Think Before You Delete A Friend

j1wright · February 2012

I am new and only have a handul of friends. I noticed over the weekend that I had lost a friend. It really hurt. I found out because it was a friend that would comment and post frequently. I felt I was supportive and she was supportive of me. The only reason I could think that I lost her was that I was not eating all my calories and I had my diary open.

There are many reasons why people are not eating enough of their calories and it doesn't always mean they are doing it to lose weight. I tried noting for the day what was going on that day but for some reason it didn't save it. This friend even commented one day on my low calorie intake and I just mentioned that I hadn't gone grocery shopping. I am really struggling with post partum depression and have been put on meds. They have really messed with me. I am still trying to figure out how to deal with an 8 week old baby and this body that I am not used to. Since losing the friend I set my diary on private since I guess I am going to lose friends over it.

I know there are wierdos and creeps that should be deleted as friends......but there are honest good people like me who are looking for friends who are needing to lose weight that really don't need the insecurity of being deleted as a friend. I am sure this is just my post partum depression shining through so I am really sorry if you see this as a rant but needed to get this off my chest. So please think before you delete a friend. What is the real purpose you are deleting them? Thanks!

newfieborn · February 2012

This is my 2 cents worth. I really don't care if someone deletes me. I do like having friends and seeing their progress. However, I am here for me and to lose weight. The encouragement is also great. Look after yourself and don't worry about other people. Just stick to your program and lose the lbs. You can friend me if you like.

bugtrain · February 2012

Same here....I don't judge....I don't know what may be going on in someone's life at the time......if we're concerned that someone is not eating enough,we should ask if that person is ok and feeling well.....just my opinion.Friend me if you want!

Chagama · February 2012

Agree. I don't judge others. I have had some odd days because of things going on at home or work. I assume others have the same daily challenges. If I can help someone I am more than happy to do so, either by offering an opinion if they ask, or just being supportive if that's what they want. That's how I want my friends to be, supportive in general, but willing to help if I ask for something.

MellyMartinson · February 2012

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There are many reasons why people are not eating enough of their calories and it doesn't always mean they are doing it to lose weight. I tried noting for the day what was going on that day but for some reason it didn't save it. This friend even commented one day on my low calorie intake and I just mentioned that I hadn't gone grocery shopping. I am really struggling with post partum depression and have been put on meds. They have really messed with me. I am still trying to figure out how to deal with an 8 week old baby and this body that I am not used to. Since losing the friend I set my diary on private since I guess I am going to lose friends over it.

I had to go on meds after my youngest was born. Sometimes the hormones and having a new baby is just something you cannot take care of on your own. Keep doing what you are doing and it is silly if they deleted you for that. You have a lot on your plate. Just make sure to drink lots of water and get some rest and make healthy food choices. You will get back to where you want to be. It just takes some time. AND you can add me as a friend. I will be your cheerleader.

Hang in there. Being a new mama is hard work.

jskaggs1971 · February 2012

I am new and only have a handul of friends. I noticed over the weekend that I had lost a friend. It really hurt. I found out because it was a friend that would comment and post frequently. I felt I was supportive and she was supportive of me. The only reason I could think that I lost her was that I was not eating all my calories and I had my diary open.

There are many reasons why people are not eating enough of their calories and it doesn't always mean they are doing it to lose weight. I tried noting for the day what was going on that day but for some reason it didn't save it. This friend even commented one day on my low calorie intake and I just mentioned that I hadn't gone grocery shopping. I am really struggling with post partum depression and have been put on meds. They have really messed with me. I am still trying to figure out how to deal with an 8 week old baby and this body that I am not used to. Since losing the friend I set my diary on private since I guess I am going to lose friends over it.

I know there are wierdos and creeps that should be deleted as friends......but there are honest good people like me who are looking for friends who are needing to lose weight that really don't need the insecurity of being deleted as a friend. I am sure this is just my post partum depression shining through so I am really sorry if you see this as a rant but needed to get this off my chest. So please think before you delete a friend. What is the real purpose you are deleting them? Thanks!

These people are not your friends. they are participating in some weird passive-aggressive BS ploy to get you to do things their way. If somebody can't handle the way YOU are managing YOUR goals and YOUR life, then **** 'em. Not worth your time or attention. Get revenge on them -- live well.

Good luck with the PPD, new mom. It's a hard path, but you can completely get past it.

giggles1973 · February 2012

Hi

first congratulations on your baby!! Second... Please feel free to add me as a friend. There are so many times I don't even eat 1200 calories because my allergy medicine kills my appetite. So trust me... I understand. I have 2 kids and when they were both babies... If I had time to pee I was happy let alone make a nutrious meal for myself lol I would NEVER delete a friend if they didn't eat all their calories or went over their calories. And unless you asked anyone to look at your diary for help why would they be looking to see how many calories you were or weren't eating. IMO you are better off without them

Again feel free to add me... I only speak positive as I feel it's the only way to be productive

j1wright · February 2012

Thank you all for your support today. I think I am having an off day and I appreciate your support.

annalee_1 · February 2012

I can say I had to delete someone due to their own abuse of their body with restricting their food to nothing and then beat themselves up for eating a cracker. I would worry everyday about this person and they would never consider anyone's advice. I sent messages to them with no response. I had to let it go.

ChristineW82 · February 2012

I wouldn't let this bother you. It sounds like you already have too much to worry about.

Like others have mentioned some people want others to lose weight and get healthy their way. If you're not on the same track as them they don't want you as a friend. You need to just worry about getting healthy your way and concentrate on the good friends that you do have.

mg720 · February 2012

I am new and only have a handul of friends. I noticed over the weekend that I had lost a friend. It really hurt. I found out because it was a friend that would comment and post frequently. I felt I was supportive and she was supportive of me. The only reason I could think that I lost her was that I was not eating all my calories and I had my diary open.

There are many reasons why people are not eating enough of their calories and it doesn't always mean they are doing it to lose weight. I tried noting for the day what was going on that day but for some reason it didn't save it. This friend even commented one day on my low calorie intake and I just mentioned that I hadn't gone grocery shopping. I am really struggling with post partum depression and have been put on meds. They have really messed with me. I am still trying to figure out how to deal with an 8 week old baby and this body that I am not used to. Since losing the friend I set my diary on private since I guess I am going to lose friends over it.

I know there are wierdos and creeps that should be deleted as friends......but there are honest good people like me who are looking for friends who are needing to lose weight that really don't need the insecurity of being deleted as a friend. I am sure this is just my post partum depression shining through so I am really sorry if you see this as a rant but needed to get this off my chest. So please think before you delete a friend. What is the real purpose you are deleting them? Thanks!

These people are not your friends. they are participating in some weird passive-aggressive BS ploy to get you to do things their way. If somebody can't handle the way YOU are managing YOUR goals and YOUR life, then **** 'em. Not worth your time or attention. Get revenge on them -- live well.

Good luck with the PPD, new mom. It's a hard path, but you can completely get past it.

I have to say that I agree with above. There are some days that I have off days due to my hectic schedule, due to work, due to school (when i was a student, just graduated in December), due to things going on at home, due to stress, due to meds that I take daily simply effecting my hormones and appetite....I don't think it is anyone's place to judge another person. We are all here for support. I personally do not have anyone on my friends list who i notice is eating way below 1200, but i do have some people who have some off days where they are slightly under (800-900) and to be honest unless they ask for me to judge or give them some tips i keep quiet...I am here for support and motivation to reach my goal, i am not here to judge others.

Dstny1957 · February 2012

sorry for your bad experience. This should be a supportive and encouraging journey. It's been a while since I was a brand new Mom, but I still remember how hard it can be. Please feel free to add me as a friend if you would like. We are all trying to get healthy, and that should be a good thing, not something to tear someone down.

AnaVerasGettingFit · February 2012

I forget to log all my food many times (or when I cheat WAY too much and just don't want to see the number)--- it's a wonder I have any friends on here LOL. I hope you are feeling better! There are plenty of nice, supportive people on here. Don't worry too much about that one lost. Where one door closes, another opens, or so they say. I'm sure you have 10 new friends who've taken place of her 1 spot. Have a wonderful day and try to stay positive!

Think Before You Delete A Friend

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