Rant Against Ignorant Advice

24

Replies

  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    There's nothing wrong with offering advice. The problem, IMO, is a person who, instead of offering advice, insists that their way is the only correct way.
  • madamepsychosis
    madamepsychosis Posts: 472 Member
    I think giving someone advice is fine, but it really pisses me off when people act like their advice is not advice but the gospel truth and tell people they're DOING IT WRONG when they're eating healthily and losing weight.
  • danapellerin
    danapellerin Posts: 34 Member
    My reply would be "Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it". And then If I felt it didn't apply to me, I'd ignore it. Don't let other people cause you undue stress.
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
    OP you have a point, but if someone asks for advice in a post, I see nothing wrong with someone giving their experience if they have had the same problem. There are always multiple "experiences" for the OP to look at and consider, then take whatever action they will take. If I choose to relate my experience to someone, I usually preface it with "for me.." or ":in my experience.." Also, people need to use some common sense when listening to "experts" or to anyone else offering advice.

    I too have a problem with so called experts stating what appears to be facts when they have not been proven or like you said pulled from google or from somewhere "where the sun don't shine". I have seen some advice on posts that makes me cringe and to hope the OP doesn't get hurt by it.
  • junyr
    junyr Posts: 416 Member
    It's not the person trying to help that's the fool, it's the person blindly following that advice without researching it themselves.

    This applies not only to fitness, but also to the other taboos such as politics and religion.
  • Amzly
    Amzly Posts: 4
    It sounds to me like your friend is trying to validate his own way of doing by gaining approval from other people. In assuming your ignorance, he is making himself feel better about what he feels is a good diet..... It will be kind of awkward when what you're doing actually works and he ends us eating 3 meals through one drink. :ohwell:
  • PositivelyFlawed
    PositivelyFlawed Posts: 316 Member
    I think the only advice we CAN or SHOULD give is from our own experiences, but we don't have to ram it down someones throat. I always respond to posts when I have something to add. It's merely my opinion on what works for me. If you take a little of everyone elses advice, do a little of your own research and listen to your body, i think you come out on top, but that's just what works for ME!
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,944 Member
    If someone asks me "So, how did you lose the weight?" or "How have you kept the weight off for 18 months?" - I have no problem telling them what worked for ME. I won't tell them it'll work for them or that it is the ONLY way to lose weight and keep it off. I make sure they know that just because something worked for me, doesn't mean it'll work for them. On the other hand, if it weren't for other people, Google, articles, etc I might have given up when I was stuck for months at 167lbs. Had no one else been willing to say "This is what worked for me..." I wouldn't have figured out that I wasn't eating enough. Or how to check my BMR or TDEE.

    So, not all advice is "bad". Not everyone who offers up what has worked for them thinks they know it all about everyone - they simply know what works for them. I have no issue telling someone to figure out their OWN body - they'll be happy they did.


    I see a lot of posts here with people offering up what has worked for them. I'll read them because you never know when you might stumble onto something that works even better for you!
  • Debbe2
    Debbe2 Posts: 2,071 Member
    Completely understand where you're coming from and agree. A lot of us have spent a lot of time listening and doing things that worked for someone else. I think I finally understand that what works for you may not work for me or for friend x for that matter. This is your journey, your body, your life and your goals. Stay smart, strong, open minded and make your decisions accordingly towards health and wellness as the goal. :wink:
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,741 Member
    i can actually beat that - a 'friend' (guy i used to go to school with) of mine on facebook put a status saying he was trying to lose 31lbs in 29days for a stag do, and had lost 7lbs in the first day....

    i put a comment along the lines of 'sorry to tell you that you cant lose that amount of weight healthily and keep it off' and got loads of abuse!

    a bit further down the post, after someone else told him it was impossible to lose 7lbs is a day, he revealed his 'secret' - he is doing atkins, and in one day all he ate was 2 bits of meat and a slice of cheese, worked all day and then played football for an hour, hence the 7lbs 'loss'...

    i dispair!!!
  • giantsfaninvt
    giantsfaninvt Posts: 26 Member
    I don't mind when someone offers advice or talks about what has worked for them, but when they imply that their way is the ONLY way it should be done then I really can't take them seriously. Anyone who is even a little bit informed knows that there are more ways to accomplish fitness and weight loss than can be counted.
  • Sageyoku
    Sageyoku Posts: 71 Member
    Still think this site needs either a rep system or the ability to down-rank bad/stupid/wrong advice into oblivion. There are too few who know what's going on and too many that offer bad advice. It's hard to cut through the bad advice and get the good advice.

    Unfortunately, there are so many sources of bad info out on the internet and real life and people are gullible.

    Yeah, this is totally what I'm getting at. It bothers me that people with different goals and no health background other than what works for them give advice as a DEFINITE, i.e. "you MUST do 'x' if you EVER want to lose weight", "you NEED to cut/add 'x' to/from your diet", "you HAVE to exercise 'x' way if you want 'y' results", and on and on. I know it's all opinion, but some people really DO take it seriously.

    Advice is great, don't get me wrong. I love to know what my friends and people on mfp think about various subjects, and how their goals were achieved using various methods. It's really interesting! But it just worries me, I guess, when for example my friend trying to lose weight is seriously taking advice from someone trying to gain it. I can't say anything because I don't have a health background either, but...it just makes me worry, that's all :/
  • Sageyoku
    Sageyoku Posts: 71 Member
    I don't mind when someone offers advice or talks about what has worked for them, but when they imply that their way is the ONLY way it should be done then I really can't take them seriously. Anyone who is even a little bit informed knows that there are more ways to accomplish fitness and weight loss than can be counted.

    this.
  • ....just because someone gives us advice doesn't mean we need to follow it.
    The whole thing is about getting different opinons and finding what works best for YOU.

    Plus, with men they always try to 'fix' things when giving advice when sometimes us women just want to complain...lol I am sure he was just trying to help in his own way.


    ^^^^^THIS!:drinker:
  • Sageyoku
    Sageyoku Posts: 71 Member
    Completely understand where you're coming from and agree. A lot of us have spent a lot of time listening and doing things that worked for someone else. I think I finally understand that what works for you may not work for me or for friend x for that matter. This is your journey, your body, your life and your goals. Stay smart, strong, open minded and make your decisions accordingly towards health and wellness as the goal. :wink:

    THIS! :heart:
  • Misiaxcore
    Misiaxcore Posts: 659 Member
    Well, it's fair to be like, "I heard ___" or "for me, ___ works" or "from what I've read and understand, ___ is a good approach" etc.

    I think it's important to hear all advice. You just have to decide how informed it is by doing a little homework. :)

    ^
  • Sageyoku
    Sageyoku Posts: 71 Member
    ....just because someone gives us advice doesn't mean we need to follow it.
    The whole thing is about getting different opinons and finding what works best for YOU.

    Plus, with men they always try to 'fix' things when giving advice when sometimes us women just want to complain...lol I am sure he was just trying to help in his own way.


    ^^^^^THIS!:drinker:

    Agree!
    Yeah, he was trying to be all sweet and helpful :) I'm over it, it was just a moment of frustration. Thanks for letting me rant mfp :flowerforyou:
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,813 Member
    There's nothing wrong with offering advice. The problem, IMO, is a person who, instead of offering advice, insists that their way is the only correct way.

    irony?
  • Sageyoku
    Sageyoku Posts: 71 Member
    If someone asks me "So, how did you lose the weight?" or "How have you kept the weight off for 18 months?" - I have no problem telling them what worked for ME. I won't tell them it'll work for them or that it is the ONLY way to lose weight and keep it off. I make sure they know that just because something worked for me, doesn't mean it'll work for them. On the other hand, if it weren't for other people, Google, articles, etc I might have given up when I was stuck for months at 167lbs. Had no one else been willing to say "This is what worked for me..." I wouldn't have figured out that I wasn't eating enough. Or how to check my BMR or TDEE.

    So, not all advice is "bad". Not everyone who offers up what has worked for them thinks they know it all about everyone - they simply know what works for them. I have no issue telling someone to figure out their OWN body - they'll be happy they did.


    I see a lot of posts here with people offering up what has worked for them. I'll read them because you never know when you might stumble onto something that works even better for you!

    Completely agree. If it hadn't been for mfpers giving me advice on my food diary, I might never have realized that I wasn't eating NEAR enough protein!
    I ranted because I was worried about my friend, and because he phrased his advice to me as a 'you must do this', which made me frustrated. Thank you for listening :)
  • elsinora
    elsinora Posts: 398 Member
    I think giving someone advice is fine, but it really pisses me off when people act like their advice is not advice but the gospel truth and tell people they're DOING IT WRONG when they're eating healthily and losing weight.

    ^^ ThIS! There are some people on here that I have found that they almost sport for a fight, so gladly love to read the different pieces of advice or stories etc but will not take anything as law!