I lost a lot of motivation and confidence..

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Pengygirl24
Pengygirl24 Posts: 34
in Motivation and Support
So, I thought I looked good, so I wore a skirt I haven't been able to wear for years, and a really cute top (a little low cut) but I thought it looked cute. So, I took a picture and put it on FB.. and one of the people I thought was a friend said (and I quote) "I hate to say it sweety, but you are too fat to be wearing things like that. It just makes you look like a fat *kitten* that wants to be a stripper." What am I supposed to say to that?
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Replies

  • rockerbabyy
    rockerbabyy Posts: 2,258 Member
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    wow...
    i would say something about how hard youve worked to improve your health and lose weight...explain how you havent been able to wear the skirt for years etc. and how hurt you are at their reaction. and tell them if thats the most support they can give you, maybe you shouldnt be friends any more.

    even if she (he?) doesnt think it looks good, they could have said it a whole lot nicer and in a more supportive way
  • Labcoathipster
    Labcoathipster Posts: 171
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    Unfriend.
  • jofromnz
    jofromnz Posts: 82 Member
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    Reminds me of an old saying: 'With friends like that, who needs enemies!' This person is not a friend - I say delete the comment and un-friend - that comment is pure nasty!!
  • SmujnZ
    SmujnZ Posts: 47 Member
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    wow honesty is one thing, but there are ways and means of being tactful CRIKEY. Totally uncalled for - if its someone you want to keep as a friend you need to confront them though and say how it hurt you.
  • ElementalEscapee
    ElementalEscapee Posts: 552 Member
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    Woooow what a *****. Well, personally I would say something along the lines of how I may be fat, but you're ugly, and I can diet, orrr look who's talking, orrrr I hate to say it sweety, but you are too nice to be saying things like that. It just makes you sound like a total ***** *kitten* **** that wants to be the star on Jersey Shore (lmao I don't even watch that show, but I heard the cast consists of *kitten*)." But then again I can be rude and immature when people are rude and immature to me haha so you probably shouldn't use any of those XD

    Unfriending her would be the simplest solution I suppose.
  • Blessedmommy_2x
    Blessedmommy_2x Posts: 419 Member
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    That is NOT a friend. If she was concerned about your weight she could've mentioned it privately. But a statement like that is not only the opposite of what a friend would say but totally uncalled for and disrespectful! You are are beautiful at any weight, if she didn't like the picture she didn't have to look at it. Keep your head up and don't let anyone steal your joy!

    I say, unfriend, and delete her comment.

    * I would consider myself a VERY honest straight forward person... but I am also a Christian. And I would never in a million years put something so hateful/heartless on a "friends" picture. Its not her place to say something like that... how is that even helpful? I've heard of constructive criticism but that was NOT it! That was embarrassing and slandering a friend in public! So Sorry!
  • JaneDoughSanAntonio
    JaneDoughSanAntonio Posts: 65 Member
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    Unfriend.

    This.
  • megscole64
    megscole64 Posts: 4
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    Friend? Really? Ouch. I consider myself a pretty blunt and sometimes less than sensitive person...but I'd NEVER say that to a friend. Or anything even close to that. Not cool.
  • PennyNickel14
    PennyNickel14 Posts: 749 Member
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    Unfriend and who would say something like that. I mean Really?!?!?

    When someone makes a mean comment 90% of the time it is about them and not about you. Pity the girl who feels the need to say stuff like that.
  • changinmyways72
    changinmyways72 Posts: 73
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    Before you unfriend her, I would make a comment back about your hard work and how far you've come. I'd also make a comment about being tactful instead of downright insulting, make her feel stupid for being really rude. Then unfriend her!

    I think you look great!
  • Hikaru37
    Hikaru37 Posts: 177 Member
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    Tell her to f.u.c.k off the nasty cow, block and delete her a.s.s and please don't dwell on her words D:

    You've done really well and if you let a jealous toad like her affect you, she'll have won!
    Keep being determined and from what I can see off your DP you're not even fat!! You have a gorgeous figure!!


    Ohmagawwwwwwd I'm so angry for you right now, I want to batter her
  • gabadabadoo
    gabadabadoo Posts: 49
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    Unfriend.

    Agree strenuously. Don't bother to reply - they're not worth it.
  • MaximalLife
    MaximalLife Posts: 2,447 Member
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    So, I thought I looked good, so I wore a skirt I haven't been able to wear for years, and a really cute top (a little low cut) but I thought it looked cute. So, I took a picture and put it on FB.. and one of the people I thought was a friend said (and I quote) "I hate to say it sweety, but you are too fat to be wearing things like that. It just makes you look like a fat *kitten* that wants to be a stripper." What am I supposed to say to that?
    You thank them for being honest.
    Too often we delude ourselves, so you are NOT alone. It about perspective.
    When I lost 40lbs from 262 down to 220, I went from a 46 inch pants size down to size 40. I thought I looked GREAT!

    On our vacation, I was at a beach in swimsuit, and pictures were taken.
    Pictures don't lie, and although improved, I still was fat and hanging out - looked like a walrus.

    Now, I am down an additional 30 lbs or so, and things are really looking good, but we are not there yet.
    Just keep it real, be glad for your progress and keep punching ahead.

    You are doing great.
  • MaximalLife
    MaximalLife Posts: 2,447 Member
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    wow...
    i would say something about how hard youve worked to improve your health and lose weight...explain how you havent been able to wear the skirt for years etc. and how hurt you are at their reaction. and tell them if thats the most support they can give you, maybe you shouldnt be friends any more.

    even if she (he?) doesnt think it looks good, they could have said it a whole lot nicer and in a more supportive way
    NO!
    Not THIS ^^^^^^

    The last thing you want to do is to start sniveling and crying as you explain it all to those who just don't want to hear it.
    They don't care.

    Delete the comment, unfriend that person and move on.
    Also, remove the pic; that person was probably saying what most were thinking.
  • Galletakek
    Galletakek Posts: 285
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    rofl.. wow someones friend sounds a lil jelly! don't delete her or be mean.. kill her with kindness blow her a kiss :D and keep posting all the cute pics you want hun! you look amazing .!
  • ljb82
    ljb82 Posts: 72 Member
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    Unfriend.

    Ditto!
  • Bevbu
    Bevbu Posts: 4 Member
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    Nasty nasty nasty !!!!!
  • Aereon
    Aereon Posts: 27 Member
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    You look fine and should wear whatever you want. Someone like that is just trying to make them self feel better by bringing you down.
  • threecolouredy
    threecolouredy Posts: 10
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    Delete them as friends! They are no use to you when you most need encouragement
  • Jessie544
    Jessie544 Posts: 127 Member
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    As with the previous replies, UNFRIEND! Just from that comment shows enough of her true self to show there's no reason to be friends with someone that poisonous.

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