I'm in starvation mode and my fat gain is only getting worse

What is your current caloric intake? 105 @ 5'5 is quite lean

Do you think maybe you VIEW yourself as having bits of fat because you lost muscle mass? I can't imagine someone who is 5'5" and weighs 105 to have a lot of extra fat hanging around. I understand having a distorted body image...I was anorexic for years and still have problems eating enough food. I'm always in starvation mode myself but I'm trying to keep my calories where they need to be as well as working out so I can tone up. I think a nutritionist is a great idea as well as a psychiatrist to help with the body image problems. I used both when I got down to 85lbs and my friends and family freaked out about how small I was. Good luck to you! I hope you get everything figured out!;-)

This site is very weird and not trust worthy I think, for numbers. but I'm obviously in starvation mode. I'm not lean at all.

I think a counciller might be best. It's almost impossible for you to go from what you looked like earlier this month to pudgy. In those pictures I can see your hip bones jutting out. If you've not put on weight and are eating at 1300 calories I have a very, very hard time believing you've managed to turn your muscle into that much fat that quickly.

At the very least see your doctor. They can give you the best advice.

ACG she's eating 1300 but does seem to be eating her exercise calories back.

How do I build my muscles back up, get out of this starvation mode, boost my metabolism where it use to be, and burn this fat off? Oh, and I'm 21, female and 5'5"

Lifting heavier weights (I did see you are doing weight lifting from your diary) and building up to more calories. You don't need to lose weight (purely going by the BMI scale you're underweight) you need to change your body compastion. You know this, but you need to stop eating at a deficit. Losing pounds won't change your body shape.

Is your strength program designed by someone?

@around 1,300 cals at her weight, her intake should be sufficient. If you do think you're putting on fat at that intake, I'd talk to a doctor and get some tests done to see if you are suffering from any thyroid or metabolic disorders

I am not a nutritionist or anything, but I did work at a fitness/weight loss center for a little while. If you feel like your metabolism is worn out, you MUST let it rest and recover. Your body is like a car, and your food is like gas. If you don't give your body what it needs, when it needs it, you are running on fumes and that is terrible for your metabolism. Let it rest!

Up your caloric intake (about 1,600 a day) for 4-8 weeks. Increase your lean protein - you have to have this to rebuild your muscles. Beans, nuts, quinoa, cottage cheese, chicken breast, pork loin, etc. Fill 1/2 of your plate with veggies - you can eat as many veggies as you like, whenever you are hungry. Eat some fruits. Shop the perimeter of the grocery store (avoiding the processed foods full of hidden sugar, fat, salt, and chemicals) - fresh produce, lean meats, low fat dairy, whole grains. Drink lots (at least 8 glasses) of water a day - this will help with your digestion. Also, low-fat yogurt (without all the fruit syrup) with probiotics, produce and whole grains full of fiber, help digestion. Cook with cooking sprays or a little olive oil - avoid extra fats. Avoid sugary drinks.

After a month or so, then you can cut back again to about 1,200, maintain that for about a week. You should see a few pounds your fat start to melt off - fat, not muscle. Eating lots of protein helps to protect your muscle. This week just a jumpstart.

After a week, up your calories again to around 1,400. This should give you a slower fat loss (meaning it will stay off easier) and is still protecting your muscles. This period should last you about 2-3 months.

After that you should be where you want to, so you would just increase your calories to around 1,500-1,600 to maintain. Remember, if you aren't giving your body the fuel (healthy calories) that it needs, it will rebel again. If you find that you fall off and are gaining, then just start the process over again.

And you must exercise!!!! You have to build that muscle, and that takes a little time. Find out WHY you are really doing this. Focus on your HEALTH and make it a priority. Walk/Aerobics/Zumba for about 30 minutes, 4-6 times a week. Do muscle building exercises about 3 days a week. Your muscles need time to recover, so always give each group of muscles a day to rest in between workouts. You can use free weights, Curves for Women (only 30 minutes a day), or find exercises on the internet. I like Shape.com, Prevention.com, Bodyrock.tv, Livestrong.com, and there are many more.

The main thing is to make sure that you are healthy, and that your weight is good for YOU. If you are too thin, then your body rebels! This will only make maintaining a healthy weight harder for your body in the future and you only get one body, so take care of it! Its going to need to be around for a while, and working properly! You want to maintain a healthy weight. If you are 5'5", then your ideal weight should be closer to 115-130lbs. If you are outside of that, you should go see your physician for a check up, and see what he/she recommends would be best for you, and how to achieve it.

Good luck!