Why Would You Keep Your Food Diary Private?

Gargwin82
Gargwin82 Posts: 152 Member
edited November 11 in Motivation and Support
Hi hi;

When I first joined MFP I kept my food/exercise diary private. One of my friends advised me that by making it open people would be able to give more constructive compliments and advice. It's true! I never reazlized how few vegetables I ate until every time I added one people were patting me on the back for getting them in. Same with other friends who have open diaries, it's neat seeing different meal ideas, exercise programs, ect. When people "go over" their calories it's easy to look and see if it's something minor like they had an apple and reassure them it isn't the end of the world. The other hand if friends aren't eating nearly enough calories you can drop a bug in their ears trying to find out why they have suddenly dropped off the ammount they're eating. Most times it simply comes down to illness.

I know it's scary having people viewing your habits. Fearing that you're going to be judged is hard to cope with. However after opening my diary up I can say it has been a huge help. It is nice to know friends are actually paying attention to what you're doing and not just typing, "Good Job" everytime (In no way am I saying a Good Job is a bad thing, I appreciate those very much as well :D ) I feel guilty I'm not able to give more imput than a Good Job to my friends with private diaries, that I'm not able to share greater in their success and possibly learn from their changing habits.

ANYWAYS that's all I really wanted to say. I can understand completely that some people just don't want to share that much information about themselves. However in the end I would like to believe nobody is on hear to judge or put down others :flowerforyou:
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Replies

  • OnMyWeigh464
    OnMyWeigh464 Posts: 447 Member
    I was worried at first about being judged but then decided the only way to get help is by opening up...and showing my food diary is just one way of doing so...do I REALLYA wanna eat that whole cheesecake and face the music??? LOL

    I'm slowly learning that some constructive criticism isn't always a bad thing.
  • I definitely get the benefits to sharing my food diary... but I'm scared! I feel like that's something I'm working my way up to, and will probably open it up to the public within the next couple weeks. Just got to get that confidence up and really get used to this lifestyle change! Never been so open with my eating/dieting habits before. It's a lot to get used to!
  • Cold_Steel
    Cold_Steel Posts: 897 Member
    I get more wtf how are you eating that and losing weight comments about it...

    I don't care

    Because it is working
  • Cold_Steel
    Cold_Steel Posts: 897 Member
    I definitely get the benefits to sharing my food diary... but I'm scared! I feel like that's something I'm working my way up to, and will probably open it up to the public within the next couple weeks. Just got to get that confidence up and really get used to this lifestyle change! Never been so open with my eating/dieting habits before. It's a lot to get used to!

    I see where you are coming from. For me, I had a eating problem. I would after work go and buy a meal at a fast food joint, park away from people and scarf it down. Putting my diary as private too me is doing that, hiding. People you care about know what you eat on a daily basis why should a bunch of anonymous internet turds be a worry to you ?
  • xmandadollx
    xmandadollx Posts: 69 Member
    Mine is open, but I am seriously thinking about closing it. I can't have a large lunch and a small dinner without having people tell me I need to eat more dinner. Can't you have a late lunch and eat more and then have a smaller dinner before bed? If I am late for work and miss breakfast, I hear about it. Then, I feel the need to explain why I ate the meals I ate and when and I feel I have to defend my choices. To me, it is becoming a lot of negative energy. I need positive energy right now.
  • Laner07
    Laner07 Posts: 100 Member
    I find knowing that other people can see what I eat motivates me to make better choices. . . . most of the time anyway.
  • bander21
    bander21 Posts: 40 Member
    I totally agree. We all need help sometimes, and a little constructive criticism never hurts! I wasn't eating enough calories. Now I am on track and feeling great!
  • Fat2FitChick
    Fat2FitChick Posts: 451 Member
    Although my diary is open and has been for quite some time, people here tend to use it to criticize others even if it is not wanted. If I ask for help then please feel free to check it out and tell me what may be wrong, but if I don't and I am still losing weight just fine, then don't say anything about my eating fast food for lunch and dinner.

    That is why many don't want to open their diaries. Not all do it though, I have an awesome group of supporters and love them dearly but I have seen a few posts on here like "What do I do about one of my MFP friends, all she eats is McDonalds all the time".

    Open diaries are not an invitation to criticize my eating habits when you want. If I ask then sure, but if I don't then please don't!
  • I definitely get the benefits to sharing my food diary... but I'm scared! I feel like that's something I'm working my way up to, and will probably open it up to the public within the next couple weeks. Just got to get that confidence up and really get used to this lifestyle change! Never been so open with my eating/dieting habits before. It's a lot to get used to!

    To joconnor09
    I see on your profile that you joined this site because it seemed like a really easy way for you to keep track of what you eat and what you do- and that the calorie counter is a really good guilt-tripping tool. Your friends can be of incredible assistance too, if you let them. We are all in this journey together, No one is here to be judgemental over what you eat, but an occasional swift kick in the pants can make a huge difference in keeping you pointed towards the goal line! Sharing your diary with your friends can be a great way to gain the help that we all need!
  • I keep my diary private because I don't take critism well, I am hard enough on myself and feel like *kitten* when I know I just had something that I shouldn't have and I really don't want ppl tellin me "Hey you know you shouldn't eat that, this has to be a lifestyle change" Trust me I know that. It was open at the start and ppl would tell me things like that and I start feeling like crap about it and what they were saying so I closed it. It wasn't worth having it open to me. I am one of those ppl that can't cut everything I like out or I will fail so yeah once a week I have a "cheat meal" I got tired of ppl jumpin on me about what I had that night for dinner. But like I said I don't take critism well :wink:
  • IsMollyReallyHungry
    IsMollyReallyHungry Posts: 15,385 Member
    I too recently opened up my diary to my friends' and it has really helped me too. I try to read a few diaries now also for ideas but my time is short so I can't review that many diaries. I must admit when I binge I don't feed to my news feed all the times or I don't complete it but it still keeps me mindful that I do have it public and even if I know something already it does not hurt for me to be reminded of it again.
  • Therdigh
    Therdigh Posts: 28 Member
    I find knowing that other people can see what I eat motivates me to make better choices. . . . most of the time anyway.
    I feel the same way.
  • IsMollyReallyHungry
    IsMollyReallyHungry Posts: 15,385 Member
    I find knowing that other people can see what I eat motivates me to make better choices. . . . most of the time anyway.

    I agree with this statement also
  • leafstucker16
    leafstucker16 Posts: 136 Member
    I've opened up mine as well, figure if im trying to change how I eat them some good tips wouldn't hurt :)
  • IsMollyReallyHungry
    IsMollyReallyHungry Posts: 15,385 Member
    Although my diary is open and has been for quite some time, people here tend to use it to criticize others even if it is not wanted. If I ask for help then please feel free to check it out and tell me what may be wrong, but if I don't and I am still losing weight just fine, then don't say anything about my eating fast food for lunch and dinner.

    That is why many don't want to open their diaries. Not all do it though, I have an awesome group of supporters and love them dearly but I have seen a few posts on here like "What do I do about one of my MFP friends, all she eats is McDonalds all the time".

    Open diaries are not an invitation to criticize my eating habits when you want. If I ask then sure, but if I don't then please don't!

    I agree with this one also because we all know how we got here and we do know bad and good choices and we are going to eat what we really want some days.
  • mfoy94
    mfoy94 Posts: 228 Member
    I had assumed they were public until today when a friend said she would like to see all of her friends diaries. I changed mine, its great motivation. That way I know if I slip up I will be held accountable (somewhat) by my motivators.
  • I keep my diary private because i'm not interested in anyone's comments on what I'm eating. That's the short, straightforward answer.

    To expand a bit on that...

    If I was eating the way I think I should and still not losing weight I would consider making my diary public in order to get advice. I just don't want unsolicited commentary on my food choices. I want approval from *me* before I get approval from anyone else.

    I understand that when people make their diaries public it doesn't necessarily mean they're looking for approval; that's just the way I feel when I talk to people about food. Then I feel like I'm giving them some power over me-- regardless of whether that line of thinking makes sense to anyone else, that's where my mind goes with it!

    I got fat because I looked to other people to see if I was worthy or not. I always fell short and then overate to mask my feelings of sadness and loneliness. I feel that in order to get over that issue I need to be fierce about making sure I don't open myself up to wanting validation from others in this arena. Additionally, I have some serious shame problems about food and eating, and I can see how allowing people to make unsolicited comments on my food choices-- good or ill-- could activate some of that stuff.

    Not that I wouldn't want congratulations-- of course we all deserve and need pats on the back and encouragement regularly! But for where I am right now it's just better for me and my success if I keep it private.
  • felcandy
    felcandy Posts: 228 Member
    i feel guilty :P
  • foremant86
    foremant86 Posts: 1,115 Member
    Mine has been completely public every sense i joined.

    I like when others have theirs open as well so I can get new ideas for snacks and meals.

    I also won't comment on a friend's diary if it's private because for all i know they are eating 600 calories a day and I don't want to encourage that.
  • reese66
    reese66 Posts: 2,920 Member
    I definitely get the benefits to sharing my food diary... but I'm scared! I feel like that's something I'm working my way up to, and will probably open it up to the public within the next couple weeks. Just got to get that confidence up and really get used to this lifestyle change! Never been so open with my eating/dieting habits before. It's a lot to get used to!

    To joconnor09
    I see on your profile that you joined this site because it seemed like a really easy way for you to keep track of what you eat and what you do- and that the calorie counter is a really good guilt-tripping tool. Your friends can be of incredible assistance too, if you let them. We are all in this journey together, No one is here to be judgemental over what you eat, but an occasional swift kick in the pants can make a huge difference in keeping you pointed towards the goal line! Sharing your diary with your friends can be a great way to gain the help that we all need!

    Actually there are some people are judgmental about others diaries. People have been known to call people out by name on the forums for possible having eating disorder. People will make rude comments if you ate fast food, if you didn't eat clean or if you ate meat. I am not saying everyone does it, just some people think the only way to do this is to do it their way and have no problem being down right rude about.

    I don't need my diary open for accountability, I can lie or overeat if it's open or closed. I view other diaries for food ideas, hence mine is open to friends for the same purpose.
  • wbgolden
    wbgolden Posts: 2,066 Member
    I don't want people to know I'm really a zombie and only eat braaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnssss.
  • reese66
    reese66 Posts: 2,920 Member
    I don't want people to know I'm really a zombie and only eat braaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnssss.

    You brain eater...
  • econut2000
    econut2000 Posts: 395 Member
    There is a lot I will share in this world, my food choices are not one of those things. You open yourself up to too much criticism. I do what works best for ME and that isn't what necessarily works for other people. I eat mainly a flexitarian whole foods diet. So, right there you get criticism because "not eating meat isn't good for you" or "you're eating too much meat". Or that bag of chips I broke down and bought the other day and ate the whole thing because I was having a bad day, was logged into my diary because I won't lie to myself. Knowing I won't lie to myself, I don't need to be accountable to anyone else. If someone needs that extra push to keep them accountable then more power to them, but I don't need or want it. Honestly it would probably encourage me to lie in my diary so I didn't get criticized for that whole bag of chips, but what good would that be?
  • DL121004
    DL121004 Posts: 214 Member
    Horror of horrors, but not everyone uses the logging feature. :smile:
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
    I don't want people to know I'm really a zombie and only eat braaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnssss.

    With fava beans and a nice chianti...
  • jwpe
    jwpe Posts: 77 Member
    I am fairly new to the site.....how do you put your diary private or public? I have no idea if mine is or isn't.
  • I am fairly new to the site.....how do you put your diary private or public? I have no idea if mine is or isn't.

    When you are on the home page click the Settings then click on the Diary link
  • Mine is private because I don't want the comments/criticisms. I know that some people do feel the need to be held accountable in order to meet their goals - I am not one of them. I come here every day and log what I ate and how much I worked out at the gym - mostly to learn how many calories is in that meal I just ate and to keep track of my progress. I am happy enough with my own progress and do not need to be held accountable in regard to what/how much I eat. I know when I screw up and I feel bad enough about it without having people point it out to me.
    Like econut2000 said: I do what works best for ME and that isn't what necessarily works for other people.
  • gillleeman
    gillleeman Posts: 397 Member
    I've had mine open, I've had it shut. Today it is again shut.

    I also have a history of eating disorders, I find when its open I'm not honest with my logging if I have a relapse. This isn't helping me, the road to recovery for me is honesty....... but only with people I feel safe with. When my diary is private I log the lot..... every single mouthful.

    There are far too many people on here who give 'advice'. Advice is to be given when asked for in my opinion.
  • HorrorChix89
    HorrorChix89 Posts: 1,229 Member
    I keep mine closed to avoid anyone not on my friends list. Tips are fine but I've learned in my short time here that people don't give tips, they try to change you. Not my thing
This discussion has been closed.