You Know What Drives Me Nuts?

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yo_andi
yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
in Motivation and Support
... when you summarily comment "Way to go" or "Great job today" on my little status update thingie without even a cursory glance at the contents of my diary. A comment of "Great Day!" on a diary entry that contains only one thing from the perimeter of the grocery store, and the rest is fast or convenience foods, psh, I'd rather get scolded for the obviously not-so-good choices I'm making. No-one is perfect, I get it. But is it too much to ask for you to be real? And instead of just commenting on a "perceived good" like being under my calorie goal, to really take a look at what got me there? /rant.
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  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Well, aren't you a peach.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
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    ... when you summarily comment "Way to go" or "Great job today" on my little status update thingie without even a cursory glance at the contents of my diary. A comment of "Great Day!" on a diary entry that contains only one thing from the perimeter of the grocery store, and the rest is fast or convenience foods, psh, I'd rather get scolded for the obviously not-so-good choices I'm making. No-one is perfect, I get it. But is it too much to ask for you to be real? And instead of just commenting on a "perceived good" like being under my calorie goal, to really take a look at what got me there? /rant.

    To be truthful, I tend not to comment on anyone's diary at all. Especially on the folks who keep crying "why arent I losing weight?" - and when you look at the diary, its nothing but prepackaged/preprocessed JUNK food type items. They profess their undying dedication to exercise, healthy foods (NOT~!), plenty of water, when in fact if they were to pull up a mirror and look at theirself - they STILL wouldnt get the fact that the person responsible for their screwups and bad choices are the person they are looking at in the damn mirror.

    I tell people that want to be on my friends list 'Im not here for you, I will never be here for you, Im here only for myself under doctor's orders - plain and simple... so unless you ask me a direct question, I really dont want anything to do with you here on MFP. I have enough medical problems going on that truly caused my weight problems that Im three physician's guinea pig every four months - I dont care about you on MFP... I know its harsh, but I really dont care. If I expend my concentration and energy on someone else who clearly isnt doing this right, then I lose focus on what I need to do.

    If people want to mess up their weight loss efforts by eating the wrong kinds of foods or too much of the right kinds of foods, let them mess it up for theirself... but they know they cannot expect me to lie to their face and say how wonderful they are doing when in fact, they are just as much the problem as their eating behavior.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
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    Well, aren't you a peach.

    Actually Andi makes a very good point.... how truly supportive are you when you say "good job" when you see a friend's food log has been entered - but when you look inside the log, its full of very poor food-related choices? Blindly supporting someone is just as bad as the person willingly choosing to keep the wrong foods around and indicating that you have consumed them...
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Well, aren't you a peach.

    Actually Andi makes a very good point.... how truly supportive are you when you say "good job" when you see a friend's food log has been entered - but when you look inside the log, its full of very poor food-related choices? Blindly supporting someone is just as bad as the person willingly choosing to keep the wrong foods around and indicating that you have consumed them...

    So drop the friend, but why call someone out on here?

    People like to be picky about what other people do. It annoys.
  • libby328
    libby328 Posts: 287 Member
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    I also never understood why people say
    "Good job" when people are wayyyy under daily calorie goals! Isn't the.point to eat that many and from what I understand doesn't your body fight weight loss when you don't have enough?
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
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    Yeah I'm a peach, I'll concede it. I'm here because I'm not getting the kind of support and accountability in "real life" that I need. Plenty of people have dropped me as a friend on here precisely because I call them out. But if we're here for accountability, then that's what you're going to get, and I'd like the same in return. I guess the truth isn't everyone's bag, but not facing the truth or being truthful with ourselves is what got a lot of us here in the first place.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Yeah I'm a peach, I'll concede it. I'm here because I'm not getting the kind of support and accountability in "real life" that I need. Plenty of people have dropped me as a friend on here precisely because I call them out. But if we're here for accountability, then that's what you're going to get, and I'd like the same in return. I guess the truth isn't everyone's bag, but not facing the truth or being truthful with ourselves is what got a lot of us here in the first place.

    You clearly know that your choices were not great, so why do you need others to point it out?

    OK. You suck. Make better choices next time. Happy?
  • Krizzle4Rizzle
    Krizzle4Rizzle Posts: 2,704 Member
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    Well when you have 100+ friends it's not so easy to look at everyones diary. When I say congrats I am not saying way to go on what you ate. I am NOT a dietitian so I have no idea what works for others bodies. I am saying congrats on stepping up and taking the time to fill out a food diary. I try not to judge what people eat.
  • _HeathBar_
    _HeathBar_ Posts: 902 Member
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    Interesting, I remember a thread a few days ago where the OP was upset because someone on their friend list gave constructive criticism of their diary instead of the obligatory "WTG".

    Damned if you do, damned if you don't I guess.
  • CountryBoy65
    CountryBoy65 Posts: 908 Member
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    You have got a whopping 17 friends...and these friends are the only ones who may be commenting on your diary...so why don't you send them a PM, or better still, unfriend them if it is such a problem. But no, instead you throw your criticisms of your friends participation out here for the entire MFP world to see. Thats classy! Great Job. WTG!!!!!!
  • missy_1975
    missy_1975 Posts: 244 Member
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    A steering wheel in the crotch?
  • csparon
    csparon Posts: 200 Member
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    ... when you summarily comment "Way to go" or "Great job today" on my little status update thingie without even a cursory glance at the contents of my diary. A comment of "Great Day!" on a diary entry that contains only one thing from the perimeter of the grocery store, and the rest is fast or convenience foods, psh, I'd rather get scolded for the obviously not-so-good choices I'm making. No-one is perfect, I get it. But is it too much to ask for you to be real? And instead of just commenting on a "perceived good" like being under my calorie goal, to really take a look at what got me there? /rant.

    Get over yourself. People don't have time to check all of MFP's diarys, we do have lives you know? Anyway, just delete them. They're obviously too positive to be your friend.
  • JenAiMarres
    JenAiMarres Posts: 767 Member
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    I only comment on diaries I actually look at...if I don't think they did great I may not say anything...sometimes I point out that breakfast is the most important meal of the day if they skipped..or if they had junk.. Sometimes we talk about the junk. Yes I have had days with three bottles of champagne on it...and have gotten "good jobs"..but I think most of my friends like champagne!! Lol!

    Maybe delete the friend if u find thier support superficial....
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    You know, you could scold yourself for the poor choices you're making, instead of relying on other people to do it.
  • MollyDukes
    MollyDukes Posts: 233 Member
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    Interesting, I remember a thread a few days ago where the OP was upset because someone on their friend list gave constructive criticism of their diary instead of the obligatory "WTG".

    Damned if you do, damned if you don't I guess.

    Exactly!!!
    And if I do see a problem in someone's diary I still congratulate them so I don't embarrass them infront of their other friends and if need be, PM them. My goal is to keep them positive so that they do keep coming back and don't get discouraged. Tiny changes are better then no changes!
  • ihateroses
    ihateroses Posts: 893 Member
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    This only bugs me when someone says "good job" and the person ate a yogurt and an ice cube and called it a day.
  • rprussell2004
    rprussell2004 Posts: 870 Member
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    A steering wheel in the crotch?

    A pirate walks into a bar. He has a steering wheel mounted in the front of his trousers.

    The bartender looks at him and asks, "Hey, did you know there's a steering wheel stuck in the front of your pants?"

    The Pirate growls at him. "Yarr, of course I do."

    "Well where the heck did it come from?" asks the bartender.

    "Arr, I don' know. But one thing fer sure - 'tis drivin' me nuts!"
  • RynoSada15
    RynoSada15 Posts: 48 Member
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    Well, aren't you a peach.

    Actually Andi makes a very good point.... how truly supportive are you when you say "good job" when you see a friend's food log has been entered - but when you look inside the log, its full of very poor food-related choices? Blindly supporting someone is just as bad as the person willingly choosing to keep the wrong foods around and indicating that you have consumed them...

    Because the purpose is to be supportive, not just of calorie consumption but also of healthy weight loss. I see it too, being under cals isn't the best thing but people just quickly respond without paying much attention. That being said, if one knows that you are making poor choices, why are you waiting for someone on your MFP friend list to tell you? You obviously can look at your diary and see poor choices that are being made, so don't rely on someone else to tell you. If you need motivation, help or advice, you're better off asking.
    So drop the friend, but why call someone out on here?

    People like to be picky about what other people do. It annoys.
  • LifeOnMars_
    LifeOnMars_ Posts: 755 Member
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    Interesting, I remember a thread a few days ago where the OP was upset because someone on their friend list gave constructive criticism of their diary instead of the obligatory "WTG".

    Damned if you do, damned if you don't I guess.

    Exactly what I was thinking.

    If you have a problem with what someone is saying to you it's simple really... Delete.
  • paruls86
    paruls86 Posts: 188 Member
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    Chill... its ok sometimes you just want your friend to know you still are keeping a track of his/her progress even though you may be busy... I cannot comment on your friends but it feels good when any one of my friends comments WTG on my diary entry ... I am fully aware of my choices and honestly would be a bit too irritaed if every day people would pick on my food habbit I am trying to change them for sure...but it takes time.. also be a bit merciful towards those who cheat... I'd rather just encourage people to first control their intake and then when the quantity is under control and they are still struggling .. i can help them out... but sorry not every day...

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