Question for the men

what kind of games we talking about too?

there is being hard to get and then their is being a b!t#h. however men have forgotten the gentle act of seduction. a woman needs to be wooed and pursued. they don't want to be treated like another notch in the bed post.

Sounds like more games to me. If I need a playbook and an offensive coordinator to date a woman, I'll stick to football.

I'd say bye and that would be it.

I didn't listen to the title, sorry! I think, if you really like the man, GO FOR IT! Don't wait around for him to ask, it will never happen......1 little ride turned down, shouldn't be a big deal! You could have said "NO" because if your mom saw you pull up in a car with a man, she might flip out!!!! Who knows the circumstances!!!! If you WANT it....................GO GET IT!!!! DON'T WAIT!!

I don't think turning down a ride home is necessarily playing hard to get. I like when women are independent and when they do not just throw themselves at guys simply because they think they are cute or have a crush on them or something. Making somebody try a little harder is not going to ruin anything. That being said, I hate when people play games. There is a fine line when it comes to this! I think once you ask yourself if you are playing games you probably are, go with your intuition and everything will be good!

I think you are all taking this out of context. This is only the second time I have really been around this individual (which still kind of makes him a stranger). Signals went back and forth all night. He offered me a ride, but it wasn't far and I had my daughter with me. I politely turned him down. I'm not trying to play games. I just didn't feel it was appropriate. I just thought he might perceive it that way.

I wasn't replying to your specific situation. Just the idea of "playing hard to get" in general. I guess I should've read your original post more clearly.

You declining the ride wasn't playing hard to get at all. At least I wouldn't take it that way. Especially since you had just met and had your daughter with you. If he felt you were playing games in that situation, I don't know that he'd be a guy you should wanna be with anyway.

there is being hard to get and then their is being a b!t#h. however men have forgotten the gentle act of seduction. a woman needs to be wooed and pursued. they don't want to be treated like another notch in the bed post.

Sounds like more games to me. If I need a playbook and an offensive coordinator to date a woman, I'll stick to football.

Oh man, the attractiveness balance is a delicate thing.

Women who play hard to get (works the other way too I suppose) without displaying genuine signals of interest (coy behavior, physical clues like specific looks, playing with the hair, touching his body etc) will usually find him not responding in a way desired. Then she falls into the "why doesn't he like me/what can I do to attract him" mode. This is especially tricky due to the virtual nature of our society.

Now, men LOVE the chase and the win of connecting with a woman (doesn't mean sex, could mean anything - and I have fist pumped out loud when that happens . There's very few rushes so powerful or impactful for a man when that happens. Any guy telling you the opposite is lying to you or to himself.

Then there's the female challenge of wanting to not seem easy sexually but wanting physical intimacy almost as much as the male(maybe some more so). We all know the sexual liberation that is common today and although it's not the 60s, we're damn close. Even then, people want genuine intimacy which is between the ears, not the legs, and is also where great orgasms come from.

This is where the balance comes in. The attractiveness to each other has to be within close tolerances. It never works (long term anyway) when one mate is more attracted to the other, usually the one with the weaker emotions drifts off or falls away completely. Hence the games people play.

In this day where people constantly say "I don't play games or I don't want someone to play games like that with me" usually find themselves doing just that or being played just like that.

Don't think so?

How many of you have received a txt, wanted to respond immediately, but chose to wait a few hours to not seem desperate or too available? That's a game.
How many of you wanted to break the 90s "three day rule" of calling someone? Conventional approach is normally a day in this day of immediate communication and collaboration. Heck, sending a txt just a few hours later is common as well. Also a game.

We all fall into the trap of wanting to present a "cool facade" and yet want the comfort of being ourselves at the risk of alienating that person we want to attract.

It's a delicate balance.

Presenting your authentic self is the way to go. Any other approach will eventually expose that "veneer" and that relationship will crash like the last one if you keep doing the same things. (generally speaking)

Guys ... And girl ... Everyone is making some pretty huge assumptions here. We don't know what the OP means by hard to get! Saying know to a ride home that is a few minutes walk is not playing hard to get. Also, this is yet another incident that cannot be justifiably resolved because no one but the two in question were involved. If she had have said ok to the lift, would the thread be she was too easy?

Personally, I would be more concerned about a guy who is asking personal questions about another member of MFP knowing that she will be able to see the questions and responses. Not very responsible or dare I say, mature. This is something for the two people in question to talk about not MFP world! If think it is very embarrassing for the girl, and him, to have everyone discussing it. Difference being he asked for it and she didn't!

annoying, I'm all for a challenge ,but not playing games..