desperatly need motivation!!!!!!!!!! :(

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squarer88
squarer88 Posts: 5
in Motivation and Support
welllll...you could say i was new to this even though i have been signed up for a couple of months but this is a new start and i need some motivation.
i'm at just over 16st at the minute which i HATE! i know myself its not the heaviest that i have ever been but i've got to the point where i am sick of being the fat friend who is always there for other people but is always considered to be an ego boost to so called friends who just want me there to make them feel better and to be the butt of their jokes...because "sarah won't mind"
i'm on here because i would like to actually have the confidence that i pretend i have in front of work collegues instead of having to paint THAT face on...you know they face that you put on in front of people showing that you are 'ok' with who you are, when really you are always panicing that your belly is sticking out too far over your trousers or the skinny girls who have just walked past you are talking about you.....its horrible.
i have tried diets in the past but i'm one of these people who for the first couple of weeks does really well and then someone at work will say something to you or your 'friend' will say something demeaning or patronising and i head straight for the junk food every time. somebody told me that MFP actually works and helps your to lose weight so i'm really hoping that people on here will help me out and give me the motivation i need to actually suceed this time. please help xx

Replies

  • squarer88
    squarer88 Posts: 5
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    bump
  • SillaWinchester
    SillaWinchester Posts: 363 Member
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    I'm here whenever you need motivation!! Why? Because while I was reading this entire post I realized that I'm basically the same. I try to diet, do so well, have a "friend" put me down, then I'm right back at the bottom of the ice cream box like I was before. People are horrible sometimes and they don't see, or don't care, what their words do to people! I get so jealous of the skinny girls that can wear the size nothing clothes and even the most hideous clothes but still look so amazing, whereas I look like a fat ox as someone told me. I'm tired of boys not liking me just because I'm fat, and even worse, when they TELL me that's why. I'm tired of not going to school dances because I look fat in all the dresses. I'm tired of being called names and ridiculed. I'm tired of not being able to run without getting out of breath within 2 minutes. So you know what? I'm doing my best to make a change for myself!

    I know it's hard, mentally, physically, and worst, emotionally... but we can do this! :)

    YOU can do this! :)
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
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    This is blunt honesty...

    The motivation comes fro within. IF YOU WANT IT, GET IT.

    90% of the challenge before you is mental. You need to look at yourself...really look at yourself and define what it is you WANT. My motto...CHOOSE. ACT. SUCCEED. Everything in life is about mental awareness and choices. Choose what you want. Act upon the choices that get you there. YOU WILL SUCCEED.

    It is a mental battle to keep focus and determination. YOU CAN DO THIS.

    Be aware. Be honest. Choose. Act. Succeed.
  • ShalisaClam
    ShalisaClam Posts: 190
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    bump
  • livinginwoods
    livinginwoods Posts: 562 Member
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    You can do it if you want it. One day at a time. Don't give up even if you have a little bump! :heart:
  • hiker282
    hiker282 Posts: 983 Member
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    This is blunt honesty...

    The motivation comes fro within. IF YOU WANT IT, GET IT.

    90% of the challenge before you is mental. You need to look at yourself...really look at yourself and define what it is you WANT. My motto...CHOOSE. ACT. SUCCEED. Everything in life is about mental awareness and choices. Choose what you want. Act upon the choices that get you there. YOU WILL SUCCEED.

    It is a mental battle to keep focus and determination. YOU CAN DO THIS.

    Be aware. Be honest. Choose. Act. Succeed.

    Yeah, this pretty much sums up anything I would say. You need to figure out why you want to make the change and then make sure you have a way of putting a reminder of that reason in front of your face every. single. day. It has to be something you really want, and it does have to come from within. Others will let you down, but your own motivation can always drive you forward toward your goal.

    As my good friend, Dr. Brown always said, "If you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything."
  • squarer88
    squarer88 Posts: 5
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    I know it's hard, mentally, physically, and worst, emotionally... but we can do this! :)

    YOU can do this! :)

    thanks for your reply...and the same goes for you...i'm here if you need someone. i really need the support and apprieciate the add <3
  • lizard053
    lizard053 Posts: 2,344 Member
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    You know the whole phrase "fake it until you make it"? It's never been so true. If you can PRETEND to be what you want, you can BE what you want!
  • Breezewood
    Breezewood Posts: 5
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    My motivation is coming from within. It's what I want. I have goals this summer. I have a horse I want to work with, and I need to lose weight to do it. And I want to be lighter on her back. I want to be more energetic working with her.

    I have a motivation problem too. It's winter and crappy outside and I hate it. I'd rather hibernate, So, I'm starting over on this diet and for now, just eating healthy and watching calories. I have a family member who said, "oh, another diet that won't work. Why bother?" That's more motivation for me to prove them wrong. It was insensitive and not nice to say at all. And that was my own sweet mom.

    I'm tired of being tired. Not having energy. So. Until it warms up and I want to go outside, I'm letting my body take this time to get used to unprocessed foods and all healthy. If I lose weight, great. Otherwise, I'll beef it up when the temps go up.

    Be patient with yourself. One step and one day at a time. The weight didn't come on overnight and it's not going off that fast either. Don't cut yourself down. Do the best you can. Good luck and I hope this silly chatter helped.
  • prettypaula96
    prettypaula96 Posts: 35 Member
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    Wow. Those are some crappy friends, and I can't imagine being in a scenario like that one. But, like you, I have been overweight my entire life. I have managed to maintain a diet for a week or two, do amazing, then I get caught up in life and fall off the wagon. On top of that, I lost my dad when I was a little girl, so I know the emotional toll that can take on the psyche. In fact, that's the biggest hurdle I believe I have to overcome: actually dealing with the loss of my dad, even though it has been 16 years.

    This is why I agree that losing weight is mostly an internal struggle, and peace of mind has to come before the weight loss if you want to stay thin (doesn't mean I've accomplished that yet, but I'm trying the best I can).

    If you ever need any support, I'm here to help, even if I'm on the other side of the globe.
  • annimarg
    annimarg Posts: 6
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    I've started to take photos of myself whenever I weigh in once a week, just a simple full body shot and to see my shape forming is my motivation :) also my exercise n diet buddy/gentleman friend showed me last night 4 litres of water which was the equivalent to how much I'd lost already (its not much but it looks a lot!) and I just burst into tears from "how did I let myself get this big?" to "omg its gone and its never coming back I'm so happy!"

    you will succeed xx :)
  • squarer88
    squarer88 Posts: 5
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    omg! cant believe the support that i am getting all ready. even after just an hour i'm feeling more positive about starting my weight loss journey with you guys :D:D xxxx
  • suzcain
    suzcain Posts: 22 Member
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    Don't kick yourself if you have an off day or an off couple days. Just get back on track. I've lost a total of 64 lbs so far, and it has taken 2 years. There's no "diet" - no fast fix. Be ready for the long haul. I only have 8lbs to go before I'm done. Woo hoo! Here is how I've done it...

    I started first by watching how much I eat - MFP on my phone has REALLY helped on that front. I still eat junk - I don't go a day without candy, but I measure it out, and when I get to my calorie limit for the day, I stop. I know I'm more likely to eat at night, so I eat lightly during the day.

    Second, I decided I wanted to eat more (ha!) and get in better shape after losing about half of what I've lost so far. So I started driving to a really flat neighborhood (mine is really hilly), putting in my earbuds, and listening to music while walking. There is a book called "She Got Up Off the Couch" - and every day when I would start my walk I would think that... She got up off the couch! :o) After a few months, I started walking in my hilly neighborhood.

    When winter started and it got too cold and rainy to walk outside, I joined the gym... And found my true love! Dance-y type aerobics classes. Hip hop, zumba, dance jam... YOU GET TO TWIRL!!! Where else in life do you get to twirl??? I go to these classes 5 days a week, and every day when I wake up, I think, "Which class do I get to go to today?"

    Then about a month ago I added kickboxing one day a week because I need something to help me tone up. I don't really like kickboxing, but it is good for me and I want to look good in a bikini this summer, so I go.

    So... If I can do it, you can do it! I had doubled my weight in 15 years - and ended up shaped exactly like Humpty Dumpty (I don't want to get as low as I was - 92lbs on a 5'1" 25 year old is cute - on a 41 year old, it looks angry and scary). And somebody gave me the nicest compliment a couple days ago. I was saying I was one of those people who is always cold, and she said, "That's because you don't have any meat on your bones." Again... WOO HOO!!!

    One more thing... Years ago when I was looking for a job, I had an interview, and a friend called me beforehand and yelled into the phone, "You can do it! You can do it! If you put your mind to it!" Keep that in mind, too. :o) (I got the job.)
  • annimarg
    annimarg Posts: 6
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    Have you found something to help motivate you yet? :) I agree motivation comes from willpower but some of us just need a little extra something to kick start it !
    omg! cant believe the support that i am getting all ready. even after just an hour i'm feeling more positive about starting my weight loss journey with you guys :D:D xxxx

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