The "Your getting to skinny" remark

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  • mrsknotts
    mrsknotts Posts: 115
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    My coworkers used to do this also. I have a dark sense of humor so I would.play along. If they were ordering take out they would ask if.id like anything, then say 'oh right you dont eat' and id reply 'yeah I brought a piece of lettuce to suck on today. After a wile I think they got the hint that I wasn't going to be phased by their comments
  • ratherbeskiing
    ratherbeskiing Posts: 847 Member
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    I get that a lot as well and I think it mainly stems from them having the image of how you used to look and comparing you to that. I just ignore people who say it now. Until I get to below a normal BMI I'm not "too skinny"

    ^ this is what I say and think. well said.
  • shanlynt
    shanlynt Posts: 754 Member
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    Tbh I'd love to hear someone say that rather than the opposite
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
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    For now, I just smile and nod, but how would you handle this?
    I do the same (I went from a 12 to a 4 and hear that about once a week at work)...I think these people generally mean well, but don't realize how it sounds to us, so I don't think its satisfying to say anything hurtful back to them...

    Congrats on your success!
  • Ro0kins_Wedding
    Ro0kins_Wedding Posts: 295
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    People have told me that I don't need to lose any more weight but I normally refer to my BMI. (Yes I know it's not 100% accurate) and that says I am 22.8 which is in the heathy range. If it was anything below 18.5 then I 'maybe' then I would think I was getting too skinny.
  • mousepaws22
    mousepaws22 Posts: 380 Member
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    This is a difficult situation. I would never say to someone that they're getting too skinny, although I might tihnk it, but I wouldn't think it out of jealousy I would think it out of concern. I did work with a girl who had an eating disorder (she did tell me all about it) and I did ask her once if she was OK because I'd noticed she lost weight, but I didn't say I'd noticed she'd lost weight- if that makes sense. I have to be honest though, I don't like the words thin or skinny. I associate them with "too thin", such as that picture someone posted. I know everyone has a different view but I don't like it when I read on posts and profiles "I want to be thin". I'd rather read "I want to be healthy".
  • carpp107
    carpp107 Posts: 99
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    Great Topic.....My wife has said this to me in reference to my ribcage and stomach.....I tell her that she's just not used to hugging a really fit person....Also, my Mother is always telling me I'm getting too thin....People are just unaccustomed to seeing me at a low bodyfat % and I think it shocks them a bit....especially people I haven't seen in the last year....almost 90 pounds of blubber lost changes how a person looks and it certainly changes how you feel......for the better!!!!!
  • star87cc
    star87cc Posts: 63
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    Some people just comment without even thinking, my fiance's mum said on his slight weight gain 'oh you look better for putting on a few lbs' ... then after a few more she made a comment about him 'putting on too much' and now he's tried to do something about it its 'dont be so ridiculous!' ... *le sigh* you cant always win with everyone lol
  • jamaicanlady
    jamaicanlady Posts: 878 Member
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    A coworker of mine always says stuff like this. The last thing was "be careful of losing too much weight, remember you have big breasts". Pissed me off! I know it's jealousy though because we both had babies "recently", me 1.5 years ago and she a year ago and she's doing absolutely nothing to get the weight off and obviously feels bad about it so she tries to put down what I'm doing. I try not to let it bother me though by picturing how she'll look when I've achieved my dream body.
  • Amy_B
    Amy_B Posts: 2,323 Member
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    I get that a lot as well and I think it mainly stems from them having the image of how you used to look and comparing you to that. I just ignore people who say it now. Until I get to below a normal BMI I'm not "too skinny"
    Same thing here.


    I also think it might be a bit of jealousy. :smile:
  • MJ7910
    MJ7910 Posts: 1,280 Member
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    i would smile and say "well it's better than being too fat" and walk away.

    i hate when guys say it... i dont' care if they want me to be bigger, it's not their choice!
  • claire7090
    claire7090 Posts: 67
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    I have had this as well - have now reached my goal but the last bit was really hard because all the encouragment went and all I got was 'but you are so skinny now why bother!'.

    Let it wash over you - if you are happy in your own skin and healthy that is all that matters. My favourite retort if pushed too hard by people is 'well my BMI is 24 and it would have to below 18 to be skinny (unhealthy) so I think I have a way to go before you can refer to me as skinny!'.

    I am a happy UK size 12 (US size8) I am 5'6" and weigh 149lbs my new goal is to maintain the new me and enjoy my new clothes!
  • VeganInTraining
    VeganInTraining Posts: 1,321 Member
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    Once I got down to my goal weight one of my close friends said that I was boardering one "too skinny" for a couple of weeks. Now that she is used to the new me she doesn't make any comments and I haven't gotten any other comments. (aside from my husband saying, "i was looking at some old pics and you were hot when you were chunky....but you're hot now too so that's good :laugh:) I think they probably just need to get used to the new you

    Generally I just say "well I feel good, and I like the way my clothes fit" if they seem genuinely concerned I thank them for their concern and tell them I don't plan to lose anymore weight but it's hard to run a marathon with 25 extra pounds
  • aprilgicker
    aprilgicker Posts: 395 Member
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    Just say, " no worries, I plan on putting some back on in muscle." If they are commenting like that, they wouldn't now the difference anyway.:ohwell:
  • ValleryK
    ValleryK Posts: 16
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    I ALWAYS take "too skinny" as a complement, because I know I can never actually become "too skinny", due to my unconditional love of chocolate!
  • MrsSWW
    MrsSWW Posts: 1,590 Member
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    Oh you are so right! I'm only halfway to my target and when I say that I get "There'll be nothing left of you!". Well clearly there will, cause it'll still be half a stone heavier than when I met my hubby.

    As long as you are still within the healthy BMI range and feel healthy you are fine!

    :flowerforyou:
  • missy_1975
    missy_1975 Posts: 244 Member
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    "And you're getting a bit too judgemental."

    :laugh: That's brilliant.

    I'd take it as a compliment. My father in law told me last week that I didn't want to lose any more weight (really? So it's up to you what I do with my body?). This from a man who is *ahem*, a little bit round, has diabetes and who accuretly guessed my weight - in front of people - when I first met him (I was more than 20 lbs heavier then).

    I just joke that I'll try and quit throwing up after meals and leave off the cocaine soon :tongue:
  • teamsaris
    teamsaris Posts: 30
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    I get this ALL the time. I just tell them I am happy where I'm at and I worked HARD to get here. I do not share with them that I would like to lose another 10lbs. They can't SEE those 10lbs with my clothes on and I sure as heck am not stripping down just to justify myself.

    Smile, nod, say thank you...then walk away knowing that you are strong, amazing and you are working hard to lead a healthy lifestyle :)
  • MJ7910
    MJ7910 Posts: 1,280 Member
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    i agree with others about jealousy too. i think sometimes other women who don't want to put in the effort get mad when those of us who do put in the effort start to see results.
  • LooseWheel
    LooseWheel Posts: 211 Member
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    All the family thought they could make those comments after my husband lost 23kgs. His Mum said to me I should tell him to stop dieting and losing weight as he's lost enough. I said he isn't on any diet, has never set out to lose weight, he started a fitness program to do just that, get fit. Its a lifestyle change. The changes we have made are for life. A 'diet' is something you start and then stop when you reach a goal. After you stop, it usually all comes back on. So we started a healthy lifestyle change and its done wonders for energy levels, muscle definition, feel good feeling as well as the bonus of the kgs coming off.

    Most people will say it out of jealousy.

    Now people in the family are starting to ask, 'what are you doing now?', 'what diet are you on?'. It is so good to say, no diet at all.

    Just be proud of what you have achieved. Let them know the same thing, you aren't dieting at all, its just a lifestyle change that maybe they should consider taking up and you're there to help them if they want.

    Good on you for achieving what you have so far. It truly does take eating right and getting moving more regularly. cheers.

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