It's my own fault for posting it but....damn

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DLDzioba
DLDzioba Posts: 422 Member
in Chit-Chat
So I've got a few friends who love reddit to death and a while back they showed me one of the subforms there called Am I Ugly. Basically you post a few pictures of yourself and other people will tell you what they think and try and give you some advice on what they think you can do to improve your looks.

Last night, well early this morning at like 4AM, I posted a thread on there. I did post in comments that these are not my most recent pictures and I have lost 30lbs so far. Most of the comments didn't bother me too much but a few were downright hurtful.

"Fat IS ugly!"
and
"Be active, eat less; seriously!'

Mostly I can let it slide but I went a looked back at the pictures I linked to and noticed that people had tagged them. The tags used across all 4 (included below) were Fatty, 2x4, donteatme!!, and Shamu


Seriously?! I know I am obese, but the hateful things people say on the internet are sometimes just too much for me.

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Replies

  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    You look nice, but yeah, don't post your pics on the internet asking for random strangers to comment. You know what's gonna happen.
  • runnercheryl
    runnercheryl Posts: 1,314 Member
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    I think you look great! Don't let them get to you. Unfortunately, that site was clearly going to encourage that behaviour, and you might post with hopes that you'll get a positive comment or two but on the internet a lot of people are naturally set to 'negative/cruel', rather than 'positive/supportive'.

    Ignore it, and move on.
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
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    Don't ever expect reddit to be nice. You are beautiful.
  • TheReese1206
    TheReese1206 Posts: 238
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    Don't post stuff like that. They don't know you at all and there are many out there who just want to hurt people. I think its great you lost 30lbs. Keep up the good hard work!
  • honestlysweet
    honestlysweet Posts: 221 Member
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    Yes, the internet is a cruel place. But you kind of have to expect that when posting pics of yourself. My daughter, a college girl, has many many pics of herself on facebook, which she figured was private, viewable only by her friends. But she has like 800 friends, many of which she really doesn't know, only met them at parties or wherever. She is very attractive, and has lots of bikini/beach pics plus others of her at Halloween parties and dressed up in sexy costumes. These pics have somehow ended up all over the internet, on many different sites. So once you put a pic up you are opening yourself up for lots of input, good or bad.
  • DLDzioba
    DLDzioba Posts: 422 Member
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    I was only mildly offended by two comments on reddit, the tagging on the image hosting site is what bothers me most. I did get a few private messages on reddit telling me I'm beautiful. :)
  • HotBodUnderConstruction
    HotBodUnderConstruction Posts: 420
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    First of all, congratulations on your weight loss. However, I am sorry to say that posting pictures of yourself asking others to judge you is just asking for it. It doesn't matter what size you are or how good looking you are, there will always be people out there that a) want to be mean and b) just won't find you attractive! Just look at several of the celebrity threads posted in here. Most recently there was a Kim Kardashian thread, and sure several people said they thought she was pretty, but for every compliment there was a comment that was much more critical about her looks (too big, too fake, too whatever). Just don't do it. I know for certain I don't have the thick skin to deal with any possible array of colorful comments.
  • FloodlitWorld
    FloodlitWorld Posts: 22
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    Going on the internet and expecting anonymous strangers to be 100% nice is much like dressing up like a banana and visiting the monkey house... it ain't gonna go well, and faeces may fly.
  • connie_messina
    connie_messina Posts: 495 Member
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    omg you r far from ugly!!! your beautiful ! dont let these idiots get to u!! misery loves company and there ignorant miserable ppl!!
  • BigBoneSista
    BigBoneSista Posts: 2,389 Member
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    Why even subject yourself to that? Seriously. There are cruel people out there who just get their kicks off making others feel as miserable as they are. I think we beat ourselves up enough. We don't need any added help. For some reason I'm feeling like its a self-esteem thing for you because you felt the need to post your pics on there a 4 am and now you are up here seeking some added attention. They gave you negative feedback...now you need positive feedback. None of the comments posted truly matters unless you know where your beauty lies.

    Do "YOU" think you are beautiful?

    That's what matters.
  • mixedfeelings
    mixedfeelings Posts: 904 Member
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    I know I'll echo what a lot of people say, just don't be disheartened, people are just mean on purpose on the internet, they would most likely leave the same comments to a blank photo. So here; :flowerforyou:
  • RiverTom
    RiverTom Posts: 216 Member
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    Going on the internet and expecting anonymous strangers to be 100% nice is much like dressing up like a banana and visiting the monkey house... it ain't gonna go well, and faeces may fly.

    I agree. And to comment on your pics. You are uniquely you and have as much a right to be you as anyone else does. People who judge your appearance are usually either not happy with their own or they are genuinely trying to help, but just haven't found the way to be nice about it.

    So, I believe you look great, but you certainly are able to do something to improve your looks. You wouldn't be on MFP if you didn't have the desire to make changes. So why shouldn't people encourage you to do so?

    I wish you the best of courage and success! Well done on the weight loss so far!
  • KrisyKat
    KrisyKat Posts: 749 Member
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    The key to true beauty is confidence, my dear. The fact that you created such a post already sends the message that you are in a vulnerable state. People who say hurtful things do it purposely to negatively affect you. By showing signs of insecurity, you are inviting more unfriendly and unwanted responses. The truth is that trying to solicit for positive comments online will never give you the satisfaction of earning a true compliment in a real life situation.

    What makes you feel beautiful? What are your talents and hobbies? What makes you unique? What makes you...you?

    The answer to these questions will help you to find the beauty which you already possess. And, once you feel empowered by these traits, you will exude loveliness. Learn to love yourself- believe in the power of your individual beauty- and others will follow suit!!
  • NotGoddess
    NotGoddess Posts: 1,198 Member
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    This is why I've not yet succumbed to posted to the 'Rate the person above you' threads on here. I know I'd post it when I'm feeling pretty good and some idiot would post '-3 and I just went blind' or something equally cruel and I'd spiral downward.

    You are pretty as you are. You have nice, symmetrical features and as you slim down your bone structure is going to pop out more-it looks like you'll have a diamond or heart-shaped face that'll make your eyes pop beautifully. If you have been overweight for a while then you have some great muscle underneath-you need it to support the weight. If you lose slowly and train/eat to maintain the muscle you'll have a great shape.

    Don't let the haters get you down.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
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    i dont get it.. you posted pictures on a site for others to critique and give their opinions about but you're upset because you were critiqued and didnt like the opinions? noone ids required to accept you or love you are think you're beautiful. that's where you come in.

    dont ask for opinions unless you're prepared to hear something you dont want to hear.
  • littlepinkhearts
    littlepinkhearts Posts: 1,055 Member
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    Yes, it was your decision to post your pics on such a forum, so i'd give you A+ for bravery cause I could never do that lol Dammmm girl don't you know that there are people out there just waitin to eat you up and spit you back out? What were you expecting? You're a pretty girl and you have a pretty smile. I can't comment on your personality cause I don't know you. All I can offer is don't put yourself out to strangers to validate yourself cause 10 to 1, it's a fail. :flowerforyou:
  • connie_messina
    connie_messina Posts: 495 Member
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    Why even subject yourself to that? Seriously. There are cruel people out there who just get their kicks off making others feel as miserable as they are. I think we beat ourselves up enough. We don't need any added help. For some reason I'm feeling like its a self-esteem thing for you because you felt the need to post your pics on there a 4 am and now you are up here seeking some added attention. They gave you negative feedback...now you need positive feedback. None of the comments posted truly matters unless you know where your beauty lies.

    Do "YOU" think you are beautiful?

    That's what matters.

    well said! so true!!
  • buyer225
    buyer225 Posts: 17 Member
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    People suck and are mean. Are they really so perfect? Take the pictures down. They will only continue to upset you with the nasty comments. These people don't know you. You look happy in the pictures and that is the only thing that matters!
  • mfisher16508
    mfisher16508 Posts: 269 Member
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    bad idea, lesson learned, you look great and congreats onthe weight loss.
  • 1shauna1
    1shauna1 Posts: 993 Member
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    Yeah, unfortunately as you said, it's your own fault for posting.....you are going to get every jerk out there just making rude comments. I don't know why you'd (or anyone!) put yourself through that.....Take 'em down and be happy!

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