Poll: Is it Rude to Question the Waiter When Out To Lunch Wi

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Replies

  • hsmithway
    hsmithway Posts: 191
    Responsible!

    Though if my friends and I ask a bunch of questions, I do usually tip a little more generously for the extra time and effort.
  • Bikini27
    Bikini27 Posts: 1,290 Member
    So long as you don't go all Sally from When Harry Met Sally in the pie scene, you're perfect love!
    Respect for your body and for the server will only benefit you in your journey.
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
    Not rude at all. and I used to be a server.
  • Pocket_Pixi
    Pocket_Pixi Posts: 1,167 Member
    I think asking is totally responsible, I will go as far as asking what they use in their recipes - marinades etc... not for specifics like a table spoon of this or w/e but I have such weird food allergies I like knowing what is in the food I am about to eat - especially if it is a place that I haven't been to before.
  • stuffinmuffin
    stuffinmuffin Posts: 985 Member
    I do that most of time!!! My local Italian restaurant now remember to leave the butter off the vegetables and put less cheese on the pizza! ; )

    I do see some people wince when I do it, but I don't see a problem. I was a waitress when I was student and wouldn't bat an eyelid at someone asking me details of how the food was cooked or make reasonable adjustments to the meals.

    Not exactly relevant but I do remember having a verbal tussle with the woman behind the McDonald's counter when I asked for a salad. She kept asking; "Do you want that in a bun or a wrap?"
    Me: "In a box"
    Her: "Bun or wrap"
    Me: Box, a salad in a box
    Her: A bun??
    Me: No, a box

    ...this went on for ages, I could sense my boyfriend wincing beside me! ; ) :flowerforyou:
  • chanalea
    chanalea Posts: 1
    Personally I dont think its rude, but to keep from having incidents like that you should inform your coworkers or the waiter that you are dieting and there are certain things u can have. Just to keep people from looking at u crazy & questioning u. i know i have to inform people before I go out just so they wont think Im trying to be a butthead.
  • 2012asv
    2012asv Posts: 702 Member
    its called being smart! You want to know what you are putting in your body! Your friends should follow suit. Maybe next time order last so everyone's attention isnt on you??
  • mdebbie1026
    mdebbie1026 Posts: 164 Member
    It's the waiter's job to tell you most of the answers if the menu does not specify. If you have questions, you certainly do have the right to ask how the food is being prepared that you will be paying for. I say it is better to ask than to wait till it comes and send it back because it was not what you expected. It was rude of your lunch bunch to state/imply that you were being rude.
  • Helenatrandom
    Helenatrandom Posts: 1,166 Member
    You want to buy what you want, not whatever is put before you.
    (I'm the one who asks if I can substitute something else for french fries. )
  • Sunshine_Girlie
    Sunshine_Girlie Posts: 618 Member
    You're the one putting that stuff in your body. They are serving YOU and most times, places will cater to you, so take it! If they have a problem with it, tell them to kiss your grits. Haha. :-p

    Seriously though. They are getting paid to take your order. It's better to get specifics and get what you really want than to send it back to the kitchen and then have them spit in your food.
  • hiker282
    hiker282 Posts: 983 Member
    I don't see how it would be rude to know what it is you're ordering as long as you're asking politely. Maybe it was something in the way you asked; but I wasn't there so I can't really say. It's best to know what you're ordering before you get it so you don't have to send it back or get something you didn't want.
  • Jennwbs
    Jennwbs Posts: 1
    I think it makes total sense to ask questions like that! It only gets rude when you're asking for the life story of every ingredient on their menu, I think. Frankly it's far more healthy and responsible of you to be asking how your food is being prepared and cooked, than your friends who will just be putting what they're given in their bodies without a second thought :S
  • teacup8285
    teacup8285 Posts: 26
    I think it is great you asked. There is nothing wrong with that at all. They were wrong to even ask! I went out today and asked how many calories were in the dish. He was surprised but found someone to answer my question. I was polite and she was very helpful.
  • Apazman
    Apazman Posts: 494 Member
    I have to say when on a first date this is something I really watch the other person do. I am seeing how she askes questions to our server .. I don't care what questions are asked.. but HOW they are asked. If a date is rude or rolls eyes to a waiter or server, then I don't want anything to do with it.

    Sometimes its not what we say .. but how we say it!
  • lutzsher
    lutzsher Posts: 1,153 Member
    Your co worker sounds like the type of person to eat what she is served even if it is wrong . . . just so they don't have to "make waves".
    I think making waves mades you informed and smart about your choices . . . really . . . have any of us thought it was actually rude???
  • melloneill16
    melloneill16 Posts: 38 Member
    All my friends make fun of me for "altering" the food prepared and being a pain at every sitting, it made me self concious for a while, then I GOT OVER IT! Why should they dictate what goes in my body? I Say "your glad I'm here and should enjoy my company!"

    I now no longer apologize for caring what goes in MY BODY!
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    The people with you might have been irritated or annoyed, especially if they weren't eating healthy. Some people will never question a waiter, to them it's embarrassing. But as a waitress, I will tell you what I know and find out what I can't!! I work in a smaller kitchen and the big kitchen is upstairs. I will call upstairs or go upstairs to try and help you out!
  • JennW130
    JennW130 Posts: 460 Member
    not rude! you have a right to find out what the heck your eating!
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    Plus, if your server is super accommodating, you're more likely to tip well, and servers like that :)

    That's one thing I believe in... tipping well for great service!
  • MystiqueASAP
    MystiqueASAP Posts: 747
    Not rude. I do this all the time, whether dieting, allergies, or just wanting my food prepared a certain way; as long as it is done tastefully.
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    I think it's weird that they would think that's weird. I aske questions all the time, and when I was a server it was my job to know about the food so that I could answer questions as part of my job.

    Well, it was 7 years ago (I don't remember for sure, but I wasn't a mom, lol). so I'm thinking maybe people didn't care as much about health back then.
  • Bentley2718
    Bentley2718 Posts: 1,689 Member
    As long as you ask them politely, I see no problem with it. I'm vegetarian, and I always ask a ton of (possibly annoying) questions about what is in my food, including the ever popular "is there chicken or some other type of meat stock in that?" Half the time they look at me like I'm crazy, then go ask the kitchen, and sure enough, there is. I'm polite, and I tip well, if they think I'm rude just for asking, well, I guess that's life. My husband is a little embarrassed by it sometimes though.
  • kbw414
    kbw414 Posts: 194
    You're paying for the inflated cost of food at the restaurant. The server's job is to SERVE you. That's how they earn their tip. Ask away!
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Not rude. If you asked for a zillion different changes and substitutions to a menu item, that might be a bit much, but there's nothing at all wrong with asking for clarification.
  • Maria_Goose
    Maria_Goose Posts: 247
    Is it polite to ask people if they they always want to know what their choices are so they can make the right one? Maybe...
  • BellydanceBliss
    BellydanceBliss Posts: 330
    responsible i do the same thing and if the waiter or waitress doesnt like it they get no tip lol. I was a waitress years ago and i never minded if someone asked me about food.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    I don't think it's rude at all as long as you ask politely.

    I do the same thing :)
  • BrownEyedJerseyGirl
    BrownEyedJerseyGirl Posts: 97 Member
    I don't think it's rude at all and I have done it to be responsible.. Yesterday I went to lunch with a co-worker. I ordered the grilled chicken salad and I asked if the chicken was prepared with any oils - the server checked with the cook and said yes but they could prepare it without the added oil. My co-worker looked at me strangely at first but then said it was a good question and she ordered the same. No point ordering grilled chicken if they are going to add oil.
  • ElleOQuent
    ElleOQuent Posts: 429 Member
    Sometimes it's not what you say, but rather how you say it that can come off as being rude.

    If you asked in a gentle manner, then I'd say it was responsible.

    If you asked in a more abrupt tone, however, I could see why your coworkers would question your actions.
  • ShaSimone
    ShaSimone Posts: 270 Member
    Absolutely NOT rude!! Any waiter/waitress worth tipping will know the answer to all your questions...and if they don't know they will find out and tell you.
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