Too fat to exercise?

2

Replies

  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    I hope you reported this to her boss. I'm dead serious. No trainer should do that to you and make you feel that bad, free session or not.

    I'm so sorry you experienced this. I had something similar happen to me about two months ago, and it really shook me up.

    Just keep working hard on your goals, whatever they may be, and kudos for being brave and getting into the freeweights!
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    Your mistake was going to Planet Fitness. They're a joke when it comes to weight training, honestly. They marketed their whole company off of picking on bodybuilders and power lifters. It may be worth trying a different gym. If not, hit up www.bodybuilding.com, navigate to Super Site then Exercises and feast your eyes on a glorious array of video demonstrations. When you get back to the gym, practice your Squats, Deadlifts and Bench Presses with an unloaded bar until you're comfortable with the movement and add weight sensibly.
  • _SusieQ_
    _SusieQ_ Posts: 2,964 Member
    Screw that. I weigh more than you. I do kickboxing, cardio dance, weights at the gym. And I even did Warrior Dash last year. Do NOT let one person have that affect on you. I had more than one instructor give me that pity crap so I just found another class I felt more comfortable in.

    Maybe she was trying to help by showing you how you could modify things, but she also should have shown you what you asked for.

    Don't give up!
  • vwbear
    vwbear Posts: 87 Member
    I can understand where you are coming from. I started out at the gym a year ago, and I srted out slowly. I've never been physically active, and I have back/neck issues, so I let the trainer start me off with a modified program. It seemed like I wasn't doing much to start with, but as I kept it up, I was able to slowly add more repetitions, increase the weights, and add new exercises. I also got 'brave' enough to start giing to a live Zumba class, and although I can't go as often as I'd like, I love it. Little by little I've been able to kick my program up a notch, and I am able to do so much more now than I could when I began! One of the trainers at the gym started talking to me last fall about a couch to 5K type program he and another trainer were starting in January, and he thought it would be a good program for me, so....I signed up to do it, and will be running (intervals) in my first 5k next weekend. (I'm definitely the turtle in the race, but I'm doing it!) But I digress. I'm just tryiing to say that there's nothing at all wrong about building up slowly-you're less likely to get hurt, and the feeling that you're making progress is empowering. I wish you the best of luck! :drinker:
  • LovelyLibra79
    LovelyLibra79 Posts: 569 Member
    Nancy..where is Planet Fitness? never heard of them

    Look at it this way....Contestants on the BIGGEST LOSER were over 400 lbs and doing all sort of exercises...that lady is lazy and retarded. Find you a better gym and trainer!
  • maricash
    maricash Posts: 280 Member
    This trainer sounds like she is definitely not the right one for you. Keep looking and I'm sure you'll find someone who's a lot more encouraging and with whom you can work well.

    That said, there is nothing wrong with doing modified versions of exercises. Like with any kind of exercise, you want to start out at a level that is challenging to you personally, while not being so advanced that you get discouraged and give up. It's better to do a modified version than to injure yourself doing a full version, or wear yourself out to the point that you don't want to do the work out again. Think of the beginning exercises as being like the first weeks of something like the Couch to 5k program, you start off small so that you can do the harder things later.

    Finally, please don't ever think you're "too fat to exercise." I have let myself fall into that at times and all that's happened is that I've felt depressed, gained even more weight, and then had an even harder time exercising the next time out.

    Good luck and I hope you find a trainer who will treat you with the respect that you deserve.
  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    You need a new gym.
    You need a new gym.
    You need a new gym.
    You need a new gym.
    You need a new gym.

    I'm sorry, but it's the truth. If you need legitimate personal training where they give you training that's in line with your goals, you won't get it at Planet Fitness.
  • LizKurz
    LizKurz Posts: 340 Member
    Thanks!

    Yes, I know I can lose weight without exercising. That's why I wonder if I shouldn't just give up on the whole exercise thing until I lose some more weight. I'm 267 now (sw 288). I just wonder if there is a point when you get too fat for exercising and should I just focus on losing weight until I can exercise without special modifications. But exercising is more fun than munching on a celery stick. I also swim 3x a week now that the weather is nicer.

    I was just so excited and motivated and now I just want to cry! I thought I was doing so good and now I feel like a big fat hog!

    I would just go back and do what I was doing before (circuit weights) because it was working I think, but that seems silly now that I read about what a waste of time those machines are.


    I really hope you don't give up on exercise, there are so many other benefits, like mood stability, cardio and respiratory fitness, not to mention faster weight loss, and keeping muscle while you do it.

    Please, please don't quit.

    As for the trainer I will say as somene who used to weigh 252, the weight exercises are much harder and injuring yourself is easier when your heavier. With that said, the trainer totally effed up and should have never told you that you were too fat to do them. I think though, that you have a great routine, and a lot of what you mentioned, I still do, 6 years later. I think that if it's challenging to you, keep at it!
  • Evelyn_Gorfram
    Evelyn_Gorfram Posts: 706 Member
    It sound like the PT may not have known how to teach an overweight person how to lift. (Maybe kind of like when hairdressers have never dealt much with long, thick hair like mine; and so they cut it much shorter than I asked, thin it out like crazy, and then put it into their favortite style formuch shorter, thinner hair.) If she doesn't know what extras pitfall or added risks a lift might have for someone who is overweight, then she might have felt she couldn't resposibly teach you those lifts.

    I second the suggestion that you go to her boss, or someone in the gym's mangerial staff. Explain that you were denied the type of personal training that you requested and are due by the terms of your contract; and that the PT was tactless and rude. I predict that either:

    1) You will get a someone to explain to you exactly how to do the lifts you asked about, possibly with cautions that doing certain moves with your extra bodyweight in place might be risky in ways X, Y or Z; or

    2) Whoever you speaking to will just repeat what the PT said, possibly in a tone in keeping with the gym's apparent "tactless and rude" policy. If so, demand to be let out of your contract, with an appropriately pro-rated refund. (If they refuse, I suggest that you repeat this demend in a raised voice. If they still refuse, repeat it louder and, if possible, in a well-populated public area of the gym. If you find youself shouting, swearing, or crying, that's fine as long as you are still speaking clearly enough that everyone in earshot knows why you are so unhappy with the gym's policies. I've never had to do something like that at Planet Fitness, but I can tell you from personal experience that most mangerial staff will do just about *anything* to get a loudly unhappy customer to stop being so loud and unhappy in front of all their other, not-yet-unhappy customers.)

    Then go shop for a gym and/or a PT who will help you learn to lift properly and will treat you with respect.
  • onmywaytoskinny155
    onmywaytoskinny155 Posts: 228 Member
    Thanks!

    Yes, I know I can lose weight without exercising. That's why I wonder if I shouldn't just give up on the whole exercise thing until I lose some more weight. I'm 267 now (sw 288). I just wonder if there is a point when you get too fat for exercising and should I just focus on losing weight until I can exercise without special modifications. But exercising is more fun than munching on a celery stick. I also swim 3x a week now that the weather is nicer.

    I was just so excited and motivated and now I just want to cry! I thought I was doing so good and now I feel like a big fat hog!

    I would just go back and do what I was doing before (circuit weights) because it was working I think, but that seems silly now that I read about what a waste of time those machines are.

    At 302 pounds I took my big fat butt to the gym and walked on the treadmill you don't need a trainer to make you feel bad right now. Keep going to the gym and exercise on your own!
  • Eureka175
    Eureka175 Posts: 77 Member
    sparkpeople.com shows videos on how to do many excercises properly - a good place to start learning, and it's free
  • thedreamhazer
    thedreamhazer Posts: 1,156 Member
    Screw that. I weigh more than you. I do kickboxing, cardio dance, weights at the gym. And I even did Warrior Dashh last year. Do NOT let one person have that affect on you. I had more than one instructor give me that pity crap so I just found another class I felt more comfortable in.

    Maybe she was trying to help by showing you how you could modify things, but she also should have shown you what you asked for.

    Don't give up!
    This! You absolutely have the ability to learn the weighted exercises. What she showed you wasn't worthless, but if she made YOU feel worthless then she sucks at her job. Persevere!
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    hit up www.bodybuilding.com, navigate to Super Site then Exercises and feast your eyes on a glorious array of video demonstrations.

    THIS!

    BB.com's video library is wonderful!
  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    Nobody is too fat to do these exercises. You may need to start out with less weight than the regular Joe, but her saying this was an obvious copout to show you exercises she obviously isn't good at coaching. Planet Fitness has a habit of getting in the way once your programming advances. I was told I wasn't allowed to do Deadlifts, Power Cleans or Overhead Presses. This was after years of being a member (and I had done 2 out of 3 of those exercises there before, and they said nothing).

    Look at other gyms. Especially if you can find locally-owned ones with good reputations.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
    I'm sorry these people have been so rude to you. But they may be genuinely concerned that you're not sufficiently conditioned to do the routines you want. Why don't you see a a doctor and get some referrals to a physical trainer, in other words, someone with real training?

    There's also a specialist, I believe the title is "physiatrist," who is a medical doctor trained in body mechanics. Maybe you should see someone like that.
  • SusanleeBee
    SusanleeBee Posts: 144 Member
    I'm heavier than you, 327, and worked with a trainer for the first time today. He was very encouraging, teaching me the same squats as you, with a weight, chest presses and ab work. He encouraged strength training, and it was a very good experience. I think you need to shop around for someone else. If i can do it, you can too!
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    This is one of the rare times when I actually felt mad reading this.

    NOBODY IS TOO FAT TO WORKOUT! You want to bike? Go ride a bike. I have a friend on my list who was 300 lbs overweight and started running at his initial weight. Sure, you wont do as well as other fit folks but there is no way in hell an excuse like "you're too fat to workout" is called for. I was 100 lbs overweight and I was doing boxing (very intense workout) and yes, first day I wanted to leave after 15 minutes in but you stick with it and now I'm there for over 2 hours all the time.

    Dont let these dumbasses dictate what you can or cannot do and get moving!
  • jetscreaminagain
    jetscreaminagain Posts: 1,130 Member
    They lie! Don't let them discourage you! Exercise, lift weights. You're right they're wrong. Talk to the manager like Q said and if he or she doesn't make it right tout de suite, flip em the bird on the way out and never go back!

    I'm doing new rules. Its challenging, but you can do it. Modify if necessary, but follow YOUR interests! You're paying them! Grrrr!
  • NancyNiles
    NancyNiles Posts: 145 Member
    Go to this website:

    http://nerdfitness.com/blog/

    There are wonderful videos that show you exactly how moves like squats should be done. Click around on everything then click it again. I've learned more from 2 nights of cruising this sight than I have from a month of reading "what to do" on MFP. Best of all they teach you how to start small and work your way up bit by bit. NO gym needed at all. Best of luck to you...you CAN do this and so can I!

    That's a neat site!! Thanks for the heads up :)
  • Same as what everybody is saying -- that lady was full of it. As long as you are doing the lifts with the right form you'll be fine. Find a new gym with someone who will help you lift correctly.
    Go for it!
  • CyberEd312
    CyberEd312 Posts: 3,536 Member
    When I started I weighed 560 lbs. and was unable to walk from room to room without the aid of a computer chair to roll myself around the house.. I was pretty much home bound for the last 2 years and in May 2009 I made the choice to get busy living or get busy dying. I choose life, I had to start in the pool because the water displaced my weight enough to allow me to stand and walk in the water so that is what i did.. I had to find the courage to go out in public to do this and ended up going through the wellness center through the YMCA. I spent 17 months in the pool and lost 175 lbs. before I was able to be fitted with braces (for my bad knee's) and was able to start exercising outside of the pool.. Since then I have lost another 130 lbs. and am a few months away from skin surgery and 6 months away from knee replacements. Do not let anyone or anything stand in the way of your own goals. Sometimes you have to look past the doubters and concentrate on yourself... Just do not give up......
  • crazyellybean
    crazyellybean Posts: 999 Member
    It all starts with a single move, if you can do 1, than next time you can do 2.. don't ever let anyone tell you that you cannot do something, because it always starts with 1, 1 move, 1 person, 1 moment!
  • celticgladiator
    celticgladiator Posts: 49 Member
    when i started doing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu i was almost 360 lbs. sure, i was very good at some of the things but i could find ways to work around that. the point is, i did it anyway and the other guys there who were all much younger than me, were very patient with my and encouraging. its pretty sad that a trainer who is supposed to help people better themselves would make someone feel that way. keep up the great work!!!
  • nz_deevaa
    nz_deevaa Posts: 12,209 Member

    I was supposed to use weights for the lunge... she said to do them without the weights because these things were "too advanced" for me.

    I asked my PT to help me do a triceps dip because they did it in a class I go to, and I didn't know how to do it.

    At first he said "That's too advanced for you, lets try something else instead"

    I responded with "Lets just see if I can do one! Show me how I have to set myself up."

    He looked nervous, but showed me what to do. I couldn't do it and got stuck and he had to help me up off the ground, but I laughed, he laughed... I said "OK, now tell me what I have to do to get there."

    He relaxed with me, and now, even if he thinks something is "too advanced" for me... we give it a go first. Sure I might need to be helped up off the ground sometimes.

    But now he treats me like any one of his younger, thinner, stronger clients... he knows I'll try anything he throws at me, he's not scared to take weights out of my hands and replace them with heavier ones... I had to prove to him first that I would give stuff a go though... I'm sure he has had lots of clients that have said "I can't do that"... and that's how he expected me to be.

    Find a trainer that is willing to push you... but you have to be willing to push them to.
  • heylatimer
    heylatimer Posts: 60 Member
    Don't be afraid to ask folks in they gym for a bit of help. That trainer that you talked to should be ashamed of herself - i agree with the one comment that they may be working in fear of a liability lawsuit if you hurt yourself.

    You can do this!!!
  • jenny95662
    jenny95662 Posts: 997 Member
    You are not too fat to exercise. However, the NROLFW may be a fit advanced if you haven't been doing strength training for a while.

    It sounds like you have a good starter program outlined for you. Do you find the routine challenging? If it's challenging, then what's the problem? You can always slowly add some of the stuff from the book.

    i disagree the book is made to help you in the beginning thats how i started and i am 280 pounds and do stuff in the book.

    I am sorry u went through that and i say get a diff trainer that one should be ashamed.
  • thepanttherlady
    thepanttherlady Posts: 258 Member
    I used to be a member of 24 Hour Fitness many, MANY years ago. I wasn't as overweight and out of shape as I was then as I am now. I had a wonderful trainer then that pushed me like nobody's business. I cursed him throughout my sessions, he just made me work harder. I guess my point here is that he tested me, pushed me, and never questioned my ability to do something I said I wanted to do. Up to the time I left the gym, my main work outs were in the free weights section...with the men.

    Sadly, too many people make judgements based on appearances. I hope this wasn't the case but I would have expected an experienced PT to have you do some basic weight lifting to see where your strengths and weaknesses were. This would have allowed them to build a work out customed to you.

    If you're set on free weights (and btw, good for you!!), I would ask to speak with another PT and explain what your goals are. Don't be afraid to ask them questions if something doesn't make sense to you (e.g. Why can't I do that?).

    On a side note, please continue with the cardio you're doing. Your heart will thank you. :) There are also strength training exercises you can do at home before heading to the gym. These will help you lead up to the free weights: push ups, sit ups, squats, etc. They help with your core strength and build muscle.

    Do NOT ever give up!!! That's how most of us ended up with the weight gain to begin with. We gave up on ourselves.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    If anyone ever tells any of you that you're "too fat to exercise" make sure you tell them that they're "too stupid to speak."

    OP: Do not give up! You rock it out like nobody's business in that gym. Do it for you and let the haters keep on hating.
  • kazzari
    kazzari Posts: 473 Member
    Well, that was officially the most embarrassing, deflated experience of my adult life. :embarassed:

    About 2 weeks ago I got a copy of the New Rules of Lifting for Women and read about how the exercises I'd been doing (circuit weights) were fairly pointless for anything other than just burning calories and that they were designed by fitness centers for people to feel like they are weight training, but in reality they are just herding them around the room from station to station and out the door.

    I've already lost 20 lbs in 13 weeks doing that stuff and modifying my diet. I've started including more protein for muscle growth because I read about how muscle burns more than fat, and that by weight training I'm preserving and building new muscle vs. cardio alone which burns both muscle and fat fairly indiscriminately. I was feeling enlightened and motivated!!

    I finished the book and finally got up the nerve to get out of the circuit weight room and into the free weight section of the gym. I considered paying for a personal trainer to make sure I was doing the exercises correctly and make sure I use the right weights, etc. I sent off emails to every trainer advertising on Craigslist in my area. All but one of them were not interested in working with an overweight soccer mom (not their exact words... they came up with a variety of excuses for why they couldn't work with me even though I responded to their ads the day they posted.)

    Somewhat discouraged I decided to make an appointment with the trainer at my gym (Planet Fitness). My membership says it comes with unlimited fitness training, but when my appointment time came, she said "haven't I already seen you?" I said yes, but I want to change my workout. "Change?" The idea seemed preposterous to her, but I told her I want to start a free weight program and told her the lifts that I needed to learn to start with.

    She basically told me I was too overweight to do them and proceeded to stick me in a corner (not the free weight section) and show me a variety of "modified" exercises for "people like me."
    I needed to learn the squat... she taught me a wall squat with a swiss ball.
    I needed to learn the deadlift with a long bar..... she taught me some sort of exercise where I lower my upper body while holding 10 lb barbie bells.
    I needed to learn a prone jackknife.... she bit her bottom lip and said I needed to replace it with an ab twist exercise on the swiss ball.
    I was supposed to use weights for the lunge... she said to do them without the weights because these things were "too advanced" for me.

    I did the things she showed me and I think perhaps they did some good because my legs hurt something fierce. But the whole experience left me on the verge of tears. I was mortified to basically be told I'm too fat to do this.

    I'm sure if I pay a trainer I could get him to show me how to do the exercises in the book, but now I'm wondering if maybe I shouldn't try to lose some more weight before I bother with exercise. I don't want to do the stupid treadmill like the other pudgy 40-somethings in my gym. I can walk around my neighborhood for free. I have a Wii Fit, and Xbox Kinect. I can burn calories doing pointless stuff at home.

    Or maybe I should just give up accept the fact that I've crossed over into the realm of being too fat to exercise :cry:

    Wow...that's terrible! I've done the workouts in all The New Rules for Lifting books and anybody can do those exercises. I am a personal trainer and workouts like in that book are exactly what I would use for any client. If you lived in my area, I would be happy to show you all the exercises. I don't know how big you are...some of the exercises could require slight modification. But deadlifts are awesome. If you can squat down far enough to reach the bar with a straight back, you can do them. I hate ball/wall squats. I'd rather have you squat back to a bench until you feel comfortable squatting without one. I do think it is a good idea to go through all the exercises without weights the first time through...even for someone who not very heavy but simply not familiar with the exercises. I starting weight training with The New Rules of Lifting, followed by New Rules for Women, the New Rules for Abs. Also, Rachel Cosgrove's Female Fitness Breakthrough is great. I would love to help you...feel free to message me.
  • myak623
    myak623 Posts: 615 Member
    That trainer is an idiot. Good for you for wanting to do these lifts. I would bet she didn't want to show you these lifts because she doesn't know how to do them. It's a shame that some folks are allowed to be trainers.