Just A Fad
netsirk12
Posts: 220 Member
This is what my husband said to me today. He said, "your diet is just a fad". I informed him that its not a diet and it is a lifestyle change. I know I will slip up here and there but losing weight is a slow process. I didnt gain it overnight and it will take just as much time if not longer to get it off and keep it off. I can still eat ice cream and pizza but it needs to be in moderation. He then said " IF you do lose the weight I doupt you will be able to keep it off". Someone who is suposed to be my biggest supporter basically just told me I suck and to learn to deal with how I look. I have lost 23 lbs since October and I have much more to go but I am not giving up. It is just heart breaking when someone who is suposed to suport you dosnt beleive in you. 
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Replies
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Punch him in the balls!0
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Quite honestly, he's probably just afraid that he coudn't do it and is projecting it on you (as well as being worried about what effect your new lifestyle will have on him and his meals!). In any case, the best thing you can do is prove him wrong! Won't it be great to be able to tell him "I told you so" and to bring him around to be a believer?
You do your thing and take care of you... bet your success and confidence will rub off on him!0 -
You are not alone. My family thinks the same thing. I am doing it for myself whether they think it's a fad or not. I'm not going to let them detour me from my goal. You've already done a great job on your journey. 23lbs is a great accomplishment!0
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Wow.. I don't really get support form my fiance (but he's just a very quite person whom, works completely opposite hours than me). My co-workers and friends at work are the BEST! I tell them my progress and they are so excited for me. Even the guy friends know i want to loose 100 lbs. I told one of them and he said I'd be a skeleton..i laughed. Anyway, you can do it..
One of my favorite sayings : "No matter how slow you go, you are lapping everyone on the couch" Plus we are here for you.
^.^0 -
Punch him in the balls!
AND LIGHT HIM ON FIRE!0 -
Punch him in the balls!
I second!!!0 -
Punch him in the balls!
AMEN!0 -
Butthead!!! Do it for you girl....he may not be there in a few more years!0
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Such a shame to hear. I wouldn't ever tell anyone something like that. A partner is supposed to be the one who has the most faith in you, ideally anyway. All I can really say is keep going at it to prove him wrong. You've done great so far!0
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I have always had an unsuportive family. At 170 I was overweight but I was told by my parents to eat something because I look sick. Now I get "23 lbs, thats nothing, your still fat" UGH. I just never thought my husband would be unsuportive. It hurts. Hes 125 lbs 5 '8 and he eats MD every day for lunch. He eats more calories in 1 day then I do in a week. Part of the reason I gained so much weight was due to the unhealthy foods in our house.0
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Just keep that in the back of your mind for motivation...in a few months when your all slim and sexy and he is still the same old him..lol0
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Wow.. I don't really get support form my fiance (but he's just a very quite person whom, works completely opposite hours than me). My co-workers and friends at work are the BEST! I tell them my progress and they are so excited for me. Even the guy friends know i want to loose 100 lbs. I told one of them and he said I'd be a skeleton..i laughed. Anyway, you can do it..
One of my favorite sayings : "No matter how slow you go, you are lapping everyone on the couch" Plus we are here for you.
^.^0 -
I love your favourite saying!0
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Maybe he's worried that you'll get too hot for him & dump him! Since he's such a jerk you may not want to wait!0
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I have always had an unsuportive family. At 170 I was overweight but I was told by my parents to eat something because I look sick. Now I get "23 lbs, thats nothing, your still fat" UGH. I just never thought my husband would be unsuportive. It hurts. Hes 125 lbs 5 '8 and he eats MD every day for lunch. He eats more calories in 1 day then I do in a week. Part of the reason I gained so much weight was due to the unhealthy foods in our house.
Um, tell him if he's not supportive, you have a way of losing 125 pounds of worthless weight pretty quickly.0 -
Maybe he's worried that you'll get too hot for him & dump him! Since he's such a jerk you may not want to wait!
^^^ THIS ^^^0 -
WOW just WOW I am sorry he is not being supportive!!
My husband is supportive but like its a wow hun i lost a pound and thats good lmao he does not get it personally cause he has always been small and can eat like 5 burgers and lose 10 pounds lol He has said to me joking (but we all know there is a little truth in some type of joking) said dont go leaving when you lose this all and stuff like that cause he is insecure. I laugh cause i was thin when he met me lmao but your husband might just be afraid of the attention and confidence u have.0 -
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Um, tell him if he's not supportive, you have a way of losing 125 of worthless weight pretty quickly.
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haha love it!0 -
Sounds like insecurity to me!
Use his doubt as inspiration. You're a woman. You're always right... It comes with the vagina. Just let this be another thing to say 'I told you so!' On.
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I'm sorry to hear this. I know it has to be disheartening, especially since you've already shown you can do it. I'm glad to hear that it won't discourage you from continuing. Good for you!0
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Sadly some people (even those who say they love us) are so mean and hurtful to us. You have got to create boundaries even with your husband, especially if he is not encouraging you to be a better you. It sounds to me that he has some insecurities and is fearful of how your self esteem IS going to skyrocket and he is not going to be able to handle it. I know you love him and I will not bash him, but you must love you before you can love anyone else. So keep on loving you and dropping those pounds:)0
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I have always had an unsuportive family. At 170 I was overweight but I was told by my parents to eat something because I look sick. Now I get "23 lbs, thats nothing, your still fat" UGH. I just never thought my husband would be unsuportive. It hurts. Hes 125 lbs 5 '8 and he eats MD every day for lunch. He eats more calories in 1 day then I do in a week. Part of the reason I gained so much weight was due to the unhealthy foods in our house.
Um, tell him if he's not supportive, you have a way of losing 125 of worthless weight pretty quickly.
I'd share that with the parents too...sorry, OP, you're in a tough place!0 -
Wow!!! If my husband said that I'd #$$%%&&&&&****##$%&*-&%$#!!!!!!!!!:mad:0
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Wow, that's tough. Maybe he'll finally see that you're serious about your weight loss and change his tune? If not, well... there might be bigger problems to deal with in the relationship. That's just extremely hard to deal with when you're with someone who basically kicks you when you're down and struggling to get up. *hugs* Hope it gets better...0
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Good Luck!
My husband is very unsupportive as well.
He comes from an obese family and has no concept of health.
He does admit it's insecurity and jealousy now.
Hope things get better!0 -
Unfortunately, it sounds like he wants to keep you where you are. Perhaps he's afraid that if you lose the weight you will gain confidence and move on to someone else. People who tend to bully or put down others tend to do so to make themselves feel better because of their own insecurities. I'm sorry that you are in an unsupportive home situation. I hope that you can always at least come here and draw some support, inspiration and motivation from all the people who are proving just how successful you can be. And 23 pounds is nothing to scoff at. You are on your way. The only one that can stop you is YOU...just tune out the noise of those who would hold you back!0
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Tell him "you better hope I reach my goal, because you aren't getting any loving until I do"!0
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I know how you feel. Last night I said I was going to do an hour straight on the treadmill (i am just getting started) and my husband laughed instead of encouraging me. Might I ad he sat on the couch in the same room and ate ice cream while I did my hour0
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Wow that sucks, I'm sorry!! Have you been overweight throughout your whole relationship? Maybe he's afraid that you'll leave him when you lose weight. I don't know what advice I can give you, he's not being very supportive at all.
23lbs lost since October is awesome!! You just keep it up, you're doing a great thing for your health!!0 -
Yuck!
But I would like to remind you not to call them "slip ups", they are choices. And we have choices to eat the yummy food that will throw us over the cals somedays.. it's ok.. It's OUR choices .. not slip ups.
I hate that when people tell me, "But aren't you on a diet or watching yours cals or something". I say "yeah and this is included!"
It's sad that people think you can't eat fun and yummy while losing a couple of lbs along the way. Good Luck to you and stay strong. It sounds like your husband is becoming jealous and a lot of men do worry that their wife will leave them once they are thin. Sounds like you need to have a heart to heart with him and remind him that you aren't going anywhere.. you just want to be healthier so you can be around longer!0
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