logging for your spouse

issyfit
issyfit Posts: 1,077 Member
edited December 17 in Motivation and Support
Has anyone set up an account and logged food for a spouse without them knowing, then showing it to them after a period of time to make a point of how badly they are eating? I am very tempted to do this.
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Replies

  • Soucy2022
    Soucy2022 Posts: 11 Member
    I do the logging for my husband - but he knows about it. We're getting healthy together. He looks at the breakdown and it helps him also gage portion size and food choice better. I think if you did it for your husband and then showed it to him it would defiinitely open up a conversation and perhaps lead to the two of you doing this together as well. My husband and I now talk more about what the better choices to eat at meal time are and what to buy and bring into the house and what not to. No matter, we are definitely both eating healthier. Good luck. :)
  • JoolieW68
    JoolieW68 Posts: 1,879 Member
    I would never do that, since I know how furious I would have been if my husband had done it to me.

    You can't force someone to start taking better care of themselves. They have to want it for themselves and do it themselves. You can certainly coach them once they have made that decision.

    I'm also curious how you would know exactly everything your spouse is eating..are you with them every minute of the day? If they are eating poorly at home, why is that food in the house in the first place?
  • jajeff
    jajeff Posts: 3 Member
    I am logging for my husband too, its easier when you are both doing it. we are both loosing :) he does know about it !
  • lsapphire
    lsapphire Posts: 297 Member
    I helped my spouse set up his account. He isn't into keeping track, but does eat according to his plan and lets me know if he cheats. He lost 10 lbs in the first 2 weeks. I'm so proud of him.
  • PrincessLou71186
    PrincessLou71186 Posts: 741 Member
    I started logging for me then suggested to my hubby that I log for him also so I can see just how badly I 'used' to eat. He agreed, downloaded the app and off he went. He came back to me a week later and said "Princess, with the amount I eat I am surprised I am not the size of a house."

    Now he logs everyday, joined my gym and is working on getting healthier.
  • DALENEWELL
    DALENEWELL Posts: 11 Member
    I am logging for my wife. She wants me too. We started together. She isn't as computor friendly as I am so I get stuck with the job but it doesn't take too long.
  • iwillsoonbeslim
    iwillsoonbeslim Posts: 283
    I would never do that, since I know how furious I would have been if my husband had done it to me.

    You can't force someone to start taking better care of themselves. They have to want it for themselves and do it themselves. You can certainly coach them once they have made that decision.

    I'm also curious how you would know exactly everything your spouse is eating..are you with them every minute of the day? If they are eating poorly at home, why is that food in the house in the first place?

    ^^THIS^^!
  • MommaKit79
    MommaKit79 Posts: 852
    I started an account for my husband on here and then I told him about it, but ONLY after he expressed a desire for wanting to lose weight. I got him to download the app on his phone and he went online to fill out the goal information and all. NOW, he doesnt use it but, I keep trying to bring it up to him about using it. But, you can lead a horse to water but you cant make it drink! :)

    GOOD LUCK and maybe discuss it with him to see what he thinks about doing it.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
    Has anyone set up an account and logged food for a spouse without them knowing, then showing it to them after a period of time to make a point of how badly they are eating? I am very tempted to do this.

    Hell no.... I wouldnt dare do that to my husband. Only my husband needs to come to the point where he has that realization 'its time to make better choices', just like I did after consulting with some specialists I see regarding my medical problems. It is completely wrong of me to do something like that. Im not his doctor and I certainly dont want to be 'that kind' of person to remind him like his mother would.

    When my husband is ready, Ill help him see how this works, but I most certainly wont log his intake and then show it to him as a reality check. Its just cruel. It would be cruel if he did it to me.
  • bug1114
    bug1114 Posts: 268 Member
    I agree, you cannot force someone to take better care of themselves. They have to want it. In my experience, when I started focusing on myself alone, and taking better care of me, my spouse took notice and then was motivated to take better care of himself.
  • jagar07
    jagar07 Posts: 266 Member
    haha, I did this! well, I did ask him first. My hubby has been having a lot of trouble losing weight BuT WILL NOT LOG ANYTHING! So I did it for him and he learned he is not eating enough! haha, he still wont log, even though I have an account set up for him, oh well.
  • rileamoyer
    rileamoyer Posts: 2,412 Member
    I haven't but have been tempted. He is not overweight but doesn't eat properly. LOL
  • MrsLVF
    MrsLVF Posts: 787 Member
    Has anyone set up an account and logged food for a spouse without them knowing, then showing it to them after a period of time to make a point of how badly they are eating? I am very tempted to do this.
    No, you might as well call him fat. How would you like it if he set up an account for you & then showed you everything you're doing wrong?
  • sdrawkcabynot
    sdrawkcabynot Posts: 462 Member
    You know - my mom always said that if she ever divorced my dad - he wouldn't know his *kitten* from a hole in the ground... couldn't pay bills so on and so forth. I guess the same could be said about (some) married men! Where would they be without you responsible ones? lol
  • Newfiedan
    Newfiedan Posts: 1,517 Member
    You can not force a horse to drink water simply bring them to it. A man especially has to want to change before it will happen. Also the "bad" choices as per the diet/fitness industry is largely skewed and not on base for real results so I tell them to cram their diet mantras and I will keep getting better results my way, based on science and fact not diet broscience.
  • htmlgirl
    htmlgirl Posts: 314 Member
    I wouldn't and with all the stuff my husband eats, it would take me forever, not to mention I don't monitor what he eats outside the house (lunch, snacks, etc). Unless he wanted me to, I wouldn't do it and I would be a little upset if he did it to me.
  • Meggles63
    Meggles63 Posts: 916 Member
    No...My hubby has an account, and I helped him log, but after a few days he lost interest. If he's not that interested, why should I waste my time? As a matter of fact, as he didn't log in for over a week, I DEFRIENDED him :tongue:
  • amymrls
    amymrls Posts: 1,673 Member
    I would never do that, since I know how furious I would have been if my husband had done it to me.

    You can't force someone to start taking better care of themselves. They have to want it for themselves and do it themselves. You can certainly coach them once they have made that decision.

    I'm also curious how you would know exactly everything your spouse is eating..are you with them every minute of the day? If they are eating poorly at home, why is that food in the house in the first place?

    ^^This. It is eveyones own choices that make who they are. I think it would be horrible and mean. If you are worried about their chouces in food you should respctfully bring it up to them and let them know you are worried about them. Maybe suggest going to the doctor for bloodwork and making sure they are staying healthy.
  • samf36
    samf36 Posts: 369 Member
    No way would I do that. It is insulting and degrading.
  • strunkm4
    strunkm4 Posts: 265 Member
    I log for mine. I'm the one who does all the cooking and plans all our meals, so it's easier for me to just go in and log what I make. He logs all his own snacks, water, and exercises. We are doing this together so it makes it much easier. I can say, he was used to his McDonalds breakfasts every AM and when I finally showed him how bad the stuff he was eating actually was, he did a complete 180 with his diet and exercise. He's now just as into this as I am!


    Would I create an account and log for him without knowing? Absolutely not. I love the fact that he willingly chose to join this with me. I mentioned the idea to him and told him I wanted to start it, and he was open and accepting of the idea to join as well.
  • butterflyliz32
    butterflyliz32 Posts: 124 Member
    My husband has his own account and logs his foods. He has lost 23 lbs since the beginning of the year (way more than I have!). I am so proud of him!

    That said, my exhusband used to want me to log and basically be responsible for his food and stuff, and I refused. He used to complain that if I cooked everything for him (I had a full time job and he didn't work), then he would lose weight. I pointed out that I WAS cooking healthy dinners, but if he wasn't satisfied with an actual portion size, he would just run out to Jack in the Box and order 6 tacos and 2 burgers. I wasn't going to allow him to try to pin the responsibilty on me, when he is a grown man who should be taking care of his own health.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    no way in the world. For one, he would be pissed/hurt that I would go behind his back and do something of that nature, then be that much more hurt that I thought he needed to and rather than talk to him about it up front, I was monitoring everything he ate, logging it, then presenting it to him when he says "I'm not sure why I can't lose any weight..." in what seems can only be a "THIS is why you don't lose any weight" fashion out of left field.

    Plus, how in the WORLD would I know what he eats or doesn't eat when we're both at work? He claims he never eats, but I know him and know that is a little white lie...
  • DivaDiane
    DivaDiane Posts: 73
    I did for a while and made him tell me everything he ate so I could log it. He finally saw the light and began making better food choices and cutting out all the extra helpings (and cutting down on wine, too). He is now mindfully eating, for the most part. Since I do all the cooking and cook everything from scratch, his diet is pretty good. He is exercising and getting on the scale every week. I don't log for him anymore, but I do record his weight about once a week. So far, so good.
  • issyfit
    issyfit Posts: 1,077 Member
    Thanks for all of you opinions. I do know everything he eats because we both work out of the house and I fix all of his food. I was thinking a little "tough love" but probably not a good idea.
  • JoolieW68
    JoolieW68 Posts: 1,879 Member
    Thanks for all of you opinions. I do know everything he eats because we both work out of the house and I fix all of his food. I was thinking a little "tough love" but probably not a good idea.

    Wait....you fix all of his food? Why not just fix him healthier food to eat?
  • issyfit
    issyfit Posts: 1,077 Member
    Thanks for all of you opinions. I do know everything he eats because we both work out of the house and I fix all of his food. I was thinking a little "tough love" but probably not a good idea.

    Wait....you fix all of his food? Why not just fix him healthier food to eat?

    Because he insists on having his chips, pastries, cookies, and M&M's, to name a few. I wanted to show him how it all adds up.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
    Thanks for all of you opinions. I do know everything he eats because we both work out of the house and I fix all of his food. I was thinking a little "tough love" but probably not a good idea.

    Wait....you fix all of his food? Why not just fix him healthier food to eat?

    Because he insists on having his chips, pastries, cookies, and M&M's, to name a few. I wanted to show him how it all adds up.

    ugh!
  • soccerella
    soccerella Posts: 619 Member
    I haven't but have been tempted. He is not overweight but doesn't eat properly. LOL

    yea....i dont think id actually do it though.....For one thing I don't know what he eats all day, but I know for a fact it isnt healthy! But he weighs less than i do, and has no health problems so he doesn't seem to think there is something wrong. I am concerned about his long term health and it would be interesting to have something to show him just how badly he is eating and all, but like others said, until he come to this realization himself that what hes doing is unhealthy then its no good telling him

    Switching the tables, if he did that to me, I would immediately get super emotional and hurt assuming he thinks im fat/unattractive/ etc.
  • mmstgr
    mmstgr Posts: 578 Member
    ewwweee
    that would just turn into one of the biggest fights of the century!

    how would you feel if someone did that to you?
  • runnercheryl
    runnercheryl Posts: 1,314 Member
    Not a chance. Never.
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