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Food Addiction

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It's an everyday struggle for me. I get better the farther I get into my lifestyle change. However, I can't have 'cheat days' like some of my friends have. Those days are just gateways to going back down the road to gain all of my weight back. So, I try to tell myself that those things are OK to eat, just don't overdo it. But, you know the feeling when you sink your teeth into your Achilles heel. That one food that you absolutely love. I can't just have one Reese's, I want the whole bag. No matter how sick it makes me feel. When I was younger, I was a closet eater, and I still struggle with that.

I also struggle with my OCD in my eating. For instance, once I see a cupcake at work, I think about that cupcake all day. And want to have it. Need to have it. And if I don't have it, I get very uncomfortable.

So, for the first couple months of my diet, I have to cut out things like that. And stay away from them. I don't go into the breakroom at work, because I know there are goodies that will make me gain my weight back. I cut out foods like pizza and certain sweets until I can get my ground again and know that I can have a cupcake, without feeling guilty or starving myself for the rest of the day.

I can say I've been getting better, 36lbs down and I ate a cupcake yesterday! :tongue: I didn't feel guilty, out of control or bad. I am in control and it feels great. Everything in moderation. Just one, not the whole container for me!

Anyone else have feelings like this? Have struggled with this?

Replies

  • jessieanned
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    Yes. I feel disgusting right now, actually.
    I went and saw a movie by myself tonight. Ate a whole bag of popcorn-- by myself. But, that wasn't enough. After the movies, I had to eat more, and stopped somewhere for a serving of cheese croquettes, swimming in oil.
    I start off healthy every day. My average breakfast may consist of fresh fruit, a serving of whole-wheat cereal with low-fat milk and a cup of coffee, no sugar. Lunch is healthy, too-- after that all bets are off. I start to crave junk food and the craving is serious. I can't stop thinking about it. I keep giving myself reasons not to stop for that pack of Oreo's... then I give myself reasons why it's okay. Then I feel disgusting and disappointed in myself after.

    Oh, the movie I saw by myself tonight?? Shame. Yeah, the one about addiction.
  • ama2414
    ama2414 Posts: 24
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    I have been feeling like this for most of my life. I feel nervous that I'm never going to have enough food. I just think that I'm never going to make it to my next meal or snack or whatever. Food is on my mind 24/7. I feel like it's a drug- if I don't get it, I start to get panicky. I wonder if they have any sort of treatments for this? I too start out relatively healthy, and then just go down hill. Please feel free add me- Maybe we can help each other out. Good luck everyone!

    Amanda
  • bb0322
    bb0322 Posts: 11
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    Hi everyone
    I completely agree! the Reese's - omg, cannot stop at 1... Reese's eggs are my favorite, and it's a constant struggle to not run to the store and buy some! (last year i bought like a box of them after the holidays and they were half off lol) It's a total addiction and OCD because once it's in my mind, I cant get it out, I think about it constantly and that distracts me from doing other things, and it wont stop until i give in! I sometimes will "try" portion control, but I always end up eating the whole thing and feel guilty.
    Why is there not more research done on this? I dont drink, smoke, do drugs, or anything else, but i am completely addicted to food!
    Last week I was good all week until Friday, when I lost control and went on a 3 day binge. i hate losing control and feeling so crappy. I've been good so far this week, but it's a constant struggle and I feel like have to pull myself back from the edge everytime, and I dont know how much longer I can keep this up, before giving in...
  • gildinha
    gildinha Posts: 57 Member
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    bumping so that I can answer later ...
  • gildinha
    gildinha Posts: 57 Member
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    Hey! Sorry it took me so long to come back and respond.
    I've been feeling the same for some long. I can be doing good for a few days and then I hit a wall and start eating like it's my last day on earth. I've tried everything, from drinking water (or tea) instead of eating, having a healthy snack or even going for a walk ... but there's nothing to do! A few weeks a go I started looking on the net and I find that ...

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Binge_eating_disorder

    I have some web sites that I have been reading about that but there all in french (french is my second language, english is my third ... that explains all the mistakes lol) ... if you do read french I can share them with you, if not you can do resaerch ... I'm not saying that any of you have the Binge eating disorder, I'm just saying that you might want to take a look at it ...
  • imworthit
    imworthit Posts: 165 Member
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    Your story is my story! I too have had to cut out certain foods because if I eat them, I eat a lot and then go for anything else I can find. Usually it starts with something sweet. Then I have to have something salty. Back to sweet, back to salty.......

    I am having to take take it day by day. "I can abstain from my trigger foods and I can eat healthy foods in healthy amounts, just for today." And then I say it again the next day and the next.
  • szymjk
    szymjk Posts: 5 Member
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    I'm sorry it's taken me so long to respond! I checked back and I never saw that anyone responded! Then Spring Break happened. And that was a struggle. But, I told myself I was going to use it to exercise and try to get some me time. Read a book. Play some sudoku. Swim. Do anything that took my mind off of when I was eating next. Even though my sister told me it was a vacation, and I shouldn't have to be good on it. I can't always think like that. Because, then the rest of my life will be a vacation, and I will eat whatever I want and be right back where I started.

    I am so glad so many of you responded. And glad I'm not the only one. Not that I would wish it upon anyone. It's so tough.
    I always feel like I have a to finish my plate. I can be sooo super full, and still have some food on my plate, it may not even be very good, but I HAVE to eat it. Funnier thing, I was never raised like that. No one in my family told me I had to clear my plate. Most of the time I COULD take it home for later. But I don't.

    And to agree with two of you... Reese's is my trigger food. I wanted to buy the box of Reese's eggs yesterday. And I thought about it ALL day. I ended up making myself leave without it. Because I couldn't just have one and save it for later. I would eat them til they were gone, I was sick to my stomach and regretting it. But at the time, I wouldn't be able to stop.

    And I can be REALLY good in the morning, but as the day progresses I get worse. After dinner cravings are HORRIBLE! Which is usually when I get in the most trouble with myself. I think, after dinner (which may be something salty or spicy) that I want something sweet to counteract it.

    And gildinha - I started learning French, however I am far from fluent. Lol. I do suffer from binge eating. And I know it sounds bad, but sometimes I wish that I could purge it all out. I would NEVER cause I hate the feeling of throwing up. But the thought does cross my mind. :frown: