I'm a failure...again!

Dangerously15
Dangerously15 Posts: 31
edited October 5 in Motivation and Support
A little background, I'm not supposed to have lactose, wheat, gluten, and sugar. I've been doing a great job eating right and losing weight little by little (again might I add), but yesterday I liderally STUFFED my face with pancake type things I made with peanut butter ontop, fatty roast beef with mayonaise, and all kinds of other stuff. I felt TERRIBLE, physically and emotionally. I decided that today was going to be different, and that was that. So today I was counting my calories well again and everything was going ok (exept for yesterday of course). Then I decided to go into the kitchen and stuff my face some more, with of course more things I can't be having! I'm always failing like this, but this time was one of the worst! Now I don't know what to do.

Replies

  • EmiliaWhite
    EmiliaWhite Posts: 19
    You have to be able to forgive yourself. These kind of days are going to happen, because you're human! We all are :) I know it is extremely difficult, but this is a process - there are going to be streaks where you're totally on target and winning, and there are going to be days when you slip. The goal is to make the winning outweigh the slips, and love yourself enough to forgive yourself when less than perfect days happen :)

    You CAN do this! :)
  • lloydrt
    lloydrt Posts: 1,121 Member
    , been there done that but Im still here and working on getting it right..............we slip, we fall, we get back up and dont look back


    Ive lost and Im where I want to be, but I have had days, just like you, but I didnt throw in the towel, I just got back up, and looked forward........it happens to all of us. Thats why you get help and support from people who have been there and done that

    tomorrow is a new day, make it the day you change your life..........I did ..............Lloyd
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    Three suggestions: don't buy what you can't eat. If it's not in the house you're less likely to drive to the store to get it. Also, try to come up with some recipes that are friendly to how you need to eat but still let you get what you're craving. Finally, give yourself a break. :) Bad days happen, this is a marathon, not a sprint.
  • Pocket_Pixi
    Pocket_Pixi Posts: 1,167 Member
    Suck it up and move on?

    The only thing you can do is go forward, get rid of the crap in your house and leave it at that.
  • amysuespears
    amysuespears Posts: 127
    First of all, you're not a failure. You're human, and humans make mistakes and do impulsive things. Pick yourself back up, jump back on the wagon, and finish the ride. If you accept this hurdle for what it is (a bump in the road... NOT a failure), then it's easier to get back on track and continue. Tomorrow.... start over. Hold your head high.... don't let it beat you. Next time you get the urge to stuff your face, think to yourself "will this be worth it when I'm finished pigging out?" ask yourself " why am i doing this? am i hungry or just eating from depression or boredom?" take the time to analyze this... if you're eating out of boredom, depression, or just to satisfy cravings, STEP AWAY FROM THE FRIDGE! you should schedule your meals and pre-plan your foods so you know when you'll be eating next and what you're going to ingest. You can do it... it's hard, but you can do it!!
  • melsinct
    melsinct Posts: 3,512 Member
    We all screw up. It happens, such is life. Don't beat yourself up; feeling physically awful is punishment enough. Now log the damage you have done and pick yourself up and dust yourself off starting NOW!
  • LittlestStar
    LittlestStar Posts: 18 Member
    I do this. It happens. Don't beat yourself up for it and just move forward.

    For me, sometimes when I focus too much on what I'm NOT allowed, I start to obsess and crave it and that drives me into the kitchen for crazy food fest. Maybe that's what's going on?

    Why not promise yourself a treat or two every day, as long as you exercise, or something like that? That way, you'll have an easier time.

    Also, if you get hungry (and even before you get hungry), it helps to have a little quality snack of about 200 calories plus some water or tea to help stave off a binge.

    Good luck. I've definitely been there and I'm sure I'll be there again, but I hope some of my suggestions are helpful. Remember, it's a journey and you just have to keep on moving forward, even after setbacks.
  • kantone999
    kantone999 Posts: 174
    The best advice I have is: baby steps. Don't take an all-or-nothing approach. If we had done that when we were learning to walk, we'd all still be sitting around on our diapers. Eliminate one thing at a time. Choose the one that gives you the most grief. For me it's gluten. Week 1: Eat only whole grain wheat or choose rice/gluten free products. Week 2, try to improve last week's performance. When you go for a whole month without breaking that new habit, start another one. If you make too stringent a change, it will be very difficult to stick with it. Why make it harder than it already is? Remember, it takes 28 days to form a new habit and about 90 for it to become permanent. (Hence the period of time rehab programs utilize.)

    I've given up refined sugar and flour, alcohol, high-fat, empty carb snacks and now I'm working on sodium. It's taken about a year but hey! It works. Good luck!
  • Mindful_Trent
    Mindful_Trent Posts: 3,954 Member
    The question you should be asking yourself is "Why did I go stuff my face?" - you knew you shouldn't, but you did, so something must've triggered you. Were you tired? bored? depressed? hungry?

    Figure out what your triggers are, and plan. When you start feeling that way, have a plan of attack mapped out.

    For me, I get munchy after work but before dinner is ready, so I've started eating a serving of greek yogurt around 3:30-4pm, which takes the edge off my hunger. I also eat often due to emotional reasons, so I try to find other things to do that doesn't involve being in the kitchen and that takes my mind off food (ex. reading, crafts, working on the computer, etc.)
  • carrieregina
    carrieregina Posts: 13 Member
    Uggh. I've been there too. I had a pang of self-recognition when I read this. Gorging on food ... mindlessly eating. And one I'm particularly not proud of ... sneaking food behind my family's back. I don't know what to say except keep on going, hang on, this too shall pass.
  • annabellj
    annabellj Posts: 1,337 Member
    Three suggestions: don't buy what you can't eat. If it's not in the house you're less likely to drive to the store to get it. Also, try to come up with some recipes that are friendly to how you need to eat but still let you get what you're craving. Finally, give yourself a break. :) Bad days happen, this is a marathon, not a sprint.
    agreed, suck it to experience and move on. you can do it, just get it out of the house if it is a problem. i cant have brownies, cookies, cake,but ice cream doesnt bother me as much and i let the kids have it in the house. as long as it doesnt have choc in it or brownies, i am fine.
  • Juliebean_1027
    Juliebean_1027 Posts: 713 Member
    Don't wait for tomorrow to turn it around, start this very second. You can still get a good workout in and burn some of those calories off. Go for a walk. Do some jumping jacks. Every little bit of exercise will help. Drink plenty of water to flush some of that crap out of your body. If you were driving in the wrong direction you wouldn't wait a day to turn around, so why should eating right and exercising be any different?
  • sjtreely
    sjtreely Posts: 1,014 Member
    If hunger isn't the problem, then food isn't the answer. Figure out what the problem is. Until then you'll be yo-yoing.

    And I agree with many others ... don't bring your weakness into the house if at all possible. Although I'm still working on what my "problem(s)" are, I do know that a bag of chips doesn't stand a chance of making it more than 2 hours if I bring it into my home.
  • cheshirequeen
    cheshirequeen Posts: 1,324 Member
    dont ever call yourself a failure, ever again. start right over. not buying stuff, my weakness is peanut butter cookies, yummy, so i dont even go down the aisle they are in. you can have these things, just in small amounts. that might be the problem, you are denying yourself. i do get those cookies sometimes, but i send half over to my mom and dads. haha. i just make sure i have a plan. maybe make your things and separate them into tupperware and only eat whats in there. again, you arent a failure, as long as you learn.
  • Pat11d
    Pat11d Posts: 16 Member
    Is the diet restriction doctor prescribed or self chosen? Are they allergies or intolerances or personal choice?
    Make a list to post in plain sight in the kitchen of why you can't have those items.
    I have several intolerances and usually only slip up with the lactose and citrus ones.
    Just breath and take a look at what you are trying to eat when avoiding those items.
    Are you making dishes appealing and tasty? Or are you throwing together foods just to meet calorie and nutrient demands?
    Looking into ways of enjoying your healthier foods might make the slip ups less common.
    Slip ups happen don't beat yourself up. Instead pick yourself up and learn from what triggered the fall.
  • Dangerously15
    Dangerously15 Posts: 31
    thanks soooooo much for all the encouraging words! You have no idea how much it means to me.
  • PennyNickel14
    PennyNickel14 Posts: 749 Member
    You are NOT a FAILURE! You are a work in PROGRESS!
  • poulingail
    poulingail Posts: 110
    We can only control the temptations in front of us. If you can get rid of the things you simply die for then do so but I suspect you are eating those things for another reason. Think about it. Make the choices in the here and now that you can make. Stuffing your face is not about hunger or cravings. It goes beyond that and you need to get in touch with it, forgive yourself, love yourself more, and move on to the next hour of your day. You can do this. It has to be more important than making something feel better inside. We will be here for you either way.
    Peace and love from this old hippie.
  • Jenninedinburgh
    Jenninedinburgh Posts: 70 Member
    You have to be able to forgive yourself. These kind of days are going to happen, because you're human! We all are :) I know it is extremely difficult, but this is a process - there are going to be streaks where you're totally on target and winning, and there are going to be days when you slip. The goal is to make the winning outweigh the slips, and love yourself enough to forgive yourself when less than perfect days happen :)

    You CAN do this! :)

    Well said! :)
  • Mindful_Trent
    Mindful_Trent Posts: 3,954 Member
    You are NOT a FAILURE! You are a work in PROGRESS!

    Love this - another way to look at it, is that there is NO failure - you only fail if you give up completely. Every setback or mistake or bad decision can be used as a learning experience - and a stepping stone to get where you want to be. You just have to make the effort to analyze what happened and really learn from it.
  • Lovemydounts
    Lovemydounts Posts: 199 Member
    it happens to all of us your not alone .i been bad for 2 months and now i started back up 3 days ago ..just get back up and dust your self off thats all u can do .just dont keep being bad lol good luck .
  • Kougra
    Kougra Posts: 358 Member
    You are absolutely not a failure. You are human and we are far from perfect. You acknowledged that you binged on things that you shouldn't have, learn from it and move on. Calling yourself a failure is setting yourself up for not succeeding. It is ok to mess up. Just get back on the crazy ride and try again. Most of us didn't get it right the first time! No matter what you think of yourself, I think you are beautiful! :flowerforyou:
  • RachelRunner78
    RachelRunner78 Posts: 59 Member
    Don't wait for tomorrow to turn it around, start this very second. You can still get a good workout in and burn some of those calories off. Go for a walk. Do some jumping jacks. Every little bit of exercise will help. Drink plenty of water to flush some of that crap out of your body. If you were driving in the wrong direction you wouldn't wait a day to turn around, so why should eating right and exercising be any different?

    Great analogy...I never thought of it like that... I will remember this analogy next time I am in this position.
  • janet_pratt
    janet_pratt Posts: 747 Member
    You're only a failure if you give up. Have a healthy dinner and start again tomorrow. You can do this.
  • RachelRunner78
    RachelRunner78 Posts: 59 Member
    thanks soooooo much for all the encouraging words! You have no idea how much it means to me.

    Thank you for posting. I commend you for reaching out for help, we all feel like we have failed sometimes. :)
  • fordster99
    fordster99 Posts: 181 Member
    You should definitely follow the advice of everyone on here. I think we have all had those days. I have had several of them and still managed to lose quite a bit of weight. I don't let it stop me from my ultimate goal. If you aren't supposed to have these things then my advice would be to keep them out of the house. I would also suggest getting in a long workout today.
  • Kougra
    Kougra Posts: 358 Member
    thanks soooooo much for all the encouraging words! You have no idea how much it means to me.

    Just remember you are NOT alone. We have been there and are willing to give you a hand up! Best Wishes and Many Blessings to you.
    Namaste
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    You have to be able to forgive yourself. These kind of days are going to happen, because you're human! We all are :) I know it is extremely difficult, but this is a process - there are going to be streaks where you're totally on target and winning, and there are going to be days when you slip. The goal is to make the winning outweigh the slips, and love yourself enough to forgive yourself when less than perfect days happen :)

    You CAN do this! :)

    ^^ beautifully said! we all have off-days, just make the next day better!
  • thirdtime
    thirdtime Posts: 17
    So true!
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