Do you get told "You don't need to lose any weight"

Froggeh
Froggeh Posts: 148
edited November 8 in Motivation and Support
I'm 5'8 and currently 160lbs. Once upon a time I used to weigh 130lbs. 30lbs may not sound like a lot, but since I've gained the weight I always feel lazy, tired, and unattractive. Any time I mention wanting to lose weight, 75% of the time the reaction is "You don't need to lose weight!" But I'm just not happy with the way I am. I felt so much better when I was 130lbs. Does anyone else have this problem with people?
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Replies

  • misskerouac
    misskerouac Posts: 2,242 Member
    I had a big long thread about this yesterday, look up "FB friends don't get it". Tons of people have this same thing happen. I'm going through it with my friends and I'm 5'7" 178lbs.

    It sucks, you should be able to feel like "you" and only you know what weight you feel comfortable with.
  • Froggeh
    Froggeh Posts: 148
    Exactly. I feel like people don't care what I'M comfortable with. If they think I'm fine they just seem to get mad at me!
  • cscgal
    cscgal Posts: 27
    I am going through the same thing! Not only at home but the gym as well just the morning a lady asked why was i even there as i only had one fat roll! I was livid needless to say i replied I WANT to remain active for ME!! Not only that but it doesnt matter what others think as long as your happy
  • Froggeh
    Froggeh Posts: 148
    I am going through the same thing! Not only at home but the gym as well just the morning a lady asked why was i even there as i only had one fat roll! I was livid needless to say i replied I WANT to remain active for ME!! Not only that but it doesnt matter what others think as long as your happy

    Oh my gosh! That would make me SO mad if I was trying to work and someone criticized me for it! That's why I plan on working out at home. I tried running/walking in our neighborhood last year, but these couple of neighborhood guys kept whistling and hooting at me and it just creeped me out.
  • pucenavel
    pucenavel Posts: 972 Member
    Yes



    ... but then I lift my shirt and show them how much belly fat I can pinch.

    The comments generally stop at that point.





    Then again, maybe I've just sickened them into silence. :laugh:
  • bpurc22
    bpurc22 Posts: 180 Member
    I get told this all the time. My response is: I'm not really even trying to lose weight, I'm trying to be healthier and define my body better. People seem to have something against other people dieting and exercising, it's like we all don't want to fall behind and would rather other people be fat than themselves diet and exercise.
  • StrongGwen
    StrongGwen Posts: 378 Member
    your story could almost be mine! I am also 5' 8" and CW is 159, but my goal wt is 142 (I actually do have big bones!). People tell me I don't need to lose weight, but like you I just can't feel like myself and don't like how I look at this weight. But I live in Mississippi, the #1 most obese state in the USA, so in comparison to most of the people I do not seem to be overweight!
  • Going4Lean
    Going4Lean Posts: 1,078 Member
    I hear it all the time. they don't that get now i am just trying to tighten up and loose the last bit of gut.
  • Froggeh
    Froggeh Posts: 148
    I get told this all the time. My response is: I'm not really even trying to lose weight, I'm trying to be healthier and define my body better. People seem to have something against other people dieting and exercising, it's like we all don't want to fall behind and would rather other people be fat than themselves diet and exercise.

    I should try responding the way you do, maybe the people that give me a hard time wouldn't be so hard on me.
  • bpurc22
    bpurc22 Posts: 180 Member
    Yeah it will make them feel stupid in a way. They'll walk away thinking, "Why WOULDN'T anyone want to have a better body and be healthier?" There just seems to be that negative notion surrounding the phrase "losing weight"
  • swimmchick87
    swimmchick87 Posts: 458 Member
    Yup. I think so many people are obese that people don't even realize how thin you really have to be to be in the "healthy" bmi range. I think people think you can look "chubby" and still be at a "healthy" weight or not "medically overweight" but that is simply not true. The thinnest I've been recently (about a year ago) is just 5 pounds under the cut off for the "overweight" bmi and I was a size 6. I'm 5'4 and 154 pounds, which I feel like is pretty "average" in today's society...but it IS actually overweight!
  • DavyHolly
    DavyHolly Posts: 44 Member
    My boyfriend tells me often that I don't need to lose weight, but I've got to do it for me. I know he loves me the way I am, but that does not change the fact that I am scientifically overweight xD
  • hbunting86
    hbunting86 Posts: 952 Member
    Yes! All the flipping time!

    I'm 5'4'' and 130lb-ish and want to lose 10-15lb. My frame is really little so you can tell that I'm carrying extra weight. The body fat % test also confirmed this - but STILL people ask why I'm going to the gym, and why I'm watching what I eat... it's frustrating! The fact that I'm running a 17k in March means that I HAVE to take exercise and my diet seriously.. which people don't get. Particularly my flatmates! All 3 of them would be easily in the obese or morbidly obese category (think out of breath walking up stairs) but they laugh at my attempts to be fitter, healthier and happier with the way my body feels (incidentally I don't own a pair of weighing scales, so I'm not a scale junkie!).

    My advice would be to just stick with what makes YOU happy with your body and your health. If people want to criticize turn the criticism back on them - tell them why WOULDN'T you want to be fitter, healthier and happier?

    H :smile:
  • nwhitley
    nwhitley Posts: 619
    I hear this ALL the time. I am 5 feet and currently weight 115. I don't necessarily want to lose, but I don't want to gain either. I am trying to live a healthy lifestyle by eating properly and exercising, as everyone should do. This is NOT just for people who physically look overweight. Plus, I want to be a good role model for my 12 year old son. Right now, he is on a cross country team and loves running and so do I. I want him to make this a lifelong habit and not ever fall into bad habits. With all of that said, I wouldn't mind losing 10 pounds :smile:
  • k_braddock
    k_braddock Posts: 51 Member
    I haven't even posted on Facebook that I'm losing weight because I know that I'll hear "You don't need to lose any weight!" I'm 5'6" and was 165 lbs when I started MFP. I want to get back to my normal 140 where I'm most comfortable. I felt huge at 165 and was technically in the overweight range. From now on, I'm not going by what anyone else says, I'm going by what I feel.
    That doesn't mean that I have to hear it from them though! :happy:
  • sagetracey
    sagetracey Posts: 607 Member
    I have lost more than one-third of my body weight so I do get comments about not needing to lose any more weight. I just put those down to the massive change that people see in me. I know that I need to lose more to become healthy and am keeping at it.

    On the other hand, my DH, who is my greatest champion and supporter, has joined me in my exercise regime of walking, cycling, dancing and swimming, and the kilos are just dropping off him, even though he doesn't actually (healthwise) need to lose any weight. I was surprised to realise that I was annoyed at how easily he was losing weight, i.e. he wasn't even trying and I gave him the old, "you don't need to lose any weight" line. Then I realised I was jealous of his success (cos now he is looking quite buff!) and that I should and can support him as much as he is supporting me.
  • dHowe4406
    dHowe4406 Posts: 114
    All the time. Even when I started and I was at 266lbs. That was way to big for me but my friends said I was find and didn't need to lose any weight. Now that I have lost 68 lbs they said I don't need to lose any more weight. But I'm not happy with the weight I'm at and I know I still need to lose the wight.
  • HotBodUnderConstruction
    HotBodUnderConstruction Posts: 420
    That's why I just keep my goals to myself! Everyone always has an opinion...even if you don't ask for one!!
  • Froggeh
    Froggeh Posts: 148
    I haven't even posted on Facebook that I'm losing weight because I know that I'll hear "You don't need to lose any weight!" I'm 5'6" and was 165 lbs when I started MFP. I want to get back to my normal 140 where I'm most comfortable. I felt huge at 165 and was technically in the overweight range. From now on, I'm not going by what anyone else says, I'm going by what I feel.
    That doesn't mean that I have to hear it from them though! :happy:

    I won't post on Facebook either because I don't think my friends would be supportive.
  • CannibalisticVegetarian
    CannibalisticVegetarian Posts: 1,255 Member
    I'm down a couple of pounds (was 278) and now that people see me, they tell me that I don't need to lose anymore weight. Through my eyes, 197 isn't where I need or want to be, but on a daily I have family and neighbors tell me otherwise. It's infuriating, though I know that deep down they mean well.. and so do I when I drown 'em out.
  • Froggeh
    Froggeh Posts: 148
    I'm down a couple of pounds (was 278) and now that people see me, they tell me that I don't need to lose anymore weight. Through my eyes, 197 isn't where I need or want to be, but on a daily I have family and neighbors tell me otherwise. It's infuriating, though I know that deep down they mean well.. and so do I when I drown 'em out.

    You have to do what makes YOU happy. :smile:
  • hiker282
    hiker282 Posts: 983 Member
    Maybe don't make it about weight loss but about becoming more physically fit. I'd think people would have a hard time saying, "you don't need to be able to run a mile faster." or "You don't need to not want to hate feeling winded after climbing a flight of stairs."
  • Froggeh
    Froggeh Posts: 148
    Maybe don't make it about weight loss but about becoming more physically fit. I'd think people would have a hard time saying, "you don't need to be able to run a mile faster." or "You don't need to not want to hate feeling winded after climbing a flight of stairs."

    Love this :smile:
  • kathy_nyc
    kathy_nyc Posts: 9
    Yup for sure!
  • rajivdubey
    rajivdubey Posts: 382 Member
    All the time!!
  • andreacord
    andreacord Posts: 928
    My Grandma used to pretty much make comments that I was fat without actually using said word, and then I lost twenty pounds and I was getting "too skinny".. yeah no I'm still packing around a nice gut.
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
    To answer: Nope. I have not been told that.
  • Jenscan
    Jenscan Posts: 694 Member
    Me neither. When I tell people I need to lose about 10 more pounds, I actually get the look of: "oh honey, you need to lose far more than that. you poor dear."
  • ImSoPerfectlyFlawed
    ImSoPerfectlyFlawed Posts: 127 Member
    All the time
  • lr8812
    lr8812 Posts: 111
    Yep. I'm 5 "9, 165 now. Was 205. I should be getting down to 150's soon then maybe more. People say you look too thin now. But I'm not! Still have a belly to work on losing. Almost done too. I did lose all over though.
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