How to get serious?

Options
joconnor09
joconnor09 Posts: 124
in Introduce Yourself
I just joined a couple days ago. I've been on and off diets for most of my life (even during childhood) and nothing has ever stuck. I've been overweight my whole life, but in the past few months to a year I managed to become obese. Though my weight has steadily increased over the years, it really went up when I started college. The freshman 15 turned into the freshman-junior 50. I used to play sports and was a lot more active in high school, and I just never found a good way to replace those workouts. I'm worried that I'm on track for a number of different diseases and possibly premature death, so I want to get in control of my health before any of that happens.

I'm 5'7", 217 pounds. I'm looking to get down to 145- that seems a like a good, healthy weight for someone of my height. I haven't weighed that much since probably about 7 or 8 years ago, when I was just starting high school! I have no idea what it's like to be skinny, so this will definitely be a new experience for me. I have a tendency to overeat, to eat when I'm bored, and to eat foods that don't have much nutritional value (shocking, right?)

My biggest problems have been motivation. I always start a diet, only to lose all my motivation within a week or two. Even going to the gym didn't really work- as soon as I got even a little busy, I stopped going. I really need help staying motivated. I can't seem to hold myself accountable- I've got to be accountable to someone else. My workouts were always better when someone else was telling me what to do and pushing me. Same with eating- if someone else gets judge-y, I eat better (I hate them, but I eat better). If it's just me, the calories just never stop.

Does anyone have a good way to stay motivated? The calorie counter on here is pretty good- just seeing how many calories I'm eating is already helping me cut back (though I'm just cutting back on foods I normally eat, not eating better foods). The biggest thing is exercise for me. I need help!

Replies

  • lilcmac22
    lilcmac22 Posts: 47 Member
    Options
    It sounds like our stories are similar. The thing that helps motivate me the most though are my friends here on MFP. They are the ones daily encouraging me to keep it up, so I would jump in and find a few friends to add to go on the journey with you. Then, never stop logging in. It is not a get fit quick scheme- I gained pounds the first two weeks! It is a lifesyle change. I had to learn to cook, and still learning, just because I needed to eat better than eating out could produce. Also, find exercise that works for your schedule. For example, I do not honestly have time to go to a gym every day so I have workout DVD's at home, a treadmill, and a bike/tennis shoes for the outside on beautiful days. I vary my workouts so they do not get boring and plan ahead on what I will be doing during the week. If you think that going to the gym is going to get old really quick, then find realistic exercise that works for you. Remember you exercise to eat. Feel free to add me if you want too!
  • Cross_fitter
    Cross_fitter Posts: 30
    Options
    Hi and well done for recognising your needs.
    I can give you many tips on what to eat in terms of the Paleo way of eating which is:
    6-7 small meals a day, 2-3 hrs apart
    each meal is protein (eggs and meat) and veg/salad ( i personally love veg and it's more filling)
    1-2 pieces of fruit
    1-2 slices of wholegrain bread
    little or no alchohol (the sugar inhibits weight loss)
    Paleo is likened to the hunterer gatherer style of eating becasue it eliminates processed foods and you eat to speed up your metabolism. Basically you need to eat yourself lean!!!
    Another thing, we shouldn't eat exercise calories unless we are already lean as this will not promote weight loss.
    Check out my blog and message me for any other info if you're interested.
    Stay positive, you sound like an amazing person...good luck:)
  • gregavila
    gregavila Posts: 725 Member
    Options
    Personally, and I'm a big believer in this, my motivation all comes from within me. My MFP friends help provide support to keep me going through the slow or tough times but my motivation is all about me.

    I am very much like you. About 10 years ago, I lost 40 pounds as I had swelled up to 242 pounds but after about a year of maintaining I got totally lazy and stopped exercising and then stopped watching what I ate. Well needless to say, the weight started coming back on...first to about 225 pounds which lasted for several years but within the last two years I gained an additional 25 to take me to 251. And with those additional 25 pounds came other problems such as high blood pressure, excessive snoring and sleep apnea, feeling tired and fatigued all the time.

    At Christmas time (8 weeks ago), I just decided that I was tired of being fat, tired of being lethargic, tired of having my health problems continue. It was time for a change - and I was the one who had to make it.

    So I found MFP and got started. I've been extremely diligent about tracking everything I eat, and I mean everything. I started exercising by going for walks and getting back into the gym (which I'd been paying for but never going to) and started moving my body. I am a techie/geek so I bought a BodyMedia FIT and heart rate monitor so that I could track what calories I was actually burning all the time. And I've stuck with it because it is working, because I've met some real supportive people here who cheer for my successes and help push me in the plateaus. But mainly, I've stuck with it because I'm tired of being the fat guy and want to live a healthier life.

    So, I don't want to sound mean or uncaring because I really enjoy pushing my MFP friends to be successful, but maybe you should ask yourself why do YOU want to make this change, why do YOU want to be successful -- especially as you have a history of quitting other efforts before.

    If YOU really want to make this change then we can support you -- but your motivation has to come from within.

    Best of luck and feel free to friend me if you wish...
  • lovinmysoldier
    lovinmysoldier Posts: 156 Member
    Options
    I used to rely on other's for motivation and it never got me anywhere. I didn't want their influence to determine my success or failure, if I was to succeed or fail it would be my fault. Like you I recognized the things that derailed me in the past and I came up with plans to deal with those issues as they arose.

    I would typically get burned out on "diet" food. So I made a point to try something new every 1-3 days. I'd try to pick something that sounded super yummy and got me excited to try new things, now I'm used to my new lifestyle and maybe 1-2 times a month I will look for something new but at least if I notice this becoming an issue I can go back to more often.

    Secondly, I would start out going to the gym and then I would quickly dread going to workout and find every reason why I could better spend my time doing something else, or my workout partner would not show up so by all means I couldn't go alone. So I got into a routine of going at the same time, by myself. You may need to experiment to see what time works best for you but for me 8am is PERFECT. I just roll out of bed, put on gym clothes while I'm still half-asleep. Get kids off to school then go straight to the gym. THEN, I came up with alternative ways of exercising, and I focused on a goal. My first goal was to complete Couch to 5K. It quickly became addicting seeing how much I was improving. I started swimming laps, riding bikes, going for walks/runs, going to gym, taking gym classes. I purposefully didn't do everything at once, I saved things for when I noticed I was getting bored with what I was doing and then I knew it was time to try something new.

    Now over a year later and over 40 pounds lighter, I'm still going.
  • ishallnotwant
    ishallnotwant Posts: 1,210 Member
    Options
    Start out simple by measuring your portions. Don't eliminate any food groups. Maybe try to eat more fresh fruits and veggies if you don't eat them on a regular basis already. Make sure you don't feel too deprived because then you may be triggered to fall off the wagon.

    Do you have any health problems that prevent you from being active? if not, just start out slowly. Create a habit to walk for 20 to 30 minutes each day the first few weeks. Don't try to change everything all at once, it can be overwhelming. It's nice to "see" you here on MFP! I hope this is your year for good health. :flowerforyou:
  • ishallnotwant
    ishallnotwant Posts: 1,210 Member
    Options
    Hi and well done for recognising your needs.
    I can give you many tips on what to eat in terms of the Paleo way of eating which is:
    6-7 small meals a day, 2-3 hrs apart
    each meal is protein (eggs and meat) and veg/salad ( i personally love veg and it's more filling)
    1-2 pieces of fruit
    1-2 slices of wholegrain bread
    little or no alchohol (the sugar inhibits weight loss)
    Paleo is likened to the hunterer gatherer style of eating becasue it eliminates processed foods and you eat to speed up your metabolism. Basically you need to eat yourself lean!!!
    Another thing, we shouldn't eat exercise calories unless we are already lean as this will not promote weight loss.
    Check out my blog and message me for any other info if you're interested.
    Stay positive, you sound like an amazing person...good luck:)

    Seriously. Don't let people who post stuff like this overwhelm you. It's not this complicated. Start slowly by eating many of the same foods you already eat, just in proper portions, and by all means if you are hungry, eat back your exercise cals. There will be plenty of time to learn how to eat clean if you choose to as you go along.
  • joconnor09
    joconnor09 Posts: 124
    Options
    Thanks for all your advice! I really appreciate it. It's given me a lot of different things to consider doing :)
  • 1shauna1
    1shauna1 Posts: 993 Member
    Options
    I would say take it one day at a time. Maybe don't concentrate on the total amount you have to lose, because it can seem like a lot and demotivate you. Focus on five or ten pounds at a time. Reward yourself for reaching these mini goals (not with food, but with fun or frivolous stuff, like going to a movie or getting a manicure). Relax and realize you know what you have to do to get to your goals. As mentioned, work in the exercise gradually. Find something active you like to do and then do it. Good luck!
  • newlife888
    newlife888 Posts: 83 Member
    Options
    Hey, I've been overweight all my life too.

    I think the biggest thing that has helped to motivate me is to realize that I don't want to diet forever. I want to change my life, and it sounds like you want to do the same. That cannot happen with the help of a fad diet. It also cannot happen if you give up after you have one bad meal, or one bad day. So instead of focusing in mistakes, I try to focus on good choices I can make today. This has really helped me, and might help you as well.

    I think counting calories is a good way, it enables you to see how much you are eating, and portions as well. Start making small changes that you can live with in terms of portions and foods.

    With exercise, I think do something you enjoy. If you enjoy walking and listening to music, do that. If you like to walk your dogs, turn that into your exercise time. If you like doing workout videos on mute and watching tv (like me) do that. Whatever form of exercise you enjoy is a good place to start, I think.

    Feel free to add me as a friend if you need support.
  • rednblack84
    rednblack84 Posts: 31
    Options
    Hey, I've been overweight all my life too.

    I think the biggest thing that has helped to motivate me is to realize that I don't want to diet forever. I want to change my life, and it sounds like you want to do the same. That cannot happen with the help of a fad diet. It also cannot happen if you give up after you have one bad meal, or one bad day. So instead of focusing in mistakes, I try to focus on good choices I can make today. This has really helped me, and might help you as well.

    I think counting calories is a good way, it enables you to see how much you are eating, and portions as well. Start making small changes that you can live with in terms of portions and foods.

    With exercise, I think do something you enjoy. If you enjoy walking and listening to music, do that. If you like to walk your dogs, turn that into your exercise time. If you like doing workout videos on mute and watching tv (like me) do that. Whatever form of exercise you enjoy is a good place to start, I think.

    Feel free to add me as a friend if you need support.

    I totally agree with this. Make changes in your life that you can live with for FOREVER! Give yourself a break when you slip, but get right back up on the horse even stronger.

    Find exercises that you truly love doing. If possible, find a group of people who LOVE the same exercises as you do. This makes it so much more enjoyable. For example, I started doing Zumba in January and felt very out of place and self conscious because the class was so quiet. February, enter the regulars who were on hiatus. Now I LOVE my Zumba class. We smile, hoot, and holler. It pushes up along and an hour goes by like nothing. I'm under 140 and I burn 500 calories in an hour and it just makes me feel good.

    Make it something you love and it will be something that you look forward to instead of something you HAVE to do.

Categories