Help! Need advice to give to my friend...is chatting cheatin

Poniesarepretty
Poniesarepretty Posts: 77 Member
edited December 16 in Chit-Chat
Originally posted this to the wrong forum:

So my best gal pal called me today in tears because she just found out her husband was talking with people on-line and even calling them to...uh...you know. I think that this is cheating...what do you guys think? She is thining of leaving him...I think that this might be over reacting but I have nothing to go from here. Help! Any opions/advice would be appreciated!

Replies

  • Musikelektronik
    Musikelektronik Posts: 739 Member
    So my best gal pal called me today in tears because she just found out her husband was talking with people on-line and even calling them to...uh...you know.

    No, I don't. Calling them to what?
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    That's between them. "Cheating" depends on what's acceptable in that particular relationship. It's not up to you to decide if it's cheating.
  • holthaus30
    holthaus30 Posts: 58 Member
    I dont call it cheating per day but if I was to find out the person I am with was calling people she met online to try and get it on with then I would leave. No point in staying with someone when they have intentions like that.
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
    Deferring that he wasn't chatting with a customer rep on the computer and then calling to place an order over the phone or something and was actually flirting with women online/planning on having an affair etc, I would consider it cheating.

    Even if I didn't consider it cheating, it is still what she feels that matters most.

    She was in tears over it, so obviously she seems to considers his actions to be cheating. Good luck to your friend!
  • MsMuniz
    MsMuniz Posts: 399 Member
    I'm not sure that is something I would run out and get a divorce over, but they definitely need to go to counseling and find out why he is doing this and what is lacking in the relationship. Something like this can be worked through and past, in my opinion.
  • warmachinejt
    warmachinejt Posts: 2,162 Member
    he's calling them because he ran out of sugar and there's no neighbors around the area
  • butterflyliz32
    butterflyliz32 Posts: 124 Member
    My exhusband was doing this as well, and I eventually got fed up and left him. It really damaged our relationship.

    That said, since it isn't your relationship, I would just provide a shoulder to cry on and keep my mouth shut about my opinions. She will be the one to make the call on whether she will leave him or not, so nothing you can say will be all that helpful. I had people tell me to leave my ex for YEARS before I finally did, and all it ever did was piss me off toward that person.
  • Poniesarepretty
    Poniesarepretty Posts: 77 Member
    Thanks guys! This is so out of left field-he is (what I thought to be anyway) a great guy, great with the kids, stays home with her..they seemed happy. I was so shocked that he was calling random women on-line that he was chatting with. She wanted my opinion and I just didn't know what to say.
  • rockerbabyy
    rockerbabyy Posts: 2,258 Member
    That's between them. "Cheating" depends on what's acceptable in that particular relationship. It's not up to you to decide if it's cheating.
    ^this.
    im sure a lot of what happens in my relationship would be considered cheating by someone else - but its not any of their business.
  • JellyJaks
    JellyJaks Posts: 589 Member
    Depends on the relationship. The definition of cheating within my marriage (and yes the hubs agrees with this) is A. Anything you feel you have to hide or B. Anything that you would be pissed to find out your partner was doing.

    ie I don't go chatting with random guys on the internet because I'd be pissed if he was chatting with random gals.
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