Overweight people putting me down

Options
245

Replies

  • Mad4282
    Mad4282 Posts: 171 Member
    Options
    There is a difference between large women who are confident and comfortable with themselves and women who are bigger and just hate anyone trying to change from being big. I encourage people who are trying to lose weight and love seeing people succeed. I want to get there one day myself! The only time I would ever speak badly is if they were trying some extreme diet or legal speed diet pills/hcg diet etc. and only because it's not safe.

    I think this is just jealousy and hopefully you can move past letting them get to you because it is SO not worth letting their self hating jealousy make you feel bad for being successful and working hard. I am lucky I do not have this problem though! Everyone encourages me and anyone who gets jealous, which is rare, is just not a true friend! :)

    ^^^^^THIS! Great advice! Just keep doing what you are doing, don't let anyone get you down!
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
    Options
    Sounds like what I went through as I lost weight. It seemed like the people who should have supported me the most? Well, those were the ones who turned on me. Commenting about my food ("Oh, don't buy Brandee candy - she only eats bark and grass!"), commenting on how often I went to the gym back then ("Don't invite Brandee to go out with us after work, she has to go to the GYM") and of course just outright snide comments.

    I still occasionally get comments like "You're too thin" (I'm not) or "You should gain some weight back" (Not gonna happen, sorry) or the occasional comment about my food choices because I don't partake in all the stuff they have in the break room (cookies, donuts, bagels, pizza, etc).

    I truly believe it is jealousy. When other people see someone be successful with weight loss, I often think it points out their inability to lose. I also think it makes them more aware of the poor choices they make, but doesn't always encourage them to change. Sometimes, it comes out as nastiness.
  • SunnyAndrsn
    SunnyAndrsn Posts: 369 Member
    Options
    People don't like to be faced with walking, talking reminders of their own failures. They know they should be taking care of themselves but they aren't doing it, so they try to make you feel as bad as they do.

    I remember someone else I know getting annoyed about this. She was never really overweight but she's been working out and looks great and is in great shape. She said people at her work always give her a hard time when she passes on cookies or whatever, remarking on how she doesn't need to worry about it, she's so thin, etc. She said she finally snapped and said "Yeah, and how do you think I got this way? I eat healthy and I work out, and I don't eat EVERY cookie that passes in front of me, so I can eat things like that when I really want to without worrying about it!" I think they stopped saying that stuff after that. :)

    I really like this! We have a LOT of food at work. Next week there is a pot luck, I have a community breakfast I'm supposed to attend next week, chili cook offs, people bringing in there kids' school fundraisers, etc. Tomorrow I have a coworker who wants to buy pizza for everyone. I told her I would pass, I think I offended her. However, I have a planned Chinese food dinner with my husband, thus I'm passing on the pizza. I don't feel like I should be obligated to participate in every single thing like this because it's just ridiculous how often it happens. Pts. frequently bring in thank you chocolates, cookies, etc. I've had the "will power" comments.

    Thing is, I don't really feel like it's a will power issue, I feel it's just a choice. I also DO eat a small piece of chocolate almost every day.
  • wildren
    wildren Posts: 1 Member
    Options
    It's the crab syndrome....if you put one crab in a pot, you have to put a lid on it. If you put two in the pot, you can leave the lid off. As soon as one tries to climb out the other will pull it back in.

    While we are not working our goals, we're in the pot with the other crabs. Once we start working on our goals, we try to climb out - the other crabs cannot do anything other than try to pull you back in. Oh, sure - they try to use nice phrases like, "Oh you don't need to - you look fine", but what they're really doing is pulling you back in. Climb out and then try to pull them out. Once they see your freedom on the outside, having reached your goal, they might try to climb out. The others will try to pull them back, just like they did to you. Be there with a supporting arm to pull them out and reach their goals!! :)

    In any case, remember - you're working toward you goal - be excited and go for it!
  • packersfn7
    packersfn7 Posts: 62 Member
    Options
    Seeing you watch your weight probably just makes people reflect on their own bodies. They're insecure and probably feel like they have to justify eating that cheeseburger while you are eating a salad. Even though you aren't telling them to eat differently, they probably feel like you eating a salad is a statement. I'd just smile and offer to share your healthy lunch.
  • ScarlettVamp
    ScarlettVamp Posts: 828 Member
    Options
    Well it sounds like they are jealous of your hard work. How about you have 12 super hot pictures taken and have them made into a calendar for 2013. Give one to each of them for Christmas and sign it " Day after day, I just get hotter and hotter." That should shut em' up!

    ^^^^LOVE this!!! :laugh:
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    Options
    It's times like this that we all need to be reminded of that wonderful advice given to us by that famous Doctor.


    "B-tches ain't sh-t but hoes and tricks" -Dr. Dre.
  • Taylerr88
    Taylerr88 Posts: 320 Member
    Options
    if a overweight person ever try's to put me down.. and talk trash about why i am calculating everything. I usually just say because i don't want to look like you.

    its mean.. but they should mind their own business. i don't go around judging other peoples daily life..
  • sleepytexan
    sleepytexan Posts: 3,138 Member
    Options
    Misery loves company.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
    Options
    haterz gone hate.

    ive also got this as well and i'm nowhere near where i want to be, but my weight loss so far is noticeable. the people i've gotten attitude from are from people who HATE the fact that i'm pretty much effortlessly losing weight (at least to them). mind you these are people who will try any crazy diet for quick weight loss and will try going to the gym for 4 hours a day. of course they can only keep this up for a week before they get burned out, and they slip back into old habits.

    in the meantime i've only reduced my calories by approx 600 calories, i'm only at the gym 1 hour a day 6 days a week and i still pretty much eat whatever i want, i just watch the portions.

    fast forward 3 months and they have been working crazy hard doing all the wrong things to not lose anything (1 has even gained) whereas I have essentially been lounging poolside sipping a mai tai and have lost 20 pounds and almost 2 pant sizes. i guess i'd be bitter too if the tables were reversed :laugh:

    one of the most annoying things that i've heard "aren't you supposed to be on a diet?" when i eat anything that isnt a salad or a piece of fruit. it's like no matter what, these people don't quite get losing weight isn't about being on some insane diet.

    anyway, don't let it get you down. you never know you might end up being an inspiration to one of the haters :wink:
  • sharonsjones
    sharonsjones Posts: 574 Member
    Options
    Haters gonna hate! I get told the same thing all the time @ work. My doctor even once asked me if I was anoxeric and he proceeded to ask me if I threw up after I ate. He kept questioning me. ****ing *kitten*!

    I was in the hospital last month for pancreatitis that was induced by dehydration (I was not drinking enough water and I run a lot of miles) my doctor asked me if I took diet pills! Omg can't people see that you can be thin by being healthy without taking diet pills or throwing up!
  • zoedallas
    zoedallas Posts: 116 Member
    Options
    I couldn't find my size in a department store, and the saleslady came up and asked if she could help. I explained my problem. Her nasty response? "Perhaps you need to shop in the little girl department." And then she walked off.
  • cbeutler
    cbeutler Posts: 667 Member
    Options
    Seeing you watch your weight probably just makes people reflect on their own bodies. They're insecure and probably feel like they have to justify eating that cheeseburger while you are eating a salad. Even though you aren't telling them to eat differently, they probably feel like you eating a salad is a statement. I'd just smile and offer to share your healthy lunch.

    This

    If you are already smaller than them, and you are losing weight/getting fit they can no longer maintain the illusion they are normal and healthy.

    But you can't be responsible for other peoples delusions. Just do your thing. Keep Calm, Carry On.
  • brearune
    brearune Posts: 26
    Options
    This happens to me SO MUCH!!!! I hate it :/
  • RobynDCrossman
    RobynDCrossman Posts: 252
    Options
    It's pure jealousy. I used to be one of those women.
    Keep on truckin! ;)
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
    Options
    Yes, they are jealous because you have the willpower to do something about your weight/lifestyle and they don't. You could be an advocate and explain you don't have to starve to lose weight and start living healthy.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    Options
    Just smile and realize that you're going to be healthier, fitter, and probably look way better than them for the rest of your life if you maintain it. Let it roll off your back girl.
  • healthylifewealthylife
    healthylifewealthylife Posts: 100
    Options
    Let the haters hate on,misery loves company,too bad you have chosen better company A BRAND NEW YOU!Proud of you,sometimes we have to walk away from those who are no longer walking in the same direction we are going.Been there done that and when it comes to my health,I don'rt have time for foolishness.Keep moving forward!You are a winner and winners never quit!We just keep our eyes on the prize,our health! Unfortunatley,it will get worse before it gets better,this is about you and you are proving to yourself that you are worth all of this,by staying focused on your goals.Congratulations!
  • McKayMachina
    McKayMachina Posts: 2,670 Member
    Options
    Stop caring. The whole world doesn't revolve around you. This has NOTHING to do with YOU and EVERYTHING to do with THEM. Get over it and let them sit in their own misery.
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    Options
    I've noticed that too! Most of the new people on this site are afraid of going to the gym because of all of the really fit people there who can run for an entire hour. However, I noticed that it's the people who are extremely overweight (more so than myself) who are the ones that are hyper-critical of me. But, I'm the type of person who can generally laugh it off or just ignore it all together.

Categories