Posts: 1,658 Member
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    I know it's hard to have that kind of heart to heart, but look back and analyz it from a different perspective, now that you have had time to stew it over a bit.

    Look at your personality then and as it is now.

    Your husband may have been a littl ashamed to be seen with you because you were a overweight, but was it weight, or maybe you weren't as diligent about you apperance. Maybe you were sloppier, or in a depressed state and not as out going as you are now. People rub off on each other and maybe those things have been a contributing factor of that lost love feelings, both ways.

    just a thought.

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