Gotta vent

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tlc12078
tlc12078 Posts: 334 Member
in Motivation and Support
You know, its sad you know your big and people act like you dont know your overweight and being over weight is bad for you. Even after you told them you already lost weight, they still need to inform you. Like "Ok I know you lost weight but whatever, your still a pig so starve and make it happen overnite" Thats how I feel. Everyone dont know everyones story, but we come to conclusions (assume) that we some how know everything about everyone and we are a bunch of know it alls. I lost 5 pounds since I started this. I am happy about this, but then still feel frustrated about the assumptions that people make of me. How dare you judge me or how dare we judge anyone at all. Who are we to think we know it all. How dare anyone who has always been skinny to automatically think big people gorge on food all day. Do you know for sure? Do you keep tabs and obsess over big people just so you can talk about them? I feel like giving up already just because. I am doing this for me, but when I keep getting told you still are overweight and fat (when you lost weight) I feel so hopeless. It just brings me down even more. I think skinny people do this to have that control over someones emotions. Idk its like if I lost weight its like "see how fat you were?" or if I didnt "your always going to be fat" Just so freakn hopeless.
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Replies

  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
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    People suck. Some less than others but as a general rule, people suck. Do what you need to do and ignore those that don't support you. You can control your reaction to them, but you can't control them.
  • Amanda_Rae_Rae
    Amanda_Rae_Rae Posts: 109
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    I understand where you are coming from. I have a friend who is the same way. I was overjoyed when I reached a loss of 15 pounds, and all she could say was "Hmm, well good job but you still have a long way to go." Like I didn't realize that! I've realized that what matters the most is how we feel about ourselves. No one else knows the amount of effort and determination we have put into the weight we have lost.
  • iamfranniefierce
    iamfranniefierce Posts: 305 Member
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    Haters...another word for doubters. Challenge the doubt with action...action and doubt are incompatible. Also, focus on the change not the results because with change comes inevitably results. Let your haters become your motivators.
  • JeSuisPrest
    JeSuisPrest Posts: 2,005 Member
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    People can suck like previously said. I think most speak without thinking. Even when you lose the weight their will be comments. Now that I've lost a total of 45 lbs I hear comments all the time too, and I'm not talking about compliments either. Sometimes I wish people would just mind their own business and let others be.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Don't let it get you down! Until people start telling you how great you look, you need to completely ignore everyone around you! Fabulous job, by the way, losing 5 lbs!! Great work and keep it up!
  • AzIceQueen
    AzIceQueen Posts: 5 Member
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    I understand exactly how you feel. I also hate it when "skinny" people say they are fat. Ok if you're fat then I must be a Whale! I want to scream at them and say stop trying to get a compliment and try giving one to someone who is really making an effort to loose weight.
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
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    Haters gonna hate...

    Winners gonna win. ;)

    Which will you be?
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
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    Wow oh wow wow wow!!! I know what you mean..it sucks turtle penis, it does!!!
    But....one day...ONE DAY they'll eat those words!!!

    Keep your chin up...and your *kitten* out....it'll be easier for them to kiss.

    Congratulations on the loss :flowerforyou:
  • dicoveringwhoIam
    dicoveringwhoIam Posts: 480 Member
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    I have lost a total of 30lbs and some people are noticing, some not so much... It stinks but I am not doing this for other people, I am doing this for myself so I feel better, not to make other people feel better and more comfortable about me.

    I was in a kettlebell press class a few weeks ago. I walked in about 2minutes late and they were starting so I grabbed my mat and my bell. I ended up in the front row. aaccckkk. There was a lady behind me and her boyfriend, husband, man servant> I dont know what he was to her but he was something. I was doing lunges and accidentally stepped on her mat and as I turned around to apologize she was snottily grabbing her mat and look at her whatever he is and said "I don't even know why shes here." aaahhhh you suck lady! Actually after the class I turned around to her and said, "You know what fat girls know they are fat, we dont need to be reminded, plus remember we aren't typically house trained either so next time I may end up peeing on your mat." She had nothing to say. I smiled cleaned up my stuff and left.. Sometimes you need to develop a thicker skin or a sharper tongue and let it roll. Anyhow, I haven't seen her back and I must mention she couldn't keep up with the class and I could..
  • Vespyr
    Vespyr Posts: 111 Member
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    No matter what you do in life people will try to bring you down. Surround yourself with people who are supportive. Do what makes you feel good. You can only control your own actions...not those of other people.
  • mikeyboy
    mikeyboy Posts: 1,057 Member
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    No matter what you do in life people will try to bring you down. Surround yourself with people who are supportive. Do what makes you feel good. You can only control your own actions...not those of other people.


    ^^^^ what she said!
  • RenaPink11
    RenaPink11 Posts: 343 Member
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    Haters...another word for doubters. Challenge the doubt with action...action and doubt are incompatible. Also, focus on the change not the results because with change comes inevitably results. Let your haters become your motivators.

    This!! :smile:
  • toysbigkid
    toysbigkid Posts: 545 Member
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    Don't give up, never say give up. They are not your friends if they are harassing you. It's good to vent and we all need that from time to time. 5 lbs. is a start to your future, before you know it, it will be 15 then 45 and so on. Keep your chin up. I believe in you!!!!
  • diana_marie8302
    diana_marie8302 Posts: 84 Member
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    No one can have control over your emotions but you. Don't let people rent space in your head for free! :) People have to make others feel bad so they feel good. Keep doing you and things will work out in your favor! I don't even know you and I have faith you can accomplish your goals!
  • jameslpipes
    jameslpipes Posts: 11
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    Go ahead and get it off your chest by evting and then forget about it. You should be very proud of the 5 pounds you have lost and you obviously have the drive to lose even more so let em run their mouths and don't give it a second thought. A lot of times people feel the need to put down others accomplishments because of the disappointment they have about their own failures. Keep up the good work.
  • sla456
    sla456 Posts: 21
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    I have lost a total of 30lbs and some people are noticing, some not so much... It stinks but I am not doing this for other people, I am doing this for myself so I feel better, not to make other people feel better and more comfortable about me.

    I was in a kettlebell press class a few weeks ago. I walked in about 2minutes late and they were starting so I grabbed my mat and my bell. I ended up in the front row. aaccckkk. There was a lady behind me and her boyfriend, husband, man servant> I dont know what he was to her but he was something. I was doing lunges and accidentally stepped on her mat and as I turned around to apologize she was snottily grabbing her mat and look at her whatever he is and said "I don't even know why shes here." aaahhhh you suck lady! Actually after the class I turned around to her and said, "You know what fat girls know they are fat, we dont need to be reminded, plus remember we aren't typically house trained either so next time I may end up peeing on your mat." She had nothing to say. I smiled cleaned up my stuff and left.. Sometimes you need to develop a thicker skin or a sharper tongue and let it roll. Anyhow, I haven't seen her back and I must mention she couldn't keep up with the class and I could..

    Good Job!! Some people are just rude!! I love what you said to her : )


    Yes you need to do what is good for you and don't listen to what others say and think!
  • coconutbuNZ
    coconutbuNZ Posts: 578 Member
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    Hey these people who have said these things to you are just plain rude! Use that anger to motivate yourself even more so you can show those *kitten* once and for all!
  • HollywoodDJ
    HollywoodDJ Posts: 296
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    No matter what you do in life people will try to bring you down. Surround yourself with people who are supportive. Do what makes you feel good. You can only control your own actions...not those of other people.



    GREAT ADVICE!!!!! If you want to be a Strong, Positive, Healthy, Vibrant Person....(Loving and Compassionate too) who do you hang out with...Other people just like that!!!!!! Take heart hunne and keep moving forward...and DO NOT GIVE UP....because then those *kitten* win and we can't have that!
  • chrishgt4
    chrishgt4 Posts: 1,222 Member
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    I do agree totally - and people can be ****s.

    However, I do think people expect a lot of support from people right from the off - like I lost 3 lbs - cheer for me - well, they probably can't hardly notice and whilst you know you are on the right track, as far as they know that 3lbs could be a big dump.

    I never want to fish for a compliment off of anyone because then you're just forcing them to say it.

    Do the hard work for yourself, and then when they start complimenting you off their own back it means something.

    Then when they stop even mentioning it it means even more because you know you've gone from 'fat person got thin' to thin person staying thin' and even 'person they are jealous of so don't want to compliment'

    The moral of this story is - screw everyone else - do it for yourself.
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
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    skinny doesn't equal fit. I'm 330lbs and I can out run, out hike, out work my 115lb wife. she's working out to get in shape while I work to loose weight. I could care less what other think of me because I'm not doing this for them ;) Don't let ignorant people keep you down.

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