What if you lose all of the weight?

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HaRLo24
HaRLo24 Posts: 17 Member
in Motivation and Support
I've only been on this site for a few days and have already had success and found a mind set I didn't know I possessed in terms of weight loss and health. But I found myself thinking today, "what if I lose all of the weight and I still fall short of my expectations?"
What if I have a lot of skin left over? What if my stretch marks don't go away? What if I'm not as cute as I hoped I would be when I'm thin? What if I have a weird body shape with a flat butt and love handles that wont go away?----what if the reality wont be as good as the fantasy in my head of what it will be like when I'm thin?

Does anyone else have these thoughts or is just me? And if anyone does have these though how do you keep them from sabotoging your weight loss?
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Replies

  • bizco
    bizco Posts: 1,949 Member
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    Never had those thoughts but can offer some advice so you can minimize your fears.

    To avoid loose skin, lose the weight slowly. Don't fall for "The Biggest Loser" syndrome. That's why MFP settings only allows a max loss of 2 lbs. per week. To avoid a weird shaped body (and loose skin), strength training is a must. Buy some weight lifting books (or check your local library), spend time on www.bodybuilding.com for good beginner programs. Educate yourself on fitness and nutrition.

    Wishing you the best of luck. You'll be as cute as you hoped, don't worry.
  • HaRLo24
    HaRLo24 Posts: 17 Member
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    Thank you :)
    I do think I was falling for the Biggest Loser syndrome and was all about losing the weight as quickly as possible. I think I'm going to re-evaluate some things and start eating some of my exercise calories back. I'm a former athlete and know my way around a gym pretty well, in fact exercising is the one thing I've never had a problem with.
    I feel like I'm learning so much and for once its sound advice and not gimmicky. I'm sure some trial and error will be in order. This isn't a diet its a way of life---and I've never tried to live a "healthy lifestyle" before.
    Thanks again!
  • ruby_red_rose
    ruby_red_rose Posts: 321 Member
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    Yes, I had all the questions you do as well. But then I started asking myself if I'd rather be huge with no stretch marks or healthy weight with some stretch marks and loose skin. For me, the answer was easy. Even if I have a few stretch marks here and there and some loose skin, I'd rather be a healthy weight than obese.

    Luckily, even after losing 52lbs, I do not have any stretch marks. I am taking it pretty slow though - I started this journey back in July 2011.
  • AllisonMarisa
    AllisonMarisa Posts: 74 Member
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    I sort of worry about that sort of stuff. I'm following a similar plan to what the other person mentioned, losing weight slowly (I'm actually only doing 1lb a week most of the time) I'm also combining in some strength exercise too (focusing on toning)

    I heard someone once talk about how even though they had lost almost all their weight in a year, it took them several years to lose it mentally. They still saw themselves as a "overweight" person and had a hard time "losing" some of the ways of thinking that went along with it. I definitely find that to be true.
  • TheYankeeBelle
    TheYankeeBelle Posts: 37
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    Although I have fallen into the trap of thinking like that, I've kept my sanity by reminding myself that I just want to be a "less fluffy" version of what I am now.

    I too used to be an athelete (competitive gymnast) and stuff like that....but I know that is unlikely to come back into my life! However, I have new goals to reach for in terms of fitness and come to accept, begrudgingly, flaws like loose skin and stretch marks. Unless I hit the lotto and get loads of plastic surgery, these things are with me for life and I might as well look at the bright side of things in life....like good health, not being on medication, being comfortable in an airplane seat, shopping for clothes in cute-girl stores...

    Hope this helps.
  • WishfulShrinking331
    WishfulShrinking331 Posts: 244 Member
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    I feel the same way, I've lost 22 pounds since my weight loss journey, some would say I'm thin, but I still feel like there is so much more to lose. I think that it will take time to stop having a distorted view of ourselves and I think that people who had to work to be thin will always struggle with body image
  • mrsmel55
    mrsmel55 Posts: 168
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    I am 55 and have battled this on and off all my life. I have talked myself out of losing weight for the same reasons you mentioned. I saw the skin looking saggy when I started to lose weight and I gave up. That was about 8 years ago. When I was first married about 25 years ago I went from 241 to 152 and I gained it all back plus. My husband is 60 and he had a heart attack on January 14. That was my wake up call. This time I am freaking determined to do this. I went to the doctor on January 16 and I weighed 271. Today I went and I weighed 252. (at home and with no clothes its 248.5) (I like my scale better) My husband was not as overweight as me but he did no exercise and he ate what I fed him. So I have decided I need to do this for me and him. You are young. Get a handle on this now and you will enjoy your life so much more. Trust me. I have had a happy life but I have always been self concusious. This site is helping me sooo much. It makes me accountable to myself and I want to make everyone proud too.You can do it!!!!
  • Chryssie198726
    Chryssie198726 Posts: 1
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    I have that Fantasy of once i'm thin i'll be the hotter one and i'll show them...but then reality hits me in my face that i still have not lost as much weight as my sisters or my friends. That it's a long hard road. but it will be worth it because than I can go around with my head held high knowing i did this for myself and i look freakin hot!
  • HaRLo24
    HaRLo24 Posts: 17 Member
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    I am 55 and have battled this on and off all my life. I have talked myself out of losing weight for the same reasons you mentioned. I saw the skin looking saggy when I started to lose weight and I gave up. That was about 8 years ago. When I was first married about 25 years ago I went from 241 to 152 and I gained it all back plus. My husband is 60 and he had a heart attack on January 14. That was my wake up call. This time I am freaking determined to do this. I went to the doctor on January 16 and I weighed 271. Today I went and I weighed 252. (at home and with no clothes its 248.5) (I like my scale better) My husband was not as overweight as me but he did no exercise and he ate what I fed him. So I have decided I need to do this for me and him. You are young. Get a handle on this now and you will enjoy your life so much more. Trust me. I have had a happy life but I have always been self concusious. This site is helping me sooo much. It makes me accountable to myself and I want to make everyone proud too.You can do it!!!!


    Thank you so much. This just put everything into perspective for me. I keep telling myself that I want this to be a holistic change and not to get caught up in the superficial stuff of what I'll look like in a bikini. I'll try to remind myself that my skin might be sagging, but my heart wont be working as hard. I know you'll make everyone proud, and thank you again :)
  • HaRLo24
    HaRLo24 Posts: 17 Member
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    I feel the same way, I've lost 22 pounds since my weight loss journey, some would say I'm thin, but I still feel like there is so much more to lose. I think that it will take time to stop having a distorted view of ourselves and I think that people who had to work to be thin will always struggle with body image

    I think you're onto something. The eating healthy and exercising wont be the biggest battle, it'll be reprogramming my brain!
  • MelissaGraham7
    MelissaGraham7 Posts: 405 Member
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    I have some excess skin that is disappearing, some stretch marks that are fading....it is a long process but if you lose slowly and are exercising and toning and strength training while you are at it, it keeps firm. But if you think losing weight is going to make you beautiful and solve all your problems in life, you need to reevaluate yourself. Weight loss is difficult to do and even harder to keep off permanently. But being fit and healthy and making lifestyle choices is so worth it and it becomes easier over the years.
  • chrissismone
    chrissismone Posts: 116 Member
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    Enjoy your journey and don't worry nor fret for in all due time things will work they way they will need to. I often think about lose skin but as long as you hit those weights hard not girly ones but actually progressively getting heavier weights you will blow your own mind.
  • leomentlines
    leomentlines Posts: 440 Member
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    Just focus on the positive aspects of losing weight and getting healthy. I will always have a ton of stretch marks across my body and some cellulite on my legs, but I can either pair them with a lumpy unshaped body that I'm not happy with, or a strong toned body I've worked hard for. When I look at it like that, the second choice is obvious.
  • bushidowoman
    bushidowoman Posts: 1,599 Member
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    Honestly, yes, I've had all those same thoughts before losing weight.
    And honestly, after losing 30lbs, there are some changes that I'm not thrilled with.
    But it's just looks. Everyone's looks are going to go away eventually. All of us will have wrinkled skin and saggy boobs, no matter how much surgery we can afford--it's inevitable! I'm trying to focus on the way I feel instead. I feel strong and energetic, and that is more important than how I look.
    I see folks in their 70s and 80s who can still dance and yoga and swim and lift weights...and that is who I want to be someday.
  • megsmom2
    megsmom2 Posts: 2,362 Member
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    no one ever promised you that all of a sudden everything would be perfect if you lost weight...that you'd have a perfect round butt or nice perky boobs or world peace or the ability to fly. What you get is the best body you can have at that point in time, if you work at it, and probably better health to boot. Sounds pretty good to me.
  • heybales
    heybales Posts: 18,842 Member
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    Thank you :)
    I do think I was falling for the Biggest Loser syndrome and was all about losing the weight as quickly as possible. I think I'm going to re-evaluate some things and start eating some of my exercise calories back. I'm a former athlete and know my way around a gym pretty well, in fact exercising is the one thing I've never had a problem with.
    I feel like I'm learning so much and for once its sound advice and not gimmicky. I'm sure some trial and error will be in order. This isn't a diet its a way of life---and I've never tried to live a "healthy lifestyle" before.
    Thanks again!

    Excellent thinking, and even better, learning.

    Forget the 1360 MFP suggested when you told it 2lbs a week.

    Go for the 1860 when you select 1lb a week.

    Closer to your BMR 1970, so you won't be slowing your metabolism down too much. And just increase your daily non-exercise activity as much as possible at first.
  • aquasw16
    aquasw16 Posts: 342 Member
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    Regardless, you will be healthy. And, most of that is "fixable" anyway
  • SmashleeWpg
    SmashleeWpg Posts: 566 Member
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    Everyone has had great suggestions! Just try to remind yourself, it's about overall physical health and how you feel, not to mention the great sense of accomplishment you will have when you reach your goal; any marks you have are battle scars! :)

    In regards to stretch marks, I can tell you that they do fade overtime, but unfortunately many studies and research have shown that it's difficult to make them completely dissappear. I know that for me, Bio-Oil has been really helpful in minimizing them, as well as a little bit of self-tanner. And when I get frustrated with them, I refer to this:

    untitled2.jpg


    :)
  • PennyNickel14
    PennyNickel14 Posts: 749 Member
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    I've only been on this site for a few days and have already had success and found a mind set I didn't know I possessed in terms of weight loss and health. But I found myself thinking today, "what if I lose all of the weight and I still fall short of my expectations?"
    What if I have a lot of skin left over? What if my stretch marks don't go away? What if I'm not as cute as I hoped I would be when I'm thin? What if I have a weird body shape with a flat butt and love handles that wont go away?----what if the reality wont be as good as the fantasy in my head of what it will be like when I'm thin?

    Does anyone else have these thoughts or is just me? And if anyone does have these though how do you keep them from sabotoging your weight loss?

    I have these thoughts. It's a work in progress. The mind game of a lifestyle change is as hard as the physical game.

    It's okay to have moments of doubt. Keep pushing though :)
  • HaRLo24
    HaRLo24 Posts: 17 Member
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    Haha I'm sitting here giggling at some of your guys' replies. Well I wasn't necessarily hoping for the ability to fly, but world peace and perky boobs sound pretty good :) I think I just had a moment this morning where my self sabotage mode kicked in. I was having success and it was a new experience for me, I started looking for the negative. After reading everyone's words of encouragement and redirection to what really matters my head is clearer and I'm definitely more aware of some of my mental habits that aren't food or diet related, but need equal attention. Thank you all for your input, I really appreciate it!

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