One Year on MFP! Pictures Galore!

About a year ago, I was sitting at In-n-Out with my ex-boyfriend, probably my third or fourth trip to the establishment over my Spring Break. It was as I finished my Double-Double that I suddenly woke up--the first of many awakenings I would experience over the following year.

In late March of 2011, I had been in therapy for PTSD and depression for about three months. I had finally begun to reclaim better sleep habits, and I was no longer quite so haunted by anxiety and flashbacks. In other words, I was finally conscious of myself again, in a way that I hadn't been for the better part of a few years. I swallowed a fry and thought, What am I doing?

The last time I had stepped on a scale had been in January. I weighed 163 pounds then, about eight pounds more than my lowest high school weight and 12.2 pounds more than my lowest-ever weight, which had lasted only briefly at the beginning of the summer of 2010. At a height of 5'8", I was only barely overweight according to BMI charts. 163 pounds was nothing compared to my highest weight of 185, or even my freshman year college weight of 172. But I felt fat, sluggish, and out of shape. I didn't like it. I had never, ever been truly physically fit--I had never run a mile in less than ten minutes, and I only achieved that once (and promptly puked afterward)--and suddenly it was an enormous problem for me. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I vowed that the instant Spring Break was over, I was swearing off desserts and chocolate for a few weeks, and I was going to give the MyFitnessPal app I had downloaded to my Android in January the good old college try.

I had attempted calorie-counting before, during my freshman year of college, with a different website, but it didn't stick. I hit my "lowest weight ever", 150.8 pounds, and gave up when I went home for summer and started working 40-hour weeks and going to school at night. I didn't have time to eat well, to count calories, to work out. And as a result I gained back all that hard-lost weight. This time I was determined to see it through to the end. I stepped on the scale the morning of March 28, 2011 and weighed 161.8 pounds, and the journey began.

I started the Couch to 5K plan the very first week on MFP. I'm not sure what I was thinking; I had never been a runner before. When losing weight in the past, I relied on the elliptical trainer and stationary bike. I hated running. But I thought that being able to run three miles would be kind of nifty, so I went for it.

When I went home for that summer, I didn't take summer classes at a local community college, and I didn't get a job. I decided it was time to focus on me for a little while. I started running outside and after the initial shock of a thing called hills, I finally fell in love with it. I also joined a gym the second day I was back in my hometown, and started lifting two-three days per week after reading Weight Training for Dummies. I ran my first 5K on July 4th and got my dad to run it with me. I finished in 29:35, beating my 30-minute time goal. At the end of last summer, I weighed in the region of 145 pounds, which had been my original goal weight. I was ready to go after more.

And then life sort of threw me for a loop. I split up with my boyfriend of four-and-a-half years and found myself back in the dating world for the first time in nearly five years. I finally realized that my year of studying Astrophysics had been a fun and enlightening ride, but that the only thing I had ever cared enough about to do for a living was write, and so I transitioned back to being an English major.

The emotional and academic upheaval put me a little off balance. I spent way more time with my friends than at the gym, and I also had a bit of a party-centric semester, drinking a lot on the weekends and skipping workouts the next day. It got the absolute worst in October and November, when I split up with a guy I'd been dating casually for about a month, and after I had run my first 10K, with a finishing time of 1:03:26. I just didn't know where to go next, and I turned back to food, rather than exercise, for comfort. I had no new goals to shoot for except the elusive 130s, and they just weren't as tangible as any of my fitness goals had been. I was afraid to train for a longer race. I got stuck spinning my wheels.

In late November, I woke up again. My clothes weren't fitting that well anymore. I was feeling tired and sluggish and fat. And when I stepped on the scale I weighed 155.6 pounds.

I put on the brakes. I called a halt to the insanity that had put me at risk for re-becoming what I once was--unhappy and overweight and down on myself. I didn't care if I didn't think I could do it; I was going to train for a half-marathon and keep training until it killed me.

It didn't. It just forced me to stop drinking, to stop eating crappy food, to live my life by water intake and protein shakes and long workouts and the perfect amount of sleep. It made me see who my friends truly are, and which ones really care about me, and which ones just like having me as part of the contribution to the party. And it taught me that I have more drive and dedication to myself than I ever thought possible.

Other amazing things have happened in the last year. I got a tattoo in late October, a piece that truly meant something to me and helped motivate me to continue my journey; I met my boyfriend, a man who supports me in absolutely everything I do and never fails to make me feel loved; I reconnected with my love of literature; I made enormous progress with not just my physical health, but my mental health. My first half-marathon is in less than two weeks. It has been exactly a year since I joined MFP, started running my health and fitness blog on Tumblr, and committed to changing my life forever. It's been a hell of a year, and I can't wait for the rest of the adventure.

And now for the really cool stuff--pictures! Between last March and today, I've only lost 11.6 pounds...but my dimensions at 150.2 pounds very closely resemble what they were at 145 pounds last summer. I've built muscle. What?!







The most shocking aspect of my transformation--at least to me! Didn't expect my upper back to change like that:



First-ever pair of short-shorts!



Here's to another year of health! My plan now is to get my body fat percentage down in the 20-23% range. (: