All I see are flaws..

I'm glad you can see that you have lovely eyes and a smile You are a stunner already. You are alive and young and you're able to change your life.

Maybe you need to stop seeing this as a means to lose weight but instead start seeing this as a way to get healthy. When you're feeling like you do, like I do, like many of us do, its very difficult to lose weight for image sake but for health sake, you will find it easier most likely.

The things you are unhappy about can be solved by eating and drinking - with care, but there is a fine line. Trying to lose weight unhealthily can make these things much worse. So leaning more on the scale towards getting healthy will put you on the right track. Don't forget that thin people can be just as if not more unhealthier than larger people.

And don't forget that you deserve to be healthy, you deserve to feel good about yourself, you deserve to where nice clothes, makeup, have a nice hairdo. I think this is an underlying thing, which I know I suffer from. Is some weird belief that you will look ridiculous in any way that you try and look after yourself. You have just as much right as anyone else to take care of yourself. People will not stop and stare and say/think "why the hell is she bothering" - do you think that might be at the heart of it. I know it is with me. I know that in the mornings before work I feel like an idiot if I try and look nice.

You could be right. If that is all you are capable of seeing and that is what you advertise well that's what others will see. What I see from your post and pic is a nice young lady, who has determination to achieve her goal (otherwise she wouldn't be here and seeking help), who is open and honest and values other people. Love yourself and others will follow. You can do this, just believe in yourself and be the best that you can possibly be. All the best with it

accepting yourself as you are now is not easy. hell, i think it's the toughest part of the weight loss journey! but you know what? it gets easier when you keep practicing at it. the more you focus on what you love about yourself (e.g. your laugh, your smile, your sense of humor, your taste in movies, etc), the more you will feel better about yourself. you will love yourself, flaws and all, and you will be feel more comfortable in your own skin. I promise. Just try, and you will see that things will improve. don't worry keep your head up.

Have to add to this, if you take a look at my pictures you can see how big I was. I thought I'd never look good I mean how can a balloon head on top of a blimp look good? Fact is when you lose it, you'll never know what you'll look like until you do it. I really didn't expect to look the way I do now.

I have to say that once you've got going properly, the compliments will start coming in and you'll feel like a different person. Trust me it's all worth it for that feeling when someone gives you those first few compliments and when you get a special one. To have thought I would get the comment I got off a girl the other night a couple of years ago I'd have laughed at myself and told myself to get a grip. Just so you know the future things people could say to you, I got told the other night:

When this girl sees me she kisses me and always does this little giggle and I asked her why the other night. Her reply was that she giggles because she has to look away from me sometimes because she catches sight of me and realises how beautiful I am. And proceeded to say in a sort of gorgeous way" I've never ever had a compliment even half as nice as that and I was glowing for a few days afterwards, she's an incredibly attractive girl so to hear that from her.. One day you'll get the same!

also if you have the chance you should read the book "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne. It might help some

I'll save you some time - think positively and good things will happen

You're welcome.

On a serious note though - if you really hate looking in the mirror - use it as the motivator it should be. That's exactly what I do.

Just put a post earlier on about this actually - but it was based around the quote from Scrubs

Dr. Cox: The key to my exercise program is this one simple truth: I hate my body....Do you understand the second you look in the mirror and you're happy with what you see, baby, you just lost the battle.

not totally healthy as an approach, but it works for me!