33-F Long Intro Post !!

Hello everyone! I am a yo yo dieter who never gets down to where she wants to be!! I am 33 years old. I am a mother of two girls (6 and 8), happily married, and is employed as a teacher for prek. I always fluctuate from a size 12 to a 16. I am tall, so I look good, but not happy with my weight. I want to be a size 10. I went to a barriatrics doctor several weeks ago. I have lost 14 pounds as of today. I was up to 201.4 two and a half weeks back. Now I am at 187.4. I am hovering at 187 for since Monday. Today is Thursday. My goal last Monday was to weigh 185 by this Sunday (Mothers Day). Something spectacular must happen to reach that I think. I have been dead on with my diet for two weeks now. I am suffering tremendously. I have not cheated. I have come to the conclusion that I have to either say yes to delicious food or yes to a thin body. I cant say yes to both. I live with constant food dissapointment and it sucks. Everyday for lunch, I am having a salad which is pretty much just lettuce and carrots and broccoli and cauliflower. Today I cut up a little tomato and put in a few walnuts. I am using a Salad spritzer for the dressing, which is a touch of nothing really when you compare it to the full fat ranch I like to pour on my salad. Then I will have a yogurt or an applesauce or a piece of fruit. I try to put some protien in there but it varies. Cut up chicken breast or a can of tuna or a few slices of pepporoni. When I running late and cant find protien, Ill eat a quarter of a protien bar. Nothing good with that lunch, while everyone around me is eating broccoli cheese casserole or mashed potatos and fried chicken and chocolate cake.

For breakfast I stick with a protein shake (6 oz of light soy milk, choc. protien powder, and some type of fruit which can be rasberries, strawberries, banana or a combo of those.) Then a sprinkle in just a little pysilla husk. Thats like a ground fiber. Blend that up with some ice and you have one yuckfest. Its tolerable, but is is no bowl of captain crunch or mcdonalds biscuit. And finally, I cut the diet coke out. I only drink diet coke when I am forced to. It limits it to about one diet coke a week or less. Also no coffee or any beverage with asparteme. Water, at LEAST 64 oz a day. I cut out bread to only when necessary, about once a week or less. Dinner has been hard and it varies, but Ive gotten used to hungry. I have once again started my food diary today just so I can balance myself. I am currently taking a appetite suppressant and that helps all day until about evening.

I am in a weight loss contest at school. The prize is $140. Weigh in is May 27. I am going to the beach on May 28, so I have some good incentives. I have noticed my clothes fit much, much better. I am very excited about losing 7 more pounds. My overall goal is to get down to 180 before I go to the beach. Then, the thing is, I cant just let it all go and hog out at the beach. Oh no. I am going to have to stay on my diet and eat moderately. Watch everyone else drink the margiritas and pack the chips in their gullet. Ill have to eat like I am eating right now, because there is no way in hell that I am going to come back from the beach 7 pounds heavier after I have KILLED myself trying to lose it. That will be tough. Anyway, thats where I am.

If anyone has actually read all of this. I want to start a new group for people with my same struggles. I dont know much about how to do it, because I am new to this site. Let me know if your interested. :flowerforyou: