Riddle me this......

Troll
Troll Posts: 922 Member
edited October 7 in Chit-Chat
okay, my fiance and i have been together for 6 years, engaged for one. Why is it, every time someone finds out about the pending wedding, they ask when we're having kids.....BUT THEN get PERSONALLY offended when i say i dont want kids. It's like i said,"i hate all children because of your demon spawn." instead of,"right now we just arent prepared for kids, and with our career plans i just dont see us having any." it's laughable, but confuses the boogers out of me! Also, when i say my colors are black and red, and its a fall wedding....why do people start offering to buy spiderwebs? Black and red in december is elegant, but in october its a costume party? Lmao!
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Replies

  • _binary_jester_
    _binary_jester_ Posts: 2,132 Member
    okay, my fiance and i have been together for 6 years, engaged for one. Why is it, every time someone finds out about the pending wedding, they ask when we're having kids.....BUT THEN get PERSONALLY offended when i say i dont want kids. It's like i said,"i hate all children because of your demon spawn." instead of,"right now we just arent prepared for kids, and with our career plans i just dont see us having any." it's laughable, but confuses the boogers out of me! Also, when i say my colors are black and red, and its a fall wedding....why do people start offering to buy spiderwebs? Black and red in december is elegant, but in october its a costume party? Lmao!
    BECAUSE ALL MARRIED PEOPLE WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE WE HAVE!!!!!

    (yes i was yelling. I am not bitter at all)
  • Krizzle4Rizzle
    Krizzle4Rizzle Posts: 2,704 Member
    I'm not sure. This confuses me as well. I have been told I have a selfish lifestyle because I don't have kids. I even want them someday, but people get offended by the fact I don't have any. I think it has more to do with their issues than your choices. In all reality, it really isn't any of their damn concern.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,716 Member
    BECAUSE ALL MARRIED PEOPLE WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE WE HAVE!!!!!

    (yes i was yelling. I am not bitter at all)

    Bingo.

    "But..what do you mean? I have kids. They're the joy of my life. You have to have kids. You can't just do what you want forever. Spending your money and time on yourself. I didn't think that was an option..."

    Ignore them. You do what's right for your life.


    And use birth control or your little plan may not work out so well...
  • okay, my fiance and i have been together for 6 years, engaged for one. Why is it, every time someone finds out about the pending wedding, they ask when we're having kids.....BUT THEN get PERSONALLY offended when i say i dont want kids. It's like i said,"i hate all children because of your demon spawn." instead of,"right now we just arent prepared for kids, and with our career plans i just dont see us having any." it's laughable, but confuses the boogers out of me! Also, when i say my colors are black and red, and its a fall wedding....why do people start offering to buy spiderwebs? Black and red in december is elegant, but in october its a costume party? Lmao!
    BECAUSE ALL MARRIED PEOPLE WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE WE HAVE!!!!!

    (yes i was yelling. I am not bitter at all)

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! isn't that the truth!! Or better yet, why not have 7 and then find out your hubby no longer wants a family....and you have 7 kids!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH! If you're not ready don't have them, if you're never ready that's ok too!
  • jennajava
    jennajava Posts: 2,176 Member
    People are stupid.
  • _binary_jester_
    _binary_jester_ Posts: 2,132 Member
    People are stupid.
    The use of people would in your statement would include you also.
  • beerbomber
    beerbomber Posts: 184 Member
    damn....I was so hoping for

    "riddle me this, riddle me that, who is afraid of the big black bat"
  • chicky89
    chicky89 Posts: 260 Member
    People look at me the same way!!!! "you are young... once you are around kids, you will want some of your own and change your mind" Keep in mind, I worked in a day care for 3 years... but yes, once Im around them I will want them!!! Gah!!!!!!

    Only way I would ever have kids, is if I end up with someone who REALLY wants kids, Id be all for it. I wouldnt want to take that away from them. But if Im with someone who doesnt want kids, were not having kids!!
  • meltygarden
    meltygarden Posts: 111 Member
    There are lots of reasons why people react that way, but you know what? Every single one of those reasons is their problem, and their baggage, not yours. ;)

    (proud mom of two kids here, best thing I ever did....but my daughter's uteruses, and what they do with them, is not my business. there are a million ways to live a life, and parenting is just one of many, MANY options.)
  • jennajava
    jennajava Posts: 2,176 Member
    People are stupid.
    The use of people would in your statement would include you also.

    Thank you, Captain Obvious. :flowerforyou:
  • TMLPatrick
    TMLPatrick Posts: 558 Member
    Ignore... double posted
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
    I've chosen to be content with my five wonderful stepchildren, and my mother acts as though I'm sinning against nature, her and myself if I choose not to utilize my uterus.


    Your life, your decision, disregard those who would judge. :flowerforyou:
  • TMLPatrick
    TMLPatrick Posts: 558 Member
    I'm right there with you.... not interested in marriage, not interested in kids.... As for the kids thing.... I'm just too selfish and already don't have enough time as is, much less having to dedicate all my time to a child. It would really be best for both me and my hypothetical "child" if they just didn't exist, so really its for their own good.
  • Troll
    Troll Posts: 922 Member
    BECAUSE ALL MARRIED PEOPLE WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE WE HAVE!!!!! (yes i was yelling. I am not bitter at all)
    Bingo.
    "But..what do you mean? I have kids. They're the joy of my life. You have to have kids. You can't just do what you want forever. Spending your money and time on yourself. I didn't think that was an option..."
    Ignore them. You do what's right for your life. And use birth control or your little plan may not work out so well...
    LMAO! Ive had people say they would hide my BC. I told them good luck, but the nurse that injects it might get mad. and you're right, most of the people pushing have 3 or more and are NEVER happy. i told one woman,"i have dreams to travel and run a business WITHOUT carseats and a diaper bag. Sorry you didnt"
  • flimflamfloz
    flimflamfloz Posts: 1,980 Member
    People are stupid.
    The use of people would in your statement would include you also.
    Which means we can't trust her statement... But wait then she isn't stupid... But wait then... Ooooh... :explode:
  • It never fails to amaze me how people feel it is perfectly OK to comment on such things as YOUR FAMILY PLANNING. FWIW, I get ish because I have one kid and plan no more. I had a fall wedding and black white and red were my colors and we got lots of compliments!!! Spider webs never crossed my mind! LOL
  • AwesomelyAmber
    AwesomelyAmber Posts: 1,617 Member
    Date, Engage, Marry, Kids... that's just the way people think. I would much rather someone who doesn't think they want children DON'T have them. There are far too many out there that don't want the ones they have and that is sad. I love my sons more than life... but I will also love when I have MY time back and they can do their own things without constant supervision. One is 18 and one is 8, I'm getting closer to that moment every day:bigsmile: . Don't get me wrong, I don't want to rush the little one's childhood, I'm just saying that I would never wish to start again! :laugh:
  • jenhenning219
    jenhenning219 Posts: 385 Member
    people are always going to be negative no matter what, just let it roll off your back like a duck, my wedding colors were black red and white and i had it in feb. it is you decision if people dont like it then that is their problem, i believe those colors are elegant at a wedding because everything goes, and black and red are not halloween colors thats black and orange
  • FUNinTHEsun
    FUNinTHEsun Posts: 284 Member
    I am in a very similar position!! My fiance and I have been together almost 8 years, engaged for a little over 1 year and we are getting married this September. EVERYONE asks me when we are having kids...my mom, his parents, my co-workers, friends. Why does everyone assume that we want to have kids? I have only been honest with a couple of people and told them that I don't really want to have kids...those people acted like I had just told them the most offensive thing they had ever heard. Now I just keep my mouth shut. It's none of their business anyway!
  • jaxdiablo
    jaxdiablo Posts: 580
    Because dogs can't pick out a good retirement home? God said so? Uhm, you look like you've them there birthin hips? (so kidding, please don't bite my ankle).... I'm at a loss...
  • BECAUSE ALL MARRIED PEOPLE WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE WE HAVE!!!!!

    (yes i was yelling. I am not bitter at all)

    Bingo.

    "But..what do you mean? I have kids. They're the joy of my life. You have to have kids. You can't just do what you want forever. Spending your money and time on yourself. I didn't think that was an option..."

    Ignore them. You do what's right for your life.


    And use birth control or your little plan may not work out so well...



    And they always say this as their 3 kids are running around, screaming and breaking *kitten*. They put the deaf ear on and pretend it's all candy and roses. Every once in a while they'll scream so loud the neighbor 5 houses down sh*ts his pants, wondering if Bin Laden was spotted, just b/c one kid punched the other.
  • Sh1tsRainbows
    Sh1tsRainbows Posts: 1,227 Member
    People are stupid.
    The use of people would in your statement would include you also.

    AH SNAP :drinker:
  • teagin2002
    teagin2002 Posts: 1,900 Member
    :flowerforyou:
  • BECAUSE ALL MARRIED PEOPLE WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE WE HAVE!!!!!

    (yes i was yelling. I am not bitter at all)

    Bingo.

    "But..what do you mean? I have kids. They're the joy of my life. You have to have kids. You can't just do what you want forever. Spending your money and time on yourself. I didn't think that was an option..."

    Ignore them. You do what's right for your life.


    And use birth control or your little plan may not work out so well...

    Just an FYI on the birth control... my husband and I have switched three times now because the first one failed, resulting in our third child born in 06. The second one failed, resulting in the birth of our fourth child born in 07 (Mirena-I hate you for making me one of your freaking .01%), and the third one failed resulting in the birth of our fifth child, born in 10. So yeah...I told my husband he had to get a vasectomy. I'm scared to death about that even--considering I was born after my mother had a freaking tubal ligation!!! :o

    sometimes nature has it's own plan that outweighs all of our best laid plans... :)
  • BECAUSE ALL MARRIED PEOPLE WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE WE HAVE!!!!!

    (yes i was yelling. I am not bitter at all)

    Bingo.

    "But..what do you mean? I have kids. They're the joy of my life. You have to have kids. You can't just do what you want forever. Spending your money and time on yourself. I didn't think that was an option..."

    Ignore them. You do what's right for your life.

    OMG! on that note...my BF is pregnant with triplets! and she had a tubal done...has 2 children right now and didn't want anymore!!! Can you imagine!! 3 babies..not 1, ot 2! I have 7 :noway: but never three at the same time!!! lol :sad: she's due in March and isn't too happy about it.


    And use birth control or your little plan may not work out so well...

    Just an FYI on the birth control... my husband and I have switched three times now because the first one failed, resulting in our third child born in 06. The second one failed, resulting in the birth of our fourth child born in 07 (Mirena-I hate you for making me one of your freaking .01%), and the third one failed resulting in the birth of our fifth child, born in 10. So yeah...I told my husband he had to get a vasectomy. I'm scared to death about that even--considering I was born after my mother had a freaking tubal ligation!!! :o

    sometimes nature has it's own plan that outweighs all of our best laid plans... :)
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    Like it or not society is filled with stereotypes and what are considered social norms.
    They will likely never change so just do as you wish and don`t worry over it.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
    Child Free by Choice offends some people, but you know what?

    They'll live.
  • Amineral
    Amineral Posts: 24 Member

    hahaha thats funny
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,716 Member
    Just an FYI on the birth control... my husband and I have switched three times now because the first one failed, resulting in our third child born in 06. The second one failed, resulting in the birth of our fourth child born in 07 (Mirena-I hate you for making me one of your freaking .01%), and the third one failed resulting in the birth of our fifth child, born in 10. So yeah...I told my husband he had to get a vasectomy. I'm scared to death about that even--considering I was born after my mother had a freaking tubal ligation!!! :o

    sometimes nature has it's own plan that outweighs all of our best laid plans... :)

    No offense intended, but I kind of don't want to be within 10 feet of you at any time...
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