Desperately wanting kids

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  • LolasEpicJourney
    LolasEpicJourney Posts: 1,010 Member
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    Thanks for your words everyone.
    I have been charting things for a while now.
    I made a doctors appointment for next month also.
    the very idea that I could have REAL infertility issues scares me so bad.
    I am all for adoption which is why I want to know if I can or can't have my own children.
    My parents had issues having children. They adopted my sister and 4 years later were finally able to have one of their own. My mother's issues were flukey and not genetic though so it doesn't really help my situation.
  • Pangui
    Pangui Posts: 373 Member
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    While I can appreciate your grief, I cannot share it. I have never wanted to bring another child into this over crowded and over-populated world. Maybe I am just a pessimist. I don't place much value in genetics. That's why, when my husband mentioned that he would like to be a father after 20 years together, we adopted. I don't even have any idea if I could have had children or not. For us, adoption was our First Choice.

    Now I can really appreciate what I would have been missing out on. Being a parent is definitely the most rewarding and difficult choice I have ever made. I am so glad we adopted, especially when there are so many wonderful and needy children in the world.

    Even if you do go on and have success bringing another life into this world, please consider adoption.
  • IvoryParchment
    IvoryParchment Posts: 651 Member
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    It's not that easy to adopt -- it's very expensive, and someone can be excluded for health reasons, including being overweight. Many countries are cutting down on foreign adoptions due to abuse (children kidnapped and sold) or because it looks bad that they can't care for their own orphans. You see kids suffering in other parts of the world and just want to go take one in your arms and love it, but not everyone is Madonna and able to cut through all the constantly changing red tape in countries that run on bribery.
  • aroller1
    aroller1 Posts: 4 Member
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    I understand what your going through. Me and my husband have been trying for 2 years come April. It sucks because I know its me. I adopted his children after we got married. They were 5months and 3 years when we got together and now they are 6 and 9. So they are my babies but I missed the whole pregnancy experience as well as having to get to hold a newborn. I'm still trying and haven't given up. In fact have been seeing a wonderful doctor through this. Just gotta trim off the extra weight and save $. Infertility stuff is super high. If you ever need to talk just send me a message.
  • moyafigura
    moyafigura Posts: 140 Member
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    Its so sad to know of people who would love to have a baby, and its not happening, and others who have them and throw them out.

    And that's exactly why adoption is such a beautiful thing. Everyone gets what they want. Parents get a child, a child gets a family, everyone is happy.

    I am very supportive of adoption. Just wanted to clarify "throw them out" meant babies found in the trash, that comment was actually made around the time i saw a story on tv about that. Breaks my heart. If only those kind of people would realize that they would be better of giving the baby to someone.
  • melaniejames
    melaniejames Posts: 11 Member
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    I tried for 5 years with my first husband and never even got pregnant. I've been with my current hubby for a year and with the help of meds got pregnant twice. Despite the pregnancies not holding and all the emotions that come with the hope and then the failure at least now I know I can get pregnant. It gives me hope that maybe with weight loss, meds, and exercise that maybe I will get pregnant and stay pregnant. If not it will be a whole lot of saving money to afford infertility treatments and/or adoption.
  • coloradocuppiecake
    coloradocuppiecake Posts: 129
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    Im sorry that you are going through this. It's painful when you want children so badly. 2Yrs ago I got pregnant and at the 12th week I found out that it was ectopic. I was rushed into surgery where they removed my right tube. Somehow during the surgery they damaged the nerve to my left leg and left that side paralyzed. After 2 yrs of being in pain everyday and depression, I am finally able
    to walk without a cane. Im scared to death to try again. Im 43 and I honestly couldnt go through that pain again. So, we are trying to
    establish a somewhat normal life again. I need to get back to work (fyi- I tried to sue the dr but no lawyer would touch the case)
    My boyfriend is the only one who works. Life is tough but 2 yrs ago it was a nightmare. Anyway, I wish you luck and some day there
    will be a baby for us. Maybe not one I had myself, but one to love as our own.

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