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I think the cougar is ready to pounce

UponThisRock
UponThisRock Posts: 4,519 Member
edited December 2024 in Chit-Chat
Some of my friends might remember that a certain cardio bunny has been ogling me at the gym. Not really a big issue, she's usually wrapping up as I arrive, so I only have to be uncomfortable for a few minutes.

But this morning was just a little different. She wasn't just kinda checking me out like she usually does. When I arrive at the gym, she's giving me one of these:

tonydungy.gif

I'm scared. Should I be wearing pants with a rusty zipper?

Replies

  • p0pr0cksnc0ke
    p0pr0cksnc0ke Posts: 1,283 Member
    :laugh:

    Just show her how your wee wee can lift that weight in your pic :wink:
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    :laugh:

    Just show her how your wee wee can lift that weight in your pic :wink:
    ^^This
  • Phrak
    Phrak Posts: 353 Member
    Tell her about your bowel movements. Ask her if shes keeping score.
  • abigailm83
    abigailm83 Posts: 110
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
    This made my morning :)
  • jcrooks85
    jcrooks85 Posts: 21
    lmao!
  • shedoos
    shedoos Posts: 446 Member
    Pfft- Rusty zippers don't stop us --

    sooner or later - you're going to have to pee...

    2009128174423_Cougar-4.jpg
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,519 Member
    :laugh:

    Just show her how your wee wee can lift that weight in your pic :wink:

    No wee wee strength involved in that lift.

    You should see how I do pushups though.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    burp, fart, and pick you nose . . . problem solved.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    :laugh:

    Just show her how your wee wee can lift that weight in your pic :wink:

    No wee wee strength involved in that lift.

    You should see how I do pushups though.


    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    :laugh:

    Just show her how your wee wee can lift that weight in your pic :wink:

    No wee wee strength involved in that lift.

    You should see how I do pushups though.
    That won't get rid of her - that will make her want you to demonstrate - ON her.
  • SheehyCFC
    SheehyCFC Posts: 529 Member
    You should see how I do pushups though.
    It sounds like she would prefer if you do that exercise on top of her...

    **EDIT - dammit. Corylda beat me to it. Stupid slow connection...
  • ssforcey
    ssforcey Posts: 92 Member
    Some of my friends might remember that a certain cardio bunny has been ogling me at the gym. Not really a big issue, she's usually wrapping up as I arrive, so I only have to be uncomfortable for a few minutes.

    But this morning was just a little different. She wasn't just kinda checking me out like she usually does. When I arrive at the gym, she's giving me one of these:

    tonydungy.gif

    I'm scared. Should I be wearing pants with a rusty zipper?

    This cracks me up.
  • awidener86
    awidener86 Posts: 247 Member
    :laugh:

    Just show her how your wee wee can lift that weight in your pic :wink:

    No wee wee strength involved in that lift.

    You should see how I do pushups though.
    That won't get rid of her - that will make her want you to demonstrate - ON her.

    Exactly!
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    Ask her if you can live temporarily in her guest bedroom till you can afford a car while working your job at blockbuster... she will disappear like a cake in Oprah's dressing room
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
    Wait until she's done on her exercise bike and then sniff the seat....!!!

    Wait, that'll probably have the opposite reaction....
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • GorillaNJ
    GorillaNJ Posts: 4,024 Member
    Can you hammer a six inch spike through a board with your penis? A girl's gotta have her standards.

    real genius! Love it!
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,519 Member
    Can you hammer a six inch spike through a board with your penis? A girl's gotta have her standards.

    Early in the morning, maybe.
  • cbseastrunk1729
    cbseastrunk1729 Posts: 8
    The Blockbuster comment cracked me up...So funny and yes that would work!
  • Jennicia
    Jennicia Posts: 409 Member
    OMG I'm laughing so hard at all these comments!!! :laugh:
  • skinnywithin
    skinnywithin Posts: 1,392 Member
    Can you hammer a six inch spike through a board with your penis? A girl's gotta have her standards.

    THIS IS WHY I KEEP YOU ON MY FRIENDS LIST !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!LOVE IT
  • radradradradrad
    radradradradrad Posts: 101 Member
    Wait until she's done on her exercise bike and then sniff the seat....!!!

    Wait, that'll probably have the opposite reaction....

    hahahahahaha! all of this!
  • tiamaria3
    tiamaria3 Posts: 92 Member
    :noway: lmao!!!


    14260509.png
  • briteyes1002
    briteyes1002 Posts: 313 Member
    Oh my!
  • catshark209
    catshark209 Posts: 1,133 Member
    Ask her if you can live temporarily in her guest bedroom till you can afford a car while working your job at blockbuster... she will disappear like a cake in Oprah's dressing room

    Also add in you're trying to save up to move out of Mom's or Grandma's basement.
  • TK266
    TK266 Posts: 3,638 Member
    just let her pounce ... cougars need love also, and you are just being selfish. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • songbyrdsweet
    songbyrdsweet Posts: 5,691 Member
    Some of my friends might remember that a certain cardio bunny has been ogling me at the gym. Not really a big issue, she's usually wrapping up as I arrive, so I only have to be uncomfortable for a few minutes.

    But this morning was just a little different. She wasn't just kinda checking me out like she usually does. When I arrive at the gym, she's giving me one of these:

    tonydungy.gif

    I'm scared. Should I be wearing pants with a rusty zipper?

    If you're 31, how old is the cougar? No offense, just curious. :flowerforyou:
  • Farfourah
    Farfourah Posts: 896 Member
    Bone her.
  • llahairdna
    llahairdna Posts: 502 Member
    Bone her.

    Short, simple, to the point. I love it. Ready, GO.
  • warmachinejt
    warmachinejt Posts: 2,162 Member
    really? i kind of had the ogling thing too....from a woman with a guy and children lol wut
This discussion has been closed.

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