How do I cope with this?

I know this is late, but I felt like I should go and respond to this.

You need to have a sit down with him and talk about why you want to lose weight and how he is sabatoging your progress. Before this talk, you have to write down a list of reasons why you want to lose weight (health, children, no diabetes, etc.) so he understands the total impact of the damage he could potentially cause with his fat filled meals. You say he is trying to gain weight, I would actually talk to him about maybe joining this site, there's actually a faction of people on here trying to gain weight. He might not think of this, but by trying to gain weight eating all these unhealthy meals, all he's going to gain is a nice sized gut. Unless he's doing research on the healthiest way to gain weight, he's just as at risk for heart disease as you are. There is such a thing as "skinny fat", maybe he should look it up.

You should also reassure him. Many men will hinder their girlfriends/wives weight loss because they're afraid once she gets thin and hot, she'll leave him for someone else. In my case, my ex fiancee years ago thought I was trying to lose weight because I was seeing someone behind his back (which wasn't true, I was doing it because I knew if I lost weight, my persistant heart burn would go away, but he refused to believe me. You can see why he's my ex.)

Finally, only you can control what you put in you mouth. He's not sitting there forcing you to eat his meals, is he? Does he have a gun to your head? Then you don't have to eat it. Find healthy alternatives for you for the peach cobbler, cake, etc. and don't eat the fat, fried food and sweets he puts in front of you. Start making dinner yourself. There are thousands of healthy recipes on the internet, and you can always browse though Amazon or Barnes and Noble for healthy cookbooks (you can find some GREAT deals on Amazon.)

I agree with the prior poster - skinny does not equal healthy! He is still at risk for t2 diabetes, heart disease, etc if he is eating poorly. Maybe set up a schedule where you cook alternating nights, or explore healthy new menus together. Look at it as an investment in the health of BOTH of you. Good luck!

Let me explain my situation. I am married with children...ages 20, 18 and 14. The 14 yr old has been gluten free because of celiacs. She gives up many things that we take for granted...and has to make substitutions. So, I say to myself...me being overweight is my problem...not my husbands, not my kids. If your husband is skinny...so be it. Remember, in my opinion...you are not his mother. He can eat what he wants...and you can eat what you want. Eating healthy is simple...when you think about it...fruits, veggies, grilled meats (which cook quickly) . Saying you are from the south is no excuse in my book...we all have them...my mom was German...oh so schnitzle and dumplings for me??? my husbands family is Italian...food is life...So, I think if you want to lose weight...do it...no matter what. If your hubby has bad food around..then make a choice. You either want weight loss bad enough, or you don't. I am not saying it will be easy, it ill be quick, but I am saying it is YOUR choice. I wish you luck and encouragement