LITERALLY CRAPPING MYSELF :( :(

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ashleigh2311
ashleigh2311 Posts: 105 Member
in Motivation and Support
2 meals out tomorrow. i hate hate hate eating out, it is just so stressful

It really risks bad compensation habits coming back :/

It's my flipping 21st birthday and I am more concerned with food than letting myself enjoy the celebrations with friends and family,

what is wrong with me?!!?

If i am allowed one day off in my entire year, and even life, it should be this. But im still absolutely dreading it.

I know my parents will be worried too because of my multiple eating disorders over the last 5 years, i just don't want to ruin it for me, my twin AND Them :(

Its not even a chain restaurant that i can find food on the database for.

And goodness knows what gluten-free options they will have available :/

ARGHHHHHH

just needing a bit of support from you guys to psyche me up, knock some sense into me so i don't go back to old habits, and cheer me up.
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Replies

  • Play_outside
    Play_outside Posts: 528 Member
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    I thought this was going to be a thread about eating too much fibre or something LOL

    So...why are you going out to eat for two meals if you hate eating out??????????? Makes no sense to me-if you're celebrating your birthday, why wouldn't you plan something you enjoy?

    As for gluten free options, most restaurants are very accommodating and appreciative if you call ahead and ask about gluten free options and discuss it with them. Most places now have items or can make you something.
  • darbym7
    darbym7 Posts: 61
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    just enjoy it. in your photo you look great, its your birthday. enjoy it, quit freaking out. not everyday is perfect. happy birthday!
  • Orrgarde86
    Orrgarde86 Posts: 120 Member
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    Enjoy your birthday! You deserve it!

    From the way you are talking it seems like you have enough will power for the bad habits not to come back!

    Happy birthday! x
  • SueGeer
    SueGeer Posts: 1,169 Member
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    One day is NOT going to hurt in the long run. It's your 21st......for goodness sake get out there and enjoy this one special day!!!!

    Have a fab birthday :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    Sue :smile: x
  • engineman312
    engineman312 Posts: 3,450 Member
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    the way you emphasis about needing gluten free food options makes me think you have special food needs. why don't you go to a resturant that serves dishes that you can enjoy freely? if it's yours and your twins bday, i dont see why that shouldn't be considered.
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
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    I suspected the thread was about Alli, which has a reputation for making folks crap themselves. :laugh:
    If i am allowed one day off in my entire year, and even life, it should be this. But im still absolutely dreading it.
    Who said that you only get one "day off" a year? It's okay to indulge once in a while. One day will not undo weeks, or even days, of "behaving". Personally, being able to enjoy myself and not count the cals once in a while helps me stay sane, and keep plugging along the rest of the time.

    Oh, and Happy Birthday! :drinker:
  • cphillips9
    cphillips9 Posts: 2
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    I feel the same way- on vacation and have no way to weigh myself so I am trying not to go overboard with my eating but its tough when everyone else is overeating. My advice- split meals with someone and eat low carb and enjoy a small dessert. I am doing this while on vacation and hiking a lot to counteract any extra calories. I will let you know if it worked when I get home and can weigh!!
  • ashleigh2311
    ashleigh2311 Posts: 105 Member
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    So...why are you going out to eat for two meals if you hate eating out??????????? Makes no sense to me-if you're celebrating your birthday, why wouldn't you plan something you enjoy?

    It is quite a rare occasion that we are all home together, so it is nice to do something together. Plus everyone else enjoys eating out, and it's my twin's birthday just as much as mine and she is really looking forward to it so i don't wan't to flake out and be pathetic and ruin it.

    As for my other meal out, it is a good friend that i don't see all that often and we have been agreeing to go out for lunch for a while but i keep bailing when i can't justify it. And i thought my birthday would be a good excuse and the most justifiable :/
  • goodasgoldilox165
    goodasgoldilox165 Posts: 333 Member
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    If this is going to work forever... then you need to be able to enjoy the occasional treat /day out without it being a big issue!
    Enjoy your birthday and relax. If healthy choices look good - that is great -but keep in mind that 'unhealthy' choices are only unhealthy if you eat them all the time!:drinker:
  • Agito
    Agito Posts: 45 Member
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    I know how you feel. It's hard to give yourself even one day sometimes, since ED thoughts are something that are always there, even if it's not a conscious thing.

    I remember staying at my grandmother's house for my birthday one year and telling her I didn't want a cake. Her sister decided to bake one anyway. It did not end well. Lots of crying and I was such a horrible person because I couldn't get myself to eat a piece of cake without freaking out over it.

    Best thing to do though, is to find out what you can eat and enjoy without feeling guilty over it. I usually just go for a steak and steamed vegetables, since I like it and the calories aren't very high.
  • tracymnx
    tracymnx Posts: 105
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    Its your birthday, chill out and enjoy yourself, you deserve it!

    And one day isnt going to ruin everything, it will probably help in the long run!

    Have a fab time, Happy Birthday!

    Tracy:flowerforyou:
  • MLArant
    MLArant Posts: 5
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    Most restaurants will accommodate special diets. If you let them know you have diet restrictions and what you want they will make it. If you want grilled chicken with steamed veggies they can do it for you. Don't stress over food... step back, take a deep breath and relax. You know what you should eat, just let the restaurant know and you will be fine. It's a win/win for everyone :wink:
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
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    "Literally"?
    ...I do not think it means what you think it means...
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
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    So...why are you going out to eat for two meals if you hate eating out??????????? Makes no sense to me-if you're celebrating your birthday, why wouldn't you plan something you enjoy?

    It is quite a rare occasion that we are all home together, so it is nice to do something together. Plus everyone else enjoys eating out, and it's my twin's birthday just as much as mine and she is really looking forward to it so i don't wan't to flake out and be pathetic and ruin it.

    As for my other meal out, it is a good friend that i don't see all that often and we have been agreeing to go out for lunch for a while but i keep bailing when i can't justify it. And i thought my birthday would be a good excuse and the most justifiable :/

    go out for coffee with your friend...or to a movie, or walk around the mall together...it's about the time spent together talking and catching up, not about the "lunch". Every time someone says "Wanna do something?" it tends to involve FOOD. Make it your mission to find OTHER things to do together!

    As for the dinner with your family and twin...tell the server you are gluten free, have a huge green salad, dressing on the side, no croutons or anything...find some kind of chicken dish and order it plain, no butter or sauces, ask for your veggies steamed, no butter....
    But most of all, ENJOY the time with your family!
  • Play_outside
    Play_outside Posts: 528 Member
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    Sorry I missed the first time that you're a twin. It's unfortunate that what should be a fun occasion for you is so stressful. Like I said though, try calling the restaurant(s) ahead and discuss gluten free eating-lots of places even have lists of gluten free items or have allergy menus (speaking as a celiac and an allergy person myself).

    I hope you are able to relax and enjoy yourself-and maybe for next year talk to your family about doing something else instead. A celebration that is less centred around food might be nice-Christmas lights walk in the park, mini golf, hiking, etc. Something fun that everyone enjoys that will be less stressful for you.

    Happy birthday!

    So...why are you going out to eat for two meals if you hate eating out??????????? Makes no sense to me-if you're celebrating your birthday, why wouldn't you plan something you enjoy?

    It is quite a rare occasion that we are all home together, so it is nice to do something together. Plus everyone else enjoys eating out, and it's my twin's birthday just as much as mine and she is really looking forward to it so i don't wan't to flake out and be pathetic and ruin it.

    As for my other meal out, it is a good friend that i don't see all that often and we have been agreeing to go out for lunch for a while but i keep bailing when i can't justify it. And i thought my birthday would be a good excuse and the most justifiable :/
  • joanneeee
    joanneeee Posts: 311 Member
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    omg i can't stop laughing at this topic title
    LITERALLY CRAPPED YOURSELF?
  • marie111
    marie111 Posts: 91 Member
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    ashleigh you have done so well with your eating disorders and you are obviously made of great strength and determination you are an inspiration to all those other people who are struggling with the same problem so from what you have said in your write up i feel that you dont need to worry about a thing because all the hard work has been done and you have acheived so much so try and enjoy your 21st because you do deserve it have a great family meal and think where you were and what you have acheived (ENJOY) Happy Birthday. marie
  • chrissi_k
    chrissi_k Posts: 175 Member
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    I can understand that it will be hard - I have to go out for lunch on Nov. 30th and already wrote the restaurant asking them how much calories their food has, it is Vapiano and I know that their past and pizzas don't have as much calories as most do, but still - but like others said, enjoy eating out with your family. You don't have to go overboard. Just oder something you maybe haven't eaten in a while and enjoy it.

    We can eat all we want, just in moderation. And you look fabulous (from your picture) and this day won't ruin anything.
    you deserver to be happy and to enjoy your and your twins big day. Don't let food and eating out ruin your big day!

    So far you must have done great with your eating disorders and you face the problems laying ahead of you. Now focus on not letting the fear get you down. You are strong and you can do it!!! Believe in yourself.
  • ninkdole
    ninkdole Posts: 243 Member
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    Am I the only one that thought this was going to be an Alli post?

    Enjoy your time with your friends and family, one day isn't going to undo everything you've achieved. Have a happy birthday.
  • Play_outside
    Play_outside Posts: 528 Member
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    As for the dinner with your family and twin...tell the server you are gluten free, have a huge green salad, dressing on the side, no croutons or anything...find some kind of chicken dish and order it plain, no butter or sauces, ask for your veggies steamed, no butter....
    But most of all, ENJOY the time with your family!

    Actually, often chicken breasts and other meats are marinated in things, so calling ahead or at least having a serious discussion with the server is really REALLY important. Not sure if the OP has been diagnosed for long, and not sure if you are GF either, but the lists of gluten containing foods in many restaurants can be really depressing. It is also really depressing to go out for dinner with a bunch of people and only be able to eat a green salad with a boring dressing. If you plan ahead and talk to them usually they will accommodate and make something appealing that is WORTH going out to eat and paying for. :)

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