A Chinese doctor clears all misconceptions about food and di
: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two body, your ratio two to one.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain...good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad?
Q : Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? A: Oh no! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure? A: If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.
Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle? A: Hey! 'Round' is shape!
Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two body, your ratio two to one.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain...good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad?
Q : Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? A: Oh no! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure? A: If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.
Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle? A: Hey! 'Round' is shape!
Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
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Replies
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Hahaha
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That was great!! lol0
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I know this is in good fun, but it's a bit offensive.0
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And why is offensive....?0
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It was kind of mocking the stereotype.0
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Yep, it's a bit racist. The whole "Chinese = broken English, no articles, telegraphic speech" thing is pretty offensive.0
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And let me guess, no one here has EVER mocked the gutteral speech of a German, the southern twang of a hillbilly or a Mexican, Spaniard, Frenchman...the list is endless. C'mon people, find something a little more worthy to protest, like abuse, child porn, or homelessness. There ARE stereotypes for a reason. Doesn't mean we think less of the people. AND I don't think the OP was mocking the Chinese, I think the author of the joke felt it sounded funnier in broken English and happened to choose Chinese as opposed to French, German etc. Really....0
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LMAO! I thought that was funny, I really think people saying its racist is even funnier!0
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Its not offensive my father was irish and I hear irish jokes all the time the irish laugh along with them, Im blonde was naturally blonde I hear blonde jokes Im fat I hear fat jokes Its life?0
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