Anyone else disappointed when they reached their goal weight
JessicaEPope
Posts: 88 Member
Hi I'm 5ft 4 and I have weighed in at 115lbs for the last few days (my goal), and have lost nearly 3 stone from my starting weight (158lbs).
Despite reaching my goal weight, which i didn't really think would happen anyway, I don't feel very happy with the results. I am frustrated I didn't take any before pictures to show myself how far i've come and instead still see the parts of me i'd like to change.
I'm thinking about changing my weight goal to a lower number, still within the healthy BMI range but see what happens if I continue doing what I'm doing and hope my body changes a little more.
I realise that I need to change my ideas on how i look, but just wanted to know if this was common with people meeting their goal weight???
Despite reaching my goal weight, which i didn't really think would happen anyway, I don't feel very happy with the results. I am frustrated I didn't take any before pictures to show myself how far i've come and instead still see the parts of me i'd like to change.
I'm thinking about changing my weight goal to a lower number, still within the healthy BMI range but see what happens if I continue doing what I'm doing and hope my body changes a little more.
I realise that I need to change my ideas on how i look, but just wanted to know if this was common with people meeting their goal weight???
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Replies
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Believe me what you've lost is fantastic and you should remind yourself of that achievement! Lots of folks lose the weight become restless because you don't lose the weight just to stop and revert to your old lifestyle.
Maybe something to help is to now stop focusing on the number of lbs you are, and focus on the fitness side. You said there are still areas to be worked on, start there, get into weight fitness, check out youtube, there is a great channel of this chick who is hardcore (of course i've forgotten the channel name, charlie*something*... search 'burpees') or her website is bodyrock.tv )....maybe you'll find that fulfilling.
Also, if you haven't already join a sport of athletic activities group, like via craigslist or something. Find other to share your new passion for fitness with. I hope these ideas have helped, it's no good to loss all that weight just to be disappointed. Just know, there is a fine line between fitness and skinny... getting too skinny is hurting your health.. but focusing on the fitness side would be better.
Good Luck!0 -
First off you should be very proud. Lots of people fail at this game so for you to reach your goals and successfully lose weight, I think that's great and congrats.
I also think that most people fail to consider body composition when setting their goals and consequently they take the wrong path in their attempt to lose (specifically via not adding resistance training and to a lesser extent, protein deficient/etc).
I also think that it's common for people to think "I need to lose X lbs and I'll look great" then they do that and realize they needed to lose quite a bit more to get their body to look like what they expected initially.
The latter of these two comments happens all the time in the bodybuilding forums when guys who are out of shape start bodybuilding and immediately head into the fat loss section and start learning about how to cut. You'll have someone who is 5'11 and 240 thinking that they'll look ripped at 210 when in reality they'll need to push into the 170s to really get what they were expecting.
In your case though it just sounds like you should look at body composition and stop worrying about the scale so much at this point. Lift heavy and eat at maintenance and see what changes your body makes in the following months.0 -
well instead of lowering your goal weight why not shoot for a figure goal, and forget about the scale altogether? Now that you have reached your goal weight, concentrate on core strength and toning up, maybe building muscle. you have come a very long way,!! be happy!!!0
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Thanks for your replies, glad anyone even looked at my post!
My job has been a major factor in helping me lose weight as it involves lots of heavy lifting and power walking all day, which I do believe has been a driving force in helping me lose weight.
I think perhaps looking at what I eat may help me look better, and perhaps some kind of lifting or 30DS type thing. However, I've tried 30DS for a few days before and although for a lot of people, i can appreciate they are amazing at getting results, I need to be able to function well at work, therefore can't be sore the next day or i wont physically be able to work my job properly.
I'm happy at what the scales say now, still suprised at the number because what I see in the mirror doesn't match up to what i expected, just trying to figure out how to change that!
Hopefully just continuing to work and eat well, my body could possibly improve, particularly if I ate more and better perhaps? I should probably start educating myself on better eating now... :S0 -
Hopefully just continuing to work and eat well, my body could possibly improve, particularly if I ate more and better perhaps? I should probably start educating myself on better eating now... :S
Lift weights in a gym with a pre-written beginners program and use progressive resistance (add weight over time so that you're lifting heavier loads). Consume sufficient protein. Come back in 4 to 6 months.0 -
Absolutely do your research on healthly eating! And don't be afraid to get sore from weight training... It will hurt for a day or two... just tough it out at work and then you'll notice it doesn't hurt, and you may even feel stronger.
Just remember eating more only applies if you are working out to balance it. Fitness folks easily consume 1500+ calories a day, and I'm being modest, most super fits consume over 2200+ because of all the things they do, they need that calories to just keep up.
Like everyone has said... hide your scale, throw it out... use your mirror to help you see the changes... and take pictures so you feel and see the changes as they happen!0 -
To me this actually makes a lot of sense. In today's world the standard for female appearances is absolutely ridiculous and unattainable. Even though we know a lot of the photos we see on magazine covers are photoshopped, that doesn't change the inner dialogue and mindset that we are not good enough.
Maybe, like I have done many times before, you had a number of ideas and notions about what life would be like at your goal weight. Maybe you thought you would be happier or more fulfilled. I hope I don't sound like I am assuming things about you I don't know, but this just seems like one possible reason why you may be feeling disappointment right now.
Losing weight and being able to feel healthier is a wonderful thing, but it is not everything. No matter what your size, there is still a person inside there that is worth a lot! I feel like a broken record, but I highly recommend checking out the author Geneen Roth. She wrote an amazing book called Women Food and God. It is not a religious book. It is probably the most truest and eye opening self help book I have ever come across and changed the way I view eating and my own body forever. I have never read anything that made such an impact on the way I see myself.
In any case, take care
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Not disappointed, but I'm within a few pounds of it, and definitely am readjusting my fitness goals. I'm not as focused on the scale's number anymore, but instead, need to work harder on toning up the areas that still need attention. Strength training might make the scale go up a bit again, but if it tightens up my 'jiggly bits', its not a bad thing! I also need to clean up my diet a lot more, and get away from processed convenience foods that I tend to rely on.
Saw this quote the other day: "Take pride in how far you've come, and have faith in how far you can go! " You've done a great job, so I hope you can come to realize that you've succeeded at something that a lot of people never manage to do in their lifetime!0 -
I'm 5'4", 115 is my goal, you can't go much lower and maintain a healthy BMI.
Start lifting / building muscle, you'll firm up.0 -
I sometimes feel like my heavier weight filled me out more in the tummy region. Now that im slimmer my tum looks looser and thats one thing I dislike. still havent reach my goal so its nerve racking to think of how it wuld look then.0
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Check out this site: http://www.mybodygallery.com/
It's what has helped me set goals for myself based on what I want to look like. Some of the heights/weights don't have a lot of pictures, but in most cases you still get to see a few different body types. It can also be helpful if the issue isn't so much that you don't have the body you expected, but rather you aren't seeing yourself accurately.0 -
Definitely look into toning, building muscle
Try body pump or general weight lifting at the gym, my preference would be body pump as you have the instructor to help and you do the right moves/reps to tone the whole body0 -
Be healthy...that is all.....0
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I reached my goal weight 8 yrs. ago, after working out and eating right for about a year. I was disappointed.... like, "What do I do now?" Reaching my goal weight didn't change my life the way I'd imagined--- I was still the same shy, anxious person with a pimply face but could fit into a smaller pants size. People complimented me all the time, but I guess I just sort of shrugged it off. And then I wanted to see what I could get away with.... discovered that I could now eat some unhealthy junk and still maintain my weight.... but one candy bar a day, led to 2, and you know where I'm going with this story....
Are you unhappy about your figure, or your life in general?
~Jess0 -
Lift weights in a gym with a pre-written beginners program and use progressive resistance (add weight over time so that you're lifting heavier loads). Consume sufficient protein. Come back in 4 to 6 months.
this0 -
I know how you feel. For me, add age (54), lack of elasticity in my skin and age related muscle wasting. Although I've lost almost 70 pounds and went from size 16 to size 4, my arms, stomach and thighs have sagging skin and although there is definitely some muscle there I feel squishy. I am using weights and know over time it will help, but I can see this will really be difficult for me to get what I was hoping for, too. As with weight loss, the best we can do is keep shooting for our goals. My realistic goal was to improve my health and look better fully dressed. I have more than accomplished both and am happy with that.
Best of luck to you.0 -
ThisIn your case though it just sounds like you should look at body composition and stop worrying about the scale so much at this point. Lift heavy and eat at maintenance and see what changes your body makes in the following months.0 -
I agree with most people on here. I'm not sure you have to lose anymore weight, I think maybe what your unhappy with is your "shape" and the only way to change that is with weights and fitness!! Give the scale a break and try to focus on strengthing and perhaps building a little muscular curve.....I have a feeling you'll LOVE the results!!!! And congrats on reaching your goal weight....if you can do that...you can commit to some fitness! =-)0
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I am nowhere near my goal weight, but many years ago in my 20's and 30's I was. I recall that the smaller I was, the more hypercritical I became of my body. I would inspect it from every angle in the mirror for long periods of time. Seeing pictures of myself never gave me joy because there was always something I didn't like. Now, I look at those pictures and say 'I was hot back then. Why didn't I KNOW that?'
I think that as a woman I was always comparing myself to other women. This is a losers' game. You never win. I would say to turn your attention to overall fitness and think of your body as a precious temple. Feed, exercise, dress and adorn it like it's royalty. Eventually, the confidence will come.0 -
I think you have MUCH to be proud of!! You've done the hardest part - losing the weight - now you just need to do some fine tuning (which I think is the BEST part!)
You can focus on toning up and really getting your muscles to shine through. Are you doing weights? Once you've lost a lot of the fat/weight, you can see your muscles much more now and you're able to really shape your form.
I think it's great that you've accomplished one goal and can move towards new ones! Keep at it 0 -
I didn't have a specific goal weight, but I stopped at 131 (I'm 5'5") because I had become "skinny fat," and I hated it. Sure, I was lots thinner, but I was flabby too, and there were areas I wanted to reduce, but didn't want to lose any more weight. So now I'm struggling to increase the cals. and lift heavy, so I can get some muscle. Hope that this will help with the flab, too.0
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Enjoy that fact that you reached your goal. I can't tell you whether I am disappointed or not because I have never reached mine. You should be very proud of yourself. Not everyone can do what you did so don't think so little of what you achieved. I am proud of you!0
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There are days I feel "fat", but then I remind myself how far i've come and how thrilled the old me would have been to be at this weight. I think the new me is thrilled also (sometimes) :-)0
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Well, you are a beautiful girl in my opinion, and I'm sure you are being really harsh with yourself!!! We are our worse critics!0
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I passed my goal weight and goal size a while ago and, although I would have been content (and healthy) at that original goal, I continue to work towards getting stronger and more fit. As that happens, my measurements go down a bit, but I really don't care what the number on the scale says at this point as long as I am taking care of myself and pushing myself to improve and/or maintain my overall health and strength.0
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Goals change , don't be disappointed in what you have accomplished because YOU had the determination to make it happen ! Now change your focus to the things about your body that you don't like and use that willpower you already have demonstrated to set and reach new goals . You are now the master of your body , make it happen .0
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You probably do not need to lose anymore...just tone.0
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Perhaps weight loss was perceived as some magic solution to life's problems. If we see all answers to our problems as "if only I could lose weight" then we are going to be disappointed. It should not be so much about body image but about health and fitness. If we can be active, eat healthy, minimal health problems, and enjoy life, then we will be pleasantly thrilled with what weight loss will contribute to that. BUt, if we continue to see what is wrong with us - then perhaps the issue isn't really weight loss so much as the mental baggage that put us there in the first place? Sure, did I get saggy parts (age 57) with my 80 pound weight loss? heck yeah! I am still utterly thrilled with being able to keep up with my 5 grandsons, being able to run in races, and no longer being short of breath or unable to do stuff because I'm simply too fat and out of shape. That's what matters to me. It isn't going to make me prettier. I"m already as gorgeous as I"m going to get! <<<grin>>>0
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Great question. I, too, have reached goal weight. However, I have been one of those "skinny fat" people all my life. I ate badly, was very active, and still had a heart attack two years ago. My goal now FITNESS and HEALTH. I will not to be another statistic with a heart attack in another few years. I now have two grandchildren to live for. You are a beautiful girl, and someone mentioned earlier that this world's idea of beauty is just wrong (paraphrased). The advice and support here is AWESOME. I am re-shaping my body after getting down to my goal weight with weight resistance and cardio to become heart healthy. Because you are still young, you are doing your body a great favor keeping the excess fat off. You can mold your body even more...but your health and original weight loss is to commended!! Take care. Debbie0
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Goals change , don't be disappointed in what you have accomplished because YOU had the determination to make it happen ! Now change your focus to the things about your body that you don't like and use that willpower you already have demonstrated to set and reach new goals . You are now the master of your body , make it happen .
Good advice!0
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