i have a small question???? ........ not vegetarin...... nor

This is a tough situation. I have certain relatives who don't have a lot of money but they enjoy having the family over for meals. So they tend to buy low quality foods. We offer to bring a dish, and when our offer is accepted we bring something healthy, but often times we're told not to bring anything. I do my best fill my plate with the healthier options, but someone always has to make a comment "why didn't you put a (greasy, fatty) hamburger patty on your bun? why aren't you eating more than that? how can you eat salad without dressing? why don't you want cake/pie/ice cream?" I would like to say "I'm not giving you grief about whats on your plate, so why are you giving me grief about whats on my plate?" I usually just say "maybe I'll get that later" and then never do.

For both sides of my family - mine and the in-laws: Ive picked up my car keys in the middle of eating dinner at my parents' house and started heading out the door because of the constant "did you eat enough?" "why arent you eating?" when the plate clearly had food on it (albeit very limited on the healthy), and the "you arent living" comments...

I always ask what they are making, and the same thing is blurted out: "we dont know yet, we are planning"... and this is six hours before the invitation to come over is expected. I want to bring a dish that goes along with what they are serving, and they know it would never be up to 'their' expectations.... meaning every damn thing in the kitchen that could put you in the hospital it is so bad for you.....THATS what they like...

Both my husband and I stopped with the whole going-over-to-someones-house-for-dinner thing because its a really big headache. My husband supports me 150% and will not be a food-pusher ever... he doesnt like it when my mother pulls her usual comments because - well, regardless of the house you are in, its just plain rude.

When it comes down to the phone calls asking if we would like to come over for dinner, we decline each and every time. While I would never expect them to make a separate meal (honestly I dont think they would know how to make the kinds of meals I have to consume! LOL!), but to be very rude and keep pushing food, I find is VERY offensive and I just wont sit there and take it.

Wow, that's a vile thing to say.
Isn't generalising a whole country of people the very definition of xenophobia?

Not at all. The British on the whole ARE xenophobic.

I am vegetarian and my mother in law is a meat eater- she puts meat in everything! I always ask what I can bring bring a side item that I will eat. While this sounds bad- sometimes I just don't go very hungry:) Or- dessert doesn't usually have meat and if you skip the meal it isn't so bad to have dessert once in awhile so sometimes I use that- " the pie you made just looks sooo good that I am saving room for it". Good luck!

I'm a pescetarian. About 6 years ago when I was 16 I just suddenly went off the taste of meat. I got moaned a by my mum and dad, they are big meat eaters and just couldn't understand why but there was no big issue. They occassionally forgot and put meat on my plate but they were always the ones to apologise to me for forgetting. Some people are really undertanding, others find vegetarians offensive and stuck up but its not the case at all. it just depends on the people viewing you.