Yours? Or Mine? What's the proper *etiquette*?

Jill_newimprovedversion
Jill_newimprovedversion Posts: 988 Member
edited October 2024 in Chit-Chat
OK- I seriously want some feedback. Here's the scenario:
We go out to dinner and you're paying- your treat, you say.
I order an entree, and right at the beginning- when they deliver the meal- I ask for a take home box- and put 1/2 of it in the box.
Are you perplexed? Do I *appear* rude?

I mention this because this is what I generally now do- if it's more than I feel I want to eat right then- but I do it @ the start so I don't OVEReat.
I'm just wondering if the scenario changed because I didn't *pay* for the meal, it was someone else's treat- so, technically it wasn't "my" food to take home?
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Replies

  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    In my opinion, it would only be rude if you ordered extra to take home. But you order a regular entree, I mean what else are your options? You can't order half an entree. And you don't want to waste the food.
  • hewhoiscd
    hewhoiscd Posts: 1,029 Member
    Personally, if you told me up front what you were doing and why, I'd be fine with it. Heck, I'd be fine with it even if you didn't tell me...but I would sure be curious :D

    I mean, what am I going to do, take it home myself? lol
  • Jill_newimprovedversion
    Jill_newimprovedversion Posts: 988 Member
    the other option would have been to have offered it to the person who paid for it. If I didn't offer, I suppose I could have come across rude.
  • acasey0123
    acasey0123 Posts: 640 Member
    if you had ate the entire meal in one sitting or asked for a take out box after wouldnt both of them be the same as asking for a take out box in the beginning???
  • engineman312
    engineman312 Posts: 3,450 Member
    In my opinion, it would only be rude if you ordered extra to take home. But you order a regular entree, I mean what else are your options? You can't order half an entree. And you don't want to waste the food.

    this. but i'd wait until the end to pack it up. it kinda seems that you're already preparing for the end of the date. can't you mentally just split it on the plate?
  • Puddykat1026
    Puddykat1026 Posts: 164 Member
    I do not believe it is rude. What would they do, take your leftovers home??? Would you expect to take home someone else's leftovers home?? Now, if you order another dish to take home, then you should pay for it, but definitely not for something off your own plate.
  • hazelnut861
    hazelnut861 Posts: 390 Member
    I do the same thing. I don't think it's rude but I guess if it's perceived as rude you could mentally divide up your plate before you start eating then ask for the box. Portions at restaurants are huge these days.
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    First if you were with me, I would have a box right next to yours so there would be no issue.:wink:

    Second, if you ate 1/2 your meal THEN asked for a to go box, would this person want your leftovers?:huh:

    If it was a business dinner, I would not ask for a box at the beginning of the meal. If you are out with a friend, they should understand already where you are at. :flowerforyou:

    If it is a first date, they BETTER be from MFP!!:laugh:
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
    Wait until the end. Then, I would assume that you were full, and wanted to take the leftovers home. No need to explain why you're doing it.

    Offering half of the leftovers to the other person, though, would be weird to me -- and unhygienic.
  • Galletakek
    Galletakek Posts: 285
    I would give you this face ----> -.-.... and then give you this face =.-..... and as you put the food in the homebox this face >.>............. bahahah then I would tell the waiter to take my food back and would take the home box and eat that half.. :D that's only cause I try to save money.... and im cheap : /... hard times lol :D ..

    In all srs tho.. I said I would pay soooo that's what im going to do.. what you do with the food, is up to you....
  • EricNCSU
    EricNCSU Posts: 699 Member
    I agree with above... if you are being treated, and only ordered an entree (and not go over board with appetizer AND entree AND dessert that you can't all eat) and you let them know "Hey, I can't eat all this so I'm gonna pack some of it up to take home" then I don't see how that is rude. It's no different than they buy you a dinner and "OOoooo I'm stuffed, I'll have to take the rest of this home"...
  • mikethom
    mikethom Posts: 183 Member
    I know lots of people who do this; it wouldn't bother me. But, I would would be put out if you ordered a bunch of extra food; say ordered two apps and and entree and then packed up most or all of the entree; I'd feel a bit taken advantage of :smile:
  • daveytrouble
    daveytrouble Posts: 24
    i think it would be pretty strange if you offered me the other half.

    i suppose there are people who would see themselves being taken advantage of in this situation. but in my opinion those people are probably morons.

    since this person would be buying me lunch i'm assuming we're friends. and i try not to keep company with morons (unless they're buying me lunch...) so i would like to think this wouldn't be a problem.
  • kcb315
    kcb315 Posts: 160 Member
    If it is a first date, they BETTER be from MFP!!:laugh:

    haha love this
  • Just_Bethy
    Just_Bethy Posts: 272
    I would explain before I even ordered...regardless of whether I was paying or someone else was...A simple.."Hey don't think me weird but I have to pack half my food up before I go over board as I am seriously trying to lose weight" would save any confusion ...You could always order from the appetizer menu instead of the entree menu to save this from happening too...
  • allie864
    allie864 Posts: 298
    Ok, first off, I didn't think this thread was going to be about splitting up a dinner :tongue:
    but i'd wait until the end to pack it up. it kinda seems that you're already preparing for the end of the date.

    Secondly, I don't think it's rude to take half home or anything (it's one entree, it's yours how & when you want to eat it) BUT I also agree with what's above ^
  • capriciousmoon
    capriciousmoon Posts: 1,263 Member
    It's a lot less rude than people that destroy half their food so they won't eat it. There are people that will actually eat half and then pour candle wax or whatever is available on the other half so they don't eat it. -_-

    If they bought it for you it is your food. Boxing up half is pretty normal when you're dieting or if you have a small appetite.
  • Saffyra
    Saffyra Posts: 607 Member
    I would never expect to take home your extra half of food.

    However, unless you were my good friend and I knew you were working on losing weight, I might look at you a little askance as you asked for the box BEFORE you started eating.

    If it was a date or a business lunch/dinner, I would wait until the end to ask for a box. Unless you really feel you couldn't control yourself and don't care what the person you are with thinks.

    But never would I expect to take home the leftovers from someone elses dinner that I bought them.
  • NoAdditives
    NoAdditives Posts: 4,251 Member
    In my opinion, it would only be rude if you ordered extra to take home. But you order a regular entree, I mean what else are your options? You can't order half an entree. And you don't want to waste the food.

    this. but i'd wait until the end to pack it up. it kinda seems that you're already preparing for the end of the date. can't you mentally just split it on the plate?

    Yeah, this is what I do, mainly because it's never physically possible for me to eat more than half.
  • engineman312
    engineman312 Posts: 3,450 Member
    It's a lot less rude than people that destroy half their food so they won't eat it. There are people that will actually eat half and then pour candle wax or whatever is available on the other half so they don't eat it. -_-

    if i was on a date and the person did that, i would seriously get up, settle the bill up front, and walk the FUDGE OUT!!
  • RBXChas
    RBXChas Posts: 2,708 Member
    I think this is akin to someone's treating you to a meal, then you pack up (and take home) the leftovers at the end of the meal, except that you are doing it at the beginning. Just to avoid awkwardness or the appearance of being rude, I would hold off on boxing it up and just eat half of what's on your plate, then pack up what you didn't eat at the end.

    I am also a little overly sensitive to others' feelings, in that I wouldn't want them to feel like a huge pig because I packed up half of my food at the beginning and they didn't, so I would wait until the end to box up half my meal regardless. Plus then you don't have that take-out box sitting on your table, taking up space! Additionally, if you end up eating less than half, you don't have to go through the whole boxing-up process again :)

    But no, I don't think it was rude at all, not even close. I'm guessing you're not rude in general if you are worried about this, which is a small thing in the grand scheme. I wouldn't bat an eyelash if someone did this when I was treating them to a meal, especially since I have seen some pretty boorish behavior in restaurants.
  • RBXChas
    RBXChas Posts: 2,708 Member
    It's a lot less rude than people that destroy half their food so they won't eat it. There are people that will actually eat half and then pour candle wax or whatever is available on the other half so they don't eat it. -_-

    if i was on a date and the person did that, i would seriously get up, settle the bill up front, and walk the FUDGE OUT!!

    I wouldn't go as far as to walk out, but I'd be a little put off. I've heard of people dumping their drink (or water) on their plate. Way to make a mess for the staff!!!
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
    Avoid the drama, and box it up when you're done.
  • janet_pratt
    janet_pratt Posts: 747 Member
    I think if you tell them up front that you are watching your calorie intake and that you don't want to waste half, they would be fine with it. But if it were me, I wouldn't think it was strange or have a problem with it even if you didn't tell me.
  • karenjoy
    karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
    I would be mortified, but I am English and have NEVER eaten in a restaurant that offers you a 'box' to take food home in...other than pizza hut....so this is way out of my experience and so take no notice of me......
  • Maryfullofgrace
    Maryfullofgrace Posts: 342 Member
    I am not sure what is proper etiquette, per se. Maybe think about it this way. Put yourself in the other persons shoes, which is what I think you are doing and you are seeing it might come across to them as rude. Next time maybe ask your friend, date, whoever is paying if they want to split an entree. If the answer is "no" then practice your acting... when they bring the food be prepared with a convincing face---

    You: Oh my!!! (lift up the plate, feel how heavy it is...)
    You: "Oh... gosh this is A LOT of food... Look, this could feed a family of 4! I KNOW i am not going to be able to eat all of this... oh gosh... do you want some of this?"

    your friend: "naw, I'm good here..." (Is probably what they are going to say) or they might say "Heck yeah bring it on!" or they might say "You don't have to eat it all...."
    You: to the waiter, "would you mind bringing me a box?"
    Box arrives...
    You: "You want me to get another box and you can have some too to take home?"
    them: "nah, go ahead..."
  • Jill_newimprovedversion
    Jill_newimprovedversion Posts: 988 Member
    I am not sure what is proper etiquette, per se. Maybe think about it this way. Put yourself in the other persons shoes, which is what I think you are doing and you are seeing it might come across to them as rude. Next time maybe ask your friend, date, whoever is paying if they want to split an entree. If the answer is "no" then practice your acting... when they bring the food be prepared with a convincing face---

    You: Oh my!!! (lift up the plate, feel how heavy it is...)
    You: "Oh... gosh this is A LOT of food... Look, this could feed a family of 4! I KNOW i am not going to be able to eat all of this... oh gosh... do you want some of this?"

    your friend: "naw, I'm good here..." (Is probably what they are going to say) or they might say "Heck yeah bring it on!" or they might say "You don't have to eat it all...."
    You: to the waiter, "would you mind bringing me a box?"
    Box arrives...
    You: "You want me to get another box and you can have some too to take home?"
    them: "nah, go ahead..."

    OK! This^^^^ definitely qualifies as the "drama" referred to earlier. This is how I may handle it NEXT time though, should I go again with the same person. Sarcasm to the MAX.
  • Maryfullofgrace
    Maryfullofgrace Posts: 342 Member
    Of course then be gracious for the dinner, send a little "thank you note" to them the following day telling them the conviviality of the evening was enjoyed again savoring the memories with my leftovers. Then close with a return invitation to your home for a lunch or coffee.

    Boom, etiquette... the lost art of the "thank you note". Makes everything better when you show appreciation.
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
    Of course then be gracious for the dinner, send a little "thank you note" to them the following day telling them the conviviality of the evening was enjoyed again savoring the memories with my leftovers. Then close with a return invitation to your home for a lunch or coffee.

    Boom, etiquette... the lost art of the "thank you note". Makes everything better when you show appreciation.
    What is this "thank you note" you speak of? :wink:
  • Maryfullofgrace
    Maryfullofgrace Posts: 342 Member
    It's this short little note that you get delivered by post, and for some crazy reason, it always makes the receiver extremely happy!?! :wink:
This discussion has been closed.

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