Surprised at Society
foxyforce
Posts: 3,078 Member
I am still surprised (note: this does not apply to those that go under their cals and have acctually put in an effort to lose weight and are conscious of this...just don't want to offend anyone) at how much society relies on food and drinks.
Everything has to do with eating in the mainstream culture. I have such a hard time wrapping my head around this. I am one of those people that didn't weigh a lot as a child and grew up and got...fat. I got fat because I stopped playing and instead changed my social outings to drinks and dinner, going out for a coffee with the girls, girls nights with movies and ice cream/and whatever our fav junk food is at the time, grabbing a late bite of dim sum and drinks, going out just to drink, going to the club (and unable to not buy a drink or at least be pressured into it), eating and drinking with absolutely everything that I do socially whether it is going to the beach with a bag of chips with our picnic food, eating playing scattergories or monopoly, having snacks at work all day, having a snack on the train to and from work, going out to someones house and being bombarded with cheese and wine.
It is TOO much!!!!!! I am really trying to change, and I have severely limited what I am eating and I find some days I still go over even when I make healthy choices just because there are TOO many opportunities to eat.
I am happy I am now conscious of this, because overtime, the lbs will shrink away from staying away from food when I don't need to fuel my body.
Everything has to do with eating in the mainstream culture. I have such a hard time wrapping my head around this. I am one of those people that didn't weigh a lot as a child and grew up and got...fat. I got fat because I stopped playing and instead changed my social outings to drinks and dinner, going out for a coffee with the girls, girls nights with movies and ice cream/and whatever our fav junk food is at the time, grabbing a late bite of dim sum and drinks, going out just to drink, going to the club (and unable to not buy a drink or at least be pressured into it), eating and drinking with absolutely everything that I do socially whether it is going to the beach with a bag of chips with our picnic food, eating playing scattergories or monopoly, having snacks at work all day, having a snack on the train to and from work, going out to someones house and being bombarded with cheese and wine.
It is TOO much!!!!!! I am really trying to change, and I have severely limited what I am eating and I find some days I still go over even when I make healthy choices just because there are TOO many opportunities to eat.
I am happy I am now conscious of this, because overtime, the lbs will shrink away from staying away from food when I don't need to fuel my body.
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Replies
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There are many societies that center around friends and families gathering. There are all types of breads, desserts, and pastries. However, it is learning the portion sizes that is key. It is being able to identify the full sensation and understanding that just because food is there, it doesn't mean it has to be eaten. Its not easy, but its important that people don't give up their social activities just to lose weight.
Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Food Diary0 -
There are many societies that center around friends and families gathering. There are all types of breads, desserts, and pastries. However, it is learning the portion sizes that is key. It is being able to identify the full sensation and understanding that just because food is there, it doesn't mean it has to be eaten. Its not easy, but its important that people don't give up their social activities just to lose weight.
Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Food Diary
I'm not saying that whatsoever. I am however suggesting that instead of going out for a coffee, go out for a walk. Instead of going out for drinks, go to the movies. Do something else.
Society IS focused on eating.0 -
I've said that for a very long time. WE are food centric. Every social gathering whether it is happy (wedding) or sad (funeral) food is there to embrace us and to comfort us. That is the way it has always been and the way it will always be.
I think it's great that you've become aware of this and that you are doing things to change. I think you are going to be an inspiration to your friends if you suggest going for a walk instead of out for coffee or brunch. I think it would be great to go to the park and feed the birds instead of feeding our faces. I think it's great that you aren't going to STOP socializing because of this but are learning to deal with it.
I think I think a lot........:smokin:
Great post! :bigsmile:0 -
Well duh. Eating releases happy hormones. It's an activity that is easy to enjoy with a person. It can also be cheaper than many other activities (like the movies).
As well, food can easily be made into a sign of love. Mom with a plate of cookies, grandma's legendary tomato sauce. Think of those big Italian family Sunday lunches.
And remember, food was much more precious 200 years ago. People had to make sacrifices to have buttery rolls for Christmas breakfast.
We have not moved on from this mentality, even though food is way easier to prepare and buy.
Yet...I believe it is not the mentality itself so much as the actions. Those Italian Sunday lunches were not every day occurrences. Now, people might have a big Sunday brunch...and a daily white chocolate mocha. So they get fat. And people are less active.
Society has ALWAYS been hung up on food and things were pretty chill. Now our problem is too tasty food being too available, too cheap, and too PROCESSED. And we need to rediscover walking and taking time for ourselves. Not hammering away at a job computer and sneaking in some Facebook time.0 -
A few months ago my DH and I decided to cut back on spending. I personally decided that my friendships were based soley on food, and wanted to get away from this.
I told my friends I was no longer going out to breakfast, lunch, dinner, icecream, coffee or a damn pretzel at the beach! One girl disappeared...........I miss her:laugh:
My other friend joined my gym:noway: She went from 0-10 on the friend scale in 1 day. Imagine, you think you are going to really piss someone off by saying you can not go out with them to eat.............and instead they say YEAH!!! I dont want to either!!!
We mall walk, go to the beach, and workout at the gym. So much healthier and we are a lot closer.
Went to a nice dinner with her yesterday and then Whole Foods for flowers. We talked about good eating, books and bought some exercise stuff.
I think we can take some of this into our own hands. Invite a friend to come over for a walk in the neighborhood, or drive to a nice park and have fun. You are in control!!
:flowerforyou: Jeannie0 -
Well duh. Eating releases happy hormones. It's an activity that is easy to enjoy with a person. It can also be cheaper than many other activities (like the movies).
As well, food can easily be made into a sign of love. Mom with a plate of cookies, grandma's legendary tomato sauce. Think of those big Italian family Sunday lunches.
And remember, food was much more precious 200 years ago. People had to make sacrifices to have buttery rolls for Christmas breakfast.
We have not moved on from this mentality, even though food is way easier to prepare and buy.
Yet...I believe it is not the mentality itself so much as the actions. Those Italian Sunday lunches were not every day occurrences. Now, people might have a big Sunday brunch...and a daily white chocolate mocha. So they get fat. And people are less active.
Society has ALWAYS been hung up on food and things were pretty chill. Now our problem is too tasty food being too available, too cheap, and too PROCESSED. And we need to rediscover walking and taking time for ourselves. Not hammering away at a job computer and sneaking in some Facebook time.
HONEY!!! WHAT did you DO?? You look wonderful!!
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Well duh. Eating releases happy hormones. It's an activity that is easy to enjoy with a person. It can also be cheaper than many other activities (like the movies).
As well, food can easily be made into a sign of love. Mom with a plate of cookies, grandma's legendary tomato sauce. Think of those big Italian family Sunday lunches.
And remember, food was much more precious 200 years ago. People had to make sacrifices to have buttery rolls for Christmas breakfast.
We have not moved on from this mentality, even though food is way easier to prepare and buy.
Yet...I believe it is not the mentality itself so much as the actions. Those Italian Sunday lunches were not every day occurrences. Now, people might have a big Sunday brunch...and a daily white chocolate mocha. So they get fat. And people are less active.
Society has ALWAYS been hung up on food and things were pretty chill. Now our problem is too tasty food being too available, too cheap, and too PROCESSED. And we need to rediscover walking and taking time for ourselves. Not hammering away at a job computer and sneaking in some Facebook time.
society has always been hung up on food in the sense that it was a struggle to get it. so it is for a different reason these days.
i get the comfort thing, my bf brought me hotcakes from mcdonalds this morning because he knows how much i love them and he was trying to be romantic...thus i ate them.
but it isn't so much a 'duh' situation for everyone. when you are socialized that way, it is an implicit thing, meaning you can't really see what is going on, you just go with it. that is just my opinion though. but if it were so easy as that then what is the point in even seeking support on a website like this.0 -
i get the comfort thing, my bf brought me hotcakes from mcdonalds this morning because he knows how much i love them and he was trying to be romantic...thus i ate them.
but it isn't so much a 'duh' situation for everyone. when you are socialized that way, it is an implicit thing, meaning you can't really see what is going on, you just go with it. that is just my opinion though. but if it were so easy as that then what is the point in even seeking support on a website like this.
It's a "duh" situation in the same since that "to lose weight, eat healthy and exercise." The gap between knowing and doing is ginormous. For everyone.
I don't mean to sound like some enlightened one. I'm not. Going out for coffee with friends is one of my favorite activities. But I look forward to the friends more so than the coffee. And I get coffee, not a goopaccino.
But my favorite food-and-friend activity? Cooking together. It is an amazing way to grow closer to someone, when you simply make a meal together.
Why don't you cutely suggest to your boyfriend that you make breakfast together? You can make a delicious, healthy breakfast. Enjoy it together, laugh at each others knife ineptness, chat while the food's cooking. When you make food activities about more than the food, then food is a great way to "spice up" social interactions.
But you're absolutely right that we get too obsessed with food. I think we, as society, have to shift our focus back towards PEOPLE. Not computers, not food, not people who we only see through a glass box. It drives me nuts when people can recall every important event in Brad Pitt's life but can't remember their parents' anniversaries.Went to a nice dinner with her yesterday and then Whole Foods for flowers. We talked about good eating, books and bought some exercise stuff.
See? Perfect example of proper food-friend interaction!
Thank you! Haha, just clean eating and exercise.HONEY!!! WHAT did you DO?? You look wonderful!!0 -
My friends started to WII Fit (yes grown women). I would like to get DDR and do that also with my family (Yes Grown Folks lol). In the old days of the 70's and 80's there used to be food and dancing when friends and family got together now there is just food.0
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A few months ago my DH and I decided to cut back on spending. I personally decided that my friendships were based soley on food, and wanted to get away from this.
I told my friends I was no longer going out to breakfast, lunch, dinner, icecream, coffee or a damn pretzel at the beach! One girl disappeared...........I miss her:laugh:
My other friend joined my gym:noway: She went from 0-10 on the friend scale in 1 day. Imagine, you think you are going to really piss someone off by saying you can not go out with them to eat.............and instead they say YEAH!!! I dont want to either!!!
We mall walk, go to the beach, and workout at the gym. So much healthier and we are a lot closer.
Went to a nice dinner with her yesterday and then Whole Foods for flowers. We talked about good eating, books and bought some exercise stuff.
I think we can take some of this into our own hands. Invite a friend to come over for a walk in the neighborhood, or drive to a nice park and have fun. You are in control!!
:flowerforyou: Jeannie
Wow, what a great story Jeannie! That is awesome! It just goes to show you that you never know what will happen until you make the move. Good for you! :drinker:0 -
great. Another "food is evil" or "eating is evil" thread. Its not societies fault, atleast not society as a whole. Like its some big conspiracy or something. Its people who don't know their limits or put forth the effort to engage in moderation. Whether it comes to drinking, eating, or whatever vice one choses to destroy their health (life) with. Nobody is forcing a gun to your head or establishing laws to force you eat bad food. Somebody goes to a party and can't show a little moderation and eat a light meal...thats not the wedding planners fault, or the caterers fault. It comes down to what you know you should and shouldn't be eating. Or rather how much your eating, in most cases. If more people would take personal responsibility for their actions, maybe businesses and eating establishments (especially in America) would be more inclined to give the consumer what they want. Its seems that in the last few years, the health conscious people have stood up and said "hey we want healthy" or atleast make it look healthy.... and there is obviously alot more options available, besides a big fat greasy 1000 gal hamburger.
Or we can all just be lame, stay home and eat salad for the rest of our lives. There's a balance. You gotta have fun, but take care of your body. Its an attainable road to travel, we all just have to stick to it. And stop pointing fingers at society or other people, because we fall short. Maybe use more energy and point those fingers at ourselves instead of others.
Another point to think about is. Its not just mainstream cultures. Travel around the world. Even the most poorest of societies customs revolve around food. They invite you into their mud shack. Rangle up what little they have and offer it to you as a gift. Read your history. This has been the case since the beginning of time. Maybe thats what seperates us from the animals.0 -
im even more surprised that people don't know how to read.
i never once said eating is evil. or society is evil. i never once negated individuals responsibilities towards foods and exercise either.
i was speaking from a psychological sociological viewpoint and THOUGHT that it was worthwhile sharing here since i found this to be a place of solace and support... guess i was wrong!. but if you need to spew all that negativity, by all means, if it makes you feel better...go for it.0 -
im even more surprised that people don't know how to read.
i never once said eating is evil. or society is evil. i never once negated individuals responsibilities towards foods and exercise either.
i was speaking from a psychological sociological viewpoint and THOUGHT that it was worthwhile sharing here since i found this to be a place of solace and support... guess i was wrong!. but if you need to spew all that negativity, by all means, if it makes you feel better...go for it.0 -
It's a "duh" situation in the same since that "to lose weight, eat healthy and exercise." The gap between knowing and doing is ginormous. For everyone.
im talking about how easy it is to lose control, isn't always experienced as a duh situation0 -
i am so pissed off that i couldn't share something personal to me.0
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im even more surprised that people don't know how to read.
i never once said eating is evil. or society is evil. i never once negated individuals responsibilities towards foods and exercise either.
i was speaking from a psychological sociological viewpoint and THOUGHT that it was worthwhile sharing here since i found this to be a place of solace and support... guess i was wrong!. but if you need to spew all that negativity, by all means, if it makes you feel better...go for it.
Nah I get what your saying. But I think from a pyschological standpoint, we really give our mental state way to much credit. I think alot of what your talking about, maybe those changes we go thru from being a child to an adult (eating habits) are physiological. I do agree with the reply earlier, there are chemical elements involved in our brain; we get pleasure from eating. But it doesn't mean that has to control our very lives to the point of being overweight, unhealthy, etc etc etc. Our bodies and physical abilities are way underestimated. We are capable of so much. When it comes to exercise, strength, overcoming illness and even injuries. But we'd rather just sit on our *kitten*, eat crap, skip the gym, skip the hard work, go to the doctor office and down medications, and we wonder why our bodies are all screwed up.
This is in no way encouraging people not to go to the doctor or take medicine. Granted, your super ill or have a disease, you have to take care of it. I just think when it comes to small stuff.... we are quick to run toward the easy fix. Look at all those late-night commericals for diet pills. Its always that quick "pill" to fix your problems. Well, unfortunately, its not a fixer.
Again, I think the customs and social aspects of our society, is really a mute point. Because everyone has to eat. Its just what we identify with.
I hope that clears up my response earlier, cause I didn't want to come off sounding like an *kitten*.0 -
I think it's great that Loathsome had an "AH HA" moment.
However, we can't get bent out of shape when others have different opinions then ours, either way in this case. Some will agree and some won't.... Some will see it as motivation and some will see it as an excuse.
We are here with similar goals, but we all have different mentalities and see things differently.
We all don't have to agree on everything and we shouldn't be expected to.
:flowerforyou:
I come from one of THOSE families, where it's ALL about food every time we get together, and despite my goals... I hope that doesn't change... Out of a family of 8 with 4-5 excellent cooks... it's one of the RARE times we actually are all together to show off our skills AND get all the food ate.
I agree that sometimes food does become a focal point... for a plethora of reasons.
Trust me, this last year has shown me how "family get-togethers and indulgences" can hinder goals, but it's a lifestyle change not a prison sentence. I can eat to live... but there are times where it's darn good fun to live to eat (IF it can be controlled...which I am still working on)...Heck, the cake is the ONLY reason my brothers want me to get married!
:drinker:0 -
Nah I get what your saying. But I think from a pyschological standpoint, we really give our mental state way to much credit. I think alot of what your talking about, maybe those changes we go thru from being a child to an adult (eating habits) are physiological. I do agree with the reply earlier, there are chemical elements involved in our brain; we get pleasure from eating. But it doesn't mean that has to control our very lives to the point of being overweight, unhealthy, etc etc etc. Our bodies and physical abilities are way underestimated. We are capable of so much. When it comes to exercise, strength, overcoming illness and even injuries. But we'd rather just sit on our *kitten*, eat crap, skip the gym, skip the hard work, go to the doctor office and down medications, and we wonder why our bodies are all screwed up.
This is in no way encouraging people not to go to the doctor or take medicine. Granted, your super ill or have a disease, you have to take care of it. I just think when it comes to small stuff.... we are quick to run toward the easy fix. Look at all those late-night commericals for diet pills. Its always that quick "pill" to fix your problems. Well, unfortunately, its not a fixer.
Again, I think the customs and social aspects of our society, is really a mute point. Because everyone has to eat. Its just what we identify with.
I hope that clears up my response earlier, cause I didn't want to come off sounding like an *kitten*.
It sounds like you are saying that weight loss and health is more physiological than psychological or am I miss understanding your point?0 -
Nah I get what your saying. But I think from a pyschological standpoint, we really give our mental state way to much credit. I think alot of what your talking about, maybe those changes we go thru from being a child to an adult (eating habits) are physiological. I do agree with the reply earlier, there are chemical elements involved in our brain; we get pleasure from eating. But it doesn't mean that has to control our very lives to the point of being overweight, unhealthy, etc etc etc. Our bodies and physical abilities are way underestimated. We are capable of so much. When it comes to exercise, strength, overcoming illness and even injuries. But we'd rather just sit on our *kitten*, eat crap, skip the gym, skip the hard work, go to the doctor office and down medications, and we wonder why our bodies are all screwed up.
This is in no way encouraging people not to go to the doctor or take medicine. Granted, your super ill or have a disease, you have to take care of it. I just think when it comes to small stuff.... we are quick to run toward the easy fix. Look at all those late-night commericals for diet pills. Its always that quick "pill" to fix your problems. Well, unfortunately, its not a fixer.
Again, I think the customs and social aspects of our society, is really a mute point. Because everyone has to eat. Its just what we identify with.
I hope that clears up my response earlier, cause I didn't want to come off sounding like an *kitten*.
It sounds like you are saying that weight loss and health is more physiological than psychological or am I miss understanding your point?
exactly. my spelling is not so great and I have "large" fingers (don't want to say fat)0 -
Nah I get what your saying. But I think from a pyschological standpoint, we really give our mental state way to much credit. I think alot of what your talking about, maybe those changes we go thru from being a child to an adult (eating habits) are physiological. I do agree with the reply earlier, there are chemical elements involved in our brain; we get pleasure from eating. But it doesn't mean that has to control our very lives to the point of being overweight, unhealthy, etc etc etc. Our bodies and physical abilities are way underestimated. We are capable of so much. When it comes to exercise, strength, overcoming illness and even injuries. But we'd rather just sit on our *kitten*, eat crap, skip the gym, skip the hard work, go to the doctor office and down medications, and we wonder why our bodies are all screwed up.
This is in no way encouraging people not to go to the doctor or take medicine. Granted, your super ill or have a disease, you have to take care of it. I just think when it comes to small stuff.... we are quick to run toward the easy fix. Look at all those late-night commericals for diet pills. Its always that quick "pill" to fix your problems. Well, unfortunately, its not a fixer.
Again, I think the customs and social aspects of our society, is really a mute point. Because everyone has to eat. Its just what we identify with.
I hope that clears up my response earlier, cause I didn't want to come off sounding like an *kitten*.
It sounds like you are saying that weight loss and health is more physiological than psychological or am I miss understanding your point?
exactly. my spelling is not so great and I have "large" fingers (don't want to say fat)
They aren't fat... they're fluffy!
:laugh:0
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