Why r folks so afraid of healthy debate?

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  • Pravnicka
    Pravnicka Posts: 1 Member
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    It is a fact that the Boy Scouts are homophobic.
    Fact: an actual or alleged event or circumstance, as distinguished from its legal effect or consequence.
    Opinion: a judgment or estimate of a person or thing with respect to character, merit, etc.
    Therefore, possibly you meant to state that in your opinion the Boy Scouts are homophobic?
    Possibly what is causing you a problem with people is forming an opinion and reporting it as fact?
  • DavetheHYNIC
    DavetheHYNIC Posts: 318 Member
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    Fear, lack of of individual thought and devoid of intellectual ability.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
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    Because people don't want to have their widdle feewings hurt?

    No sympathy... but then the biggest thing that I get offended about are people who are easily offended... seriously.
  • liftingbro
    liftingbro Posts: 2,029 Member
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    I didn't call your family homophobic. It is well documented that the ORGANIZATION of the Boy Scouts is

    So you don't think calling an organization that someone belongs to homophobic isn't the same thing as calling their members homophobic? The logic does not compute to me.
  • Erinslove
    Erinslove Posts: 139
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    Why are people so afraid of healthy debate?

    It is possible to debate issues without resorting to nasty personal attacks on the poster. When something really strikes me I will often share my disagreement. Sometimes with humor, sometimes with sarcasm, sometimes gently. Often, I get angry responses and I have had people then call me ugly (I now don't have a personal picture), read my bio and make fun of me for it (I no longer have a bio) and continue to attack me personally. I think it shows a lack of intelligence. Quote me all you want and disagree vehemently with the content of my ideas if you wish. It makes for interesting dialogue. However, getting irate indicates you have personal issues and character assasination is not only unproductive but also mean.

    I also get amused by the scads of people who tell me I am angry because I have posted that I disagree with something. No matter how often you tell me I am angry and miserable (and all the silly things I have had said) doesn't make it true. If you are angry own it but quit accusing me. I am actually able to function in this world simultaneously holding and fighting for an array of very strong ethics, morals, and beliefs AND remain calm and be ok with the knowledge that many people disagree with me. Being "ok" doesn't mean being silent. And silent I rarely am.

    I even read other people's arguments, think about them and *gasp* sometimes change my mind because I learn something. Other times, I keep my belief and I respond to discredit the argument or the idea - but not to verbally abuse the person with the idea.
    You could simply choose to ignore those that hurl personal insults at you. Healthy debate can still happen amidst name-calling and thread derailing. Stay on point, don't get ruffled, ignore the nonsense.

    Or, post a topic about your grievances in a very general way, alluding to previous posts and casting judgment on others' behavior.

    I've done both. At the end of the day, one feels better than the other.

    You are right! Great advice I shall follow in the future. One does feel better. Thanks for that!!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    post a topic about your grievances in a very general way, alluding to previous posts and casting judgment on others' behavior.

    ^ wasnt the one that should feel better, fyi
  • runningpfuhl
    runningpfuhl Posts: 11 Member
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    Don't go confusing things with logic now.... like organizations are allowed to have rules. ;) men don't work out at Lady of America or Curves. Women aren't allowed into mens only golf organizations.
    Might have something to do with your approach. When someone posted a "date my daughter application" as a joke you turned it into an attack on the boy scouts accusing them to be homophobic. That was meant to be a fun post not a debate. If other people are getting a laugh out of something that doesn't harm you, do you really need to be a party pooper and spoil that by creating a debate?

    Time and place is everything.

    Well 1st, be accurate. I was by far not the 1st to oppose the post. I was just the one people decided to focus on. And, I didn't turn it into anything. I shared information. It is a fact that the Boy Scouts are homophobic. And the fatal flaw of your argument is that "the post wasn't causing harm." I have studied for years about the ill effects that discrimination causes in our society and words and jokes perpetuate attitudes. Lastly, this post is not only referring to the date application post. This post is a response to several previous personal experience in these forums as well as the way I see people treat others.

    My roommate is an Eagle Scout and he's been out of the closet since about 1994. It may be that there are members of the board of directors that have homohobic characteristics, maybe.... but "THE BOYSCOUTS' are not an organized group of homophobic individuals- and to say that - is so generalizing and pitted against logic... I mean seriously... how can a 7 year old boy be a homophobe unless he understands what they really even means?

    It is also extremely dangerous to cultivate the idea that you have 'the right to not be offended' as that has NOTHING to do with being American at all.

    I have also studied the effects of what happens when people decide to give too much power to sticks and stones and not enough emphasis on emotional responsibilty, thickening their skin or choosing their battles but most importantly- understanding and teaching the next generation that Not everyone is going to like you, Not everyone is Nice and You need to learn to deal with it now... otherwise you will embrace a victim mentality and grow up to be someone that does nothing with their life because :( I got picked on as a kid.

    MAN UP. Take the teasing like every other generation in the past has had to do- its part of becoming socially well-rounded and self-preserving. Mama wont always be there to wipe tears when we are picked on, so we have to learn to deal with it instead of trying to stop it. It will never stop.

    Guys, seriously, LOOK IT UP, the Boy Scouts discriminate. It doesn't mean that all Boy Scouts do...but it is in the organization's rules.
    They are a private organization and have every right to disallow gays being leaders if they want to. You call it being anti-gay, I call it sticking to their principles. If they can have minority only colleges, women only gyms and male only golf clubs then BSA can say they don't want gay leaders. I don't have a problem with women having exclussive gyms or minorities having private colleges. Perhaps people who are not included in these groups should organize their own group that goes by their prefered set of moral stanandards.
  • Sascha
    Sascha Posts: 204
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    Hi Guys,

    Since this topic is in violation of one of guideline, I have gone ahead and locked it from any further comments.

    The guideline in question being violated is: Show Respect to All Groups and Individuals

    No derogatory references to sex, gender, ethnicity, religions, or sexual orientation, or endorsement of violence against any person or group, even if couched in humor, will be permitted. This includes expressing stereotypes about any group or community.

    Lets try and keep our forums conflict free! You can always agree to disagree but no hashing out of particular groups should be done publicly.
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