"You need to stop losing weight" ... URGH!!!!!!!!!

I have the EXACT same sentiment. I ranted about it in my blog today actually. AAAAH it drives me crazy. I am well aware of my healthy range, and I am not going to go below that. I think it stems from 1) ignorance about anorexia 2) bad complements 3) jealousy.

I think I am going to start asking people what they mean when they say that and respond accordingly:

1) I am not in danger of losing too much weight because I am very concious about my body and I want to be HEALTHY and strong, but thanks for your concern. I am actually not close to being below my healthy weight range for my height, so no need to fear! Anorexia is frequently not about food anyway, it is about control, and alot of this whole thing to me is about eating healthy food and not junk.

2) Thank you for saying that I look good where I am at. I just want to look better!! And if you don't like skinny (healthy) girls then I'm sorry, it is none of your business, just like it's not your business how I do my hair or what clothes I buy.

3) It would probably be hard to tell their ulterior motives on this one. But If they are just being jealous/lazy/embarrassed that they aren't losing weight too then SCREW THEM for trying to bring me down.

But anyway, keep up the good work! And if people want to bring you down, ignore them and find people who will support you, like us!! Yay for taking care of yourself!!

Well, I've had the "you're wasting away" comment. However, this is from someone who's sister used to be anorexic. So, a lot of it comes from where they are coming from. Jealousy, concern, worry. As someone said, if they're used to you always being a heavier weight, you'll seem to be wasting away when really you're just getting down to a healthier weight. Good luck!

You have made amazing progress be proud of that and love yourself. Keep up the hard work, be strong, you are improving yourself for the better. If there were serious health concerns and she told you to stop that is a completely different story. You're an inspiration to others.

Sounds like cut and dry jealousy to me. They don't want you to shine as you truly should be allowed to shine. Ignore them and keep on working... You're doing an amazing job and you should be very proud.

:flowerforyou: You have done a great job...keep up the good work and get where you want to be!

I'm sure that if you had had your Doctor tell you to lose the weight you would have been able to refer her to your Doctor...get to the healthy range and have the happy dance you deserve it:drinker:

You are doing this for you NOT her:flowerforyou:

First of all: YAY for being overweight!! Congrats!! Over 100 pounds--You deserve to feel proud of yourself.

And trust me, I know the feeling
I often feel that my mom (unconsciously) tries to to sabotage me because she's overweight and unhappy with herself.
I think that's always behind of the negative comments--jealousy and/or insecurity.

Just remember you're a sensible person, and you're doing what's right for you and your happiness!

I just read your profile...since you did go to a Doctor...I'd just refer my Mom to him and let him deal with her

That is a beautiful rant! Remember 1 out of 5 adults are clinicly obese. They will all tell you that you need to stop or that your"too" skinny now and look sick.
We as a society are soo use to seeing over weight people, when we see people that are in the "healthy" range they are considered abnormal or too skinny.
Family above all should be supportive, do they not want you to live a long live? I dont know about any of you but i get sad when i see family and friends out of breath just bending over to tie thier shoe or climbing 10 steps.

I wish more people would see the life style change that we all make and praise us for the effort.

If you have just started or have been healthy for years good for you! it takes a very strong person to change their life! Don't ever forget that!

Congratulations on escaping the "obese" class! That's wonderful! Someday I hope to join you.

Whether they realize it or not, it sounds like those people are threatened by your positive changes. The more you improve yourself, the more they are reminded they need similar improvement. Change is scary, but that's no reason to undermine others. Stay strong and keep it up! Keep doing it for yourself.

its probably just jealousy

i have the same problem with my coworkers, when i was strict on my diet, theyd always be there with cake or desserts telling me "oh you can have just one its okay!", then when i'd faulter theyd be the first to say "oh so the diet is over?" theres just no pleasing some people, and the best part is you dont have to! please yourself dahlin!

and for that one chick, yes ranting is just fine! its nice to know youre in the same boat as others sometimes!

Try your best to ignore it. Jealous, yes...but they're also not used to seeing you this way. You're doing great! Keep up the good work!

THe ones closest to you are usually the ones that hurt you so much. Just advise them you appreciate their concern but you have a medically safe goal in mind and that is what you are working towards. I think when it comes to our children it's not JEALOUSY. It's shear concern. I am smaller than my 20 yr old now and I am 50. She tells me I am good where I am at, only because she is seeing collar bone hip bone and such showing on me for the first time in her life and mine. It's love, concern and I thinks that's it.. Do what you gotta do to be happy with the person you are becoming and eventually become..Great job btw...

I think you are doing great to have lost as much as you have already! And definitely keep going until YOU are happy with your weight loss. You aren't doing it for them, you are doing it for you.

I get the same things from people. I lost around 60 pounds to get to where I am at now, but I have changed my goals. I am not looking to just "lose weight" anymore, right now my goals are much more specific. I personally want to lower my body fat percentage to around 16% which is the highest level of body fat for most female athletes. That's just want I want to do. And everyone's going on and on about how "sickly" I will look if I lose more weight and crap like that. I showed a picture of Jamie Eason (female bodybuilder who looks fabulous to me) to my mom and told her that I wanted to get down to about her level of body fat, and she was like "but she looks so skinny and gaunt and you will look anorexic!" I wanted to scream at her, but I tried to keep my cool. That woman eats more than I do!!! Just because my goal is a size 2 doesn't mean I want to be unhealthy. I am pretty short, and I have loads of muscle. I eat 1400 or more calories a day. I am certainly not unhealthy.

But I do just chalk it up to jealousy. Maybe if they were working towards a goal, they'd be more supportive. But some people seem to think they know what's best for others, and that best must be exactly what they have. Cause if anyone else surpasses their own level of fitness, then they *must* be unhealthy. Whatevs...

People always are giving me 'free' advise.
I am morbidly obese and when I started telling my friends that I was starting a medical weight loss program, the advise came flying. Most of them meant well. But most of their advice was wrong!

They either have to be suffering from a savoir complex, jealousy, or arrogance. Don't know, don't care. I just nod and ignore them.

Sorry it's you Mother doing it though. When my Parents were alive, and I started my first weight loss program, I felt they were trying to sabotage me. In my case, it was the only way they know to communicate.